Wondering...

[mRojas2000]

I was wondering this:

where in your body do you guys cut yourselves??
in what place of the house??
with what??
what do you do with the blood??
do you only do it when you are at home all alone??
what if someone sees you??
sometimes when i read this threads, i feel scared of thinking about people that cut themselves... even tho sometimes ive felt like doing it (even tho i havent done it) it just scares me... did you feel this way when you started cutting??

thanks... if i have any other question, ill post it in this thread...

Miguel

[Guru Guy]

*Ok this might be tirggering*






I usually cut myself in the bathroom where there are mirrors :) Often I'll need to do it when I don't have a chance in which case I will always do it when I get back. Luckily it isn't as strong by then otherwise I'd have a few more or those long thick pink scars than I do now (most are just the little white ones).

I started using a pair of scissors that hap a tip bent slightly inward. I would dig in with the tip and scratch with the point of the scissors; the bent tip would make a small cut. The best part was that I got to press as hard as I wanted because I didn't have to worry about going too deep. The scratching is great because it causes the skin to welt up. The skins gets an aggitated red, and when you scrunch over the scratch gets really pale and the skin gets even more red. Now I use a sharp razor. I like how the skin seperates from itself and how the blood forms in the cut. First it forms in an even red line, but then it starts forming very small beds along the cut. A couple of them will get large enough to form in drops and roll down my stomach to my waistband. I just watch them go. The deeper cuts are kind of gross to look at because the exposed skin is a nasty pale fleshy color. It's also more of a bother to keep them closed. I cut on my chest so sometimes the seatbelt is irritating too.

Yes I make sure I'm alone, but other people can be home. It is either at night when other people are sleeping or when they are otherwise preoccupied unawares. I do prefer to do it when I am home alone though so I can savor it for longer and even leave the bathroom and walk around with them for a little while.

Don't worry, no one sees me. No one has seen my scars either. Although I do often think about what people would do if they saw me. Specifically I laugh when I imagine the look on their faces if they saw my chest. Seeing their eyes focused on my chest with a look of confusion that turns into fear/disgust/whatever as they realize the only possibilty is that I did this to myself. If you've seen a cutting board, you'll have a pretty good idea of what my chest looks like. A lot of straight marks going in many different directions all overlapping each other. They're all varied in length and depth: short shallow ones, a good number of medium and more distinct markes, then there's those few longer and deeper ones that you can tell really made their mark in the thing.

I had never even thought about cutting when I started. I really don't know what I was thinking or how I even came up with it. I used the scissors to make 3 scratches, no blood. I took a shower and went to bed, making sure to squirm to aggravate them a bit. It was amazing when not long after I felt much better, even back to normal. Next time I felt the same way it worked again. I couldn't stop thinking about how weird and confusing it was - I was thinkging the samething any non-cutter was thinking - this is crazy behavior. I don't get it, where the heck did this come from, why am I doing this? At the same time though it was working and after a few quick scratches I felt calm.

[mRojas2000]

I will edit my questions... what i mean with where, i mean, in what part of your body, but also where in the house would be nice...

[~Cookie~]

I cut on my forarm.And I do it eather in my bedroom or in the bath.I do it where theres no chance I will get caught.

[Barelythere]

where on me?
i cut on my left arm mostly, ont the forearm, my lbow area and upper arm and my wrist, so i guess all over that arm :P erm i also cut my right arm by my elbow and randomly plus upper arm, i cut my belly to, and my hips, there easy to cover ive ct my face before as well and the bottom of my foot, ive cut the top of my leg alot as well but i aint done there in yrs
where in the house?
my bedroom mostly, or the bathroom
whith what?
i cut with a razor or a craft knife, but they lose there sharpness quick so i gotta nick them from the art department :P they got 100's of them
what do you do with the blood?? let it bleed wipe it up then clean my cuts and butterfly is nesseary
do you only do it when you are at home all alone??
when im alone or not i do it when i feel the need to, im always in my room tho, so im alone mostly, but ppl do walk in, gotta keep it all hidden when im doin it
what if someone sees you??
my moms walked in and i never saw her come in, damn headfones :P but i just covered up my arms reli quickly and as slyliy as i could i moved things out of sight

sometimes when i read this threads, i feel scared of thinking about people that cut themselves... even tho sometimes ive felt like doing it (even tho i havent done it) it just scares me... did you feel this way when you started cutting??
scared? no i was angry and upset and i didnt no what to do with these feeling so i started taking it out on myself, i didnt event think about cutting i started scratching pinching biting hitting myself, i was smaller, it did make me feel so much better tho, it was a relief, and it still does
hope that answered your questions:D cya x