delta
May 15th, 2010, 11:13 AM
I feel like shit. My emotions are fucking with me. I want to die. But I can't even cry. The tears won't come, no matter how much I want them to. I pretend to smile, because I don't want to worry anyone. My beloved music doesn't help at all. I can't see anything that would make a change for the better in the near future, in fact I think everything will just get worse. I feel horrible for cutting yesterday and the day before, and I want to do it again right now. And this time, I don't want to stop at all. Even if I end up in hospital or worse. In case I do something stupid and succeed, I want you VTers to know that I really enjoyed getting to know you. If I don't, I'm sorry to have you worry.