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Doll
April 20th, 2010, 06:26 PM
I feel kind of bad.
I went to the school guidance counselor, because I've been really worried about my friend. She used to cut, and she talked about suicide a lot. She hasn't been herself, or even really talking to me at all, lately. On her blog she's been talking about loosing weight, even though she's like a stick already. She went anorexic once before. So I asked her if she was doing it again, and she wouldn't talk about it- just kept drawing flowers and talking about other things, since we were passing notes. And I know her life at home isn't the greatest. She always says she's fat, but she's really not at all.
I went to the guidance counselor and told her I was worried, and what was going on. She pulled her from P.E. and I guess we had a mini-intervention. Our counselor is totally awesome, though, so it wasn't awkward at all.
When she asked what my friend ate for breakfast this morning, she hesitated and said yogurt. She asked what flavor. She went, "Ummmm....Strawberry?" but it definitely took her a second. So I think she lied about that. She said that she's been writing about suicide, but that she doesn't want to hurt herself. She only showed us one arm, though, so she still might be cutting. And people don't just cut their arms, they cut their stomachs or legs sometimes. So she's not really in the clear there, either.
I do feel bad, though. She cried. But she wouldn't cry if she didn't have something to hide, right? I'd be angry that someone was accusing me of that. The last thing I would do is cry. Unless it was true. I'd cry then. My counselor and my mom said it was the right thing to do, but I don't know anymore. Was it? She totally hates me now. I'm fine with that, I'd rather her hate me than end up dead. I'm going to highschool next year anyway, just have to survive 34 more days.
She thinks I told our friend about it, but I didn't. I would never do that to her. Why would I? I don't gossip. Especially about something as serious as this. I don't think she gets how much I care... It's like she thinks I just want to torture her. I've been crying over it lately, and I got an hour of sleep both last night and the night before, when I realized it was getting worse. I wouldn't have suspected Anorexia if she hadn't done it before. The first time she told me about it, but she never tells me anything anymore. She wears hoodies almost every day, and they're usually pretty baggy. I've heard that's what people with that disorder do, they wear baggy clothes and are really sensitive. She's always telling me she's fat, and how she wished she was as skinny as I am. She's skinnier than me by far, though. So it doesn't really make sense to me what could be going on if it's not anorexia.
Did I do the right thing?
Should I apologize?
Am I total bitch for 'betraying' her and telling the counselor?

Ughh. I'm confused.

This is in my blog, too, so hopefully I'll get some feedback between this and that.
She said she feels angry and betrayed, and she doesn't even want to talk to me anymore. She said she was just using words she shouldn't have when she was talking about the suicide, but she was talking about drowning and jumping off of buildings. "Going splat". So I don't think it was just in a joking manner or anything.

Tiberius
April 20th, 2010, 07:17 PM
R&D :arrow: F&F

Doll
April 20th, 2010, 08:04 PM
Oh, thanks. I remembered there was a forum for this stuff, I just forgot which one ^^;

INFERNO
April 20th, 2010, 10:45 PM
I think you may have helped your friend despite making her feel bad and possibly embarassed, as well as straining your relationship. If her parents did not know of what she was doing, they do now and can help get her the proper therapy she needs. If they did know, it's a sign to do more and therapy is needed if it's not being done already.

Her feeling angry and betrayed seems fairly rational because there was an implicit bond not to tell others but you violated it. Despite that, it's somewhat paradoxical because the more you stay true to your word, the worse your friend gets. So it's a toss-up on that as to which you value more. I'd think that your friend would get over what you did but if not and if you still want to be her friend, then try to re-establish contact without mentioning her looks or self-harm.

Kahn
April 21st, 2010, 09:48 PM
Do not feel anger towards yourself. You did the right thing, something your friend should've done a long time ago. People need help for this sort of stuff and telling an adult what your friend is going through is going in the right direction. Now all you need to do is stick by your friend no matter what. She'll need it, trust me.

Your counselor will be there for your friend now, and that is something good. You brought to light what has been going on and now your friend is going to get help. She may not like it at first, but over time I am sure she will thank you for what you did. You might've saved her life.

Hope this helps.

~Adam

Doll
April 22nd, 2010, 03:25 PM
Thanks. I feel better now, and she's talking to me again. Apparently her mom thinks that I'm odd and that I'm a bad influence. o_o I was just trying to help... Oh well. She still insists that none of it's true, and I don't think she'll talk about it. But I guess it made her realize that we take it seriously. I don't think she really does. Not the affects of it, anyway.