rockabye baby
April 24th, 2010, 05:44 AM
Okay I'm just going to ramble on here but I need to say something other wise I think I'm going to go mad hahaha.
Anyways this boy I liked who I've been talking to since about December had been telling me since like the end of December until about last week that he loved me.
I mean yeah he has broke my heart before and I'll always remember that about him, but he's done the same thing again!
I suppose I should tell you what went off the first time, well it all started on msn one night we were talking and he was saying he loved me and all the stuff like you do when you like someone. It got to about half 11 and I said I had to go because I need to get to bed as I had school in the morning I went offline all happy, slept perfectly fine and in the morning I saw I had a text from him.
I read the text and all it said was that he thought I was an awesome friend and that he didn't want to risk our relationship that we had by trying to make it more.
That really put me into depression and I showed my best friend the text that morning and the first thing she said to me was there's another girl I know it. I refused to believe thinking that he wouldn't because he was too decent but that night after I got home from swimming he had a girls name on his personal message and a love heart next to it, all I thought was I am such a prick why didn't I see it coming? Why would someone take interest in me I ain't worth it.
Months passed and then he started again acting like he liked me and I fell for him all over again (stupid me) and one night he said he still loved me and he was sorry for what he put me through all I thought was yes! and again months passed and everything was picture perfect like before.
Then recently in the last two weeks he's been seeing this other girl and I thought at first oh it won't last he's done this before and I was right for the first bit something went wrong I don't know whether it was to do with the girl but he started up again with the I love yous and I went along like a blind person.
Then yesterday he said the girls name and that he wasn't happy because he didn't get to hang out with her and all I said in return what he said was okay.
He asked what was wrong and if I stilled liked him and I lied saying that I wasn't bothered about him anymore and that I didn't care, he didn't believe me and said he wouldn't bother asking anymore and my reply to that was good.
He then said well I'll just go then goodbye Krista, and I was mad at that point and put back fine bye!
Then he blocked me and all I felt was sadness so I posted this on facebook: one person can hurt ur feelings just like tht :/ why do I even bother?? Why do I waste my time when I know I'm just going to get hurt?? it's like da ja vue all ova again :/
He unblocked me at that point and came back on msn and said hi, as soon as I saw the convo come up I closed it, all I thought was no he said goodbye why should I talk to him? then he said Krista? and again I closed the convo down.
I then had to get off msn all I thought was I can't take this. That night I spent it crying sat with my best friend Tyler. Then Tyler said something that made me think: "If he really did love you then why would he do this too you? I mean if he really meant it he wouldn't want to hurt you and he would have tried to make it work and actually have asked you to be his girlfriend" I thought about that and even though at the time I disagreed with Tyler something deep down inside told me he was right.
Anyways I'm just posting this up because I thought well if people read this then maybe they'll learn something like I did.
Boys aren't worth the heart ache and if you're really meant to be with that person then they'll make the effort to make it work and not just go for someone else.
I was stupid enough to believe he wouldn't do it again and like the first time I learnt the hard way, but to be honest I've learnt now. I will not wall for that boy again and I am just going to get on with my life he had his chance and he took advantage of that, that's his loss not mine!
Anyways this boy I liked who I've been talking to since about December had been telling me since like the end of December until about last week that he loved me.
I mean yeah he has broke my heart before and I'll always remember that about him, but he's done the same thing again!
I suppose I should tell you what went off the first time, well it all started on msn one night we were talking and he was saying he loved me and all the stuff like you do when you like someone. It got to about half 11 and I said I had to go because I need to get to bed as I had school in the morning I went offline all happy, slept perfectly fine and in the morning I saw I had a text from him.
I read the text and all it said was that he thought I was an awesome friend and that he didn't want to risk our relationship that we had by trying to make it more.
That really put me into depression and I showed my best friend the text that morning and the first thing she said to me was there's another girl I know it. I refused to believe thinking that he wouldn't because he was too decent but that night after I got home from swimming he had a girls name on his personal message and a love heart next to it, all I thought was I am such a prick why didn't I see it coming? Why would someone take interest in me I ain't worth it.
Months passed and then he started again acting like he liked me and I fell for him all over again (stupid me) and one night he said he still loved me and he was sorry for what he put me through all I thought was yes! and again months passed and everything was picture perfect like before.
Then recently in the last two weeks he's been seeing this other girl and I thought at first oh it won't last he's done this before and I was right for the first bit something went wrong I don't know whether it was to do with the girl but he started up again with the I love yous and I went along like a blind person.
Then yesterday he said the girls name and that he wasn't happy because he didn't get to hang out with her and all I said in return what he said was okay.
He asked what was wrong and if I stilled liked him and I lied saying that I wasn't bothered about him anymore and that I didn't care, he didn't believe me and said he wouldn't bother asking anymore and my reply to that was good.
He then said well I'll just go then goodbye Krista, and I was mad at that point and put back fine bye!
Then he blocked me and all I felt was sadness so I posted this on facebook: one person can hurt ur feelings just like tht :/ why do I even bother?? Why do I waste my time when I know I'm just going to get hurt?? it's like da ja vue all ova again :/
He unblocked me at that point and came back on msn and said hi, as soon as I saw the convo come up I closed it, all I thought was no he said goodbye why should I talk to him? then he said Krista? and again I closed the convo down.
I then had to get off msn all I thought was I can't take this. That night I spent it crying sat with my best friend Tyler. Then Tyler said something that made me think: "If he really did love you then why would he do this too you? I mean if he really meant it he wouldn't want to hurt you and he would have tried to make it work and actually have asked you to be his girlfriend" I thought about that and even though at the time I disagreed with Tyler something deep down inside told me he was right.
Anyways I'm just posting this up because I thought well if people read this then maybe they'll learn something like I did.
Boys aren't worth the heart ache and if you're really meant to be with that person then they'll make the effort to make it work and not just go for someone else.
I was stupid enough to believe he wouldn't do it again and like the first time I learnt the hard way, but to be honest I've learnt now. I will not wall for that boy again and I am just going to get on with my life he had his chance and he took advantage of that, that's his loss not mine!