I always screw things up...

[Rogue27]

I always do the same thing over and over. I always take thing to the extreme and I rly don't mean to. I don't even know that I do. Like I always annoy people, and then I do something stupid that makes them dislike me. It's a cycle and it's killing me. My mom always screams at me for this because she doesn't understand that I can't help it. Alot of things have happened to me which I think makes me socially inept. And I accept this but I don't know what to do. Please help me.

[Nickk XD]

What has happened to you to make you socially "inept"?

[Rogue27]

I don't want to say, but I'm fairly smart and I see it, I just want to know how I can change and not screw my friendships up.

[Nickk XD]

It's a personality thing.

That's like asking a smart person not to be smart...it isn't gonna happen.

It's who you are. All I can say is think before you act. I do this all the time...I make dumb comments and then sometimes suffer...

So just think first?

[Aspiringanonymous]

One can consider personality as part of one's nature, but nature can be bent in some degree to rational will, with experience and learned strength. It is a tedious process, but for those who are intent and genuine, it can certainly be worthwhile.

The first step to overcoming anything is to be fully aware of it. Every time you are reacting to a situation in an undesirable way, rather than become carried away by the experience, step back and make a mental note: "this is the situation. And this is my reaction. Now, this is not how I wish to be." One may not be able to control certain aspects of their behaviour at first, especially if it has become deeply ingrained and taken for granted unconsciously. Bringing these to the attention of the conscious, and thus rational mind, is a place to begin.

The external environment and its influences often do have a substantial amount of power over an individual's being, and thus I believe that usually the most efficient approach is to first address the sources which perpetuate feelings of inadequacy - not isolated incidents; perhaps an element of your life, which causes you to feel inept first of all, in turn manifesting into the reality of social incompetence and the actions on your behalf which contribute to that. Does that make sense?

Humans are creatures of habit, and change in any form, whether welcomed or not, is often difficult, and requires much time to gradually adjust to. But you are willing to strive towards a better state - and that's the most important thing, keeping that spirit up. Many things in life are a process of trial and error, and one is largely responsible for figuring out the most suitable approach for oneself - what had been effective for another, may not be for you, since everyone's situation is somewhat different.

Hope this has helped somewhat - and all the best to you.

[Anonim]

just think before you do or say something. you also need to relax and to take everything like a feather takes it while it's floating in the air.. after all, those people aren't worth it if they don't accept who you are and if they don't help you