clovermcm
March 18th, 2010, 03:18 PM
Hey guys, I'm new as of yesterday, and i wanted to share a few songs I wrote here. Critiquing's great, any advice is appreciated.
..here goes something.
Dark Eyes
Those spies,
you could see all their lies
the moment their dark eyes
were upon you.
You're the only light
in this fortress
and surprise surprise
your sixth sense
whispers the truth.
But you shut it out for a second.
And little do you know,
that they've planned it all out
you will scream, cry, and shout,
the whole way through their little show.
Countdown.
tick tock tick tock tick tock.
Hushed crowd.
The whispers, the whispers.
You feel it now,
it's rushing and rushing down.
Boom. It's here.
Put on a straight face,
it's time for the show.
You're in the spot light,
deep breath and go.
Countdown to start-up,
keep holding that note.
Grand Finale, Curtain call,
Now run.
It's on the beginning,
and they're already winning.
They threw you in the lead
when they knew you were not ready.
What happened to your fortress
of invincible power?
Of course it must show up
now or later.
Those critics they're laughing, they're laughing
straight at you.
How ironic; they wrote all those
songs for you.
Your sixth sense was right,
and now you've gotta fight
before you forget that you are
The only Light.
Figure it out, out
out out.
Think you've got it?
Make a plan-plan
Plan it out.
You'll feel it now,
rushing and rushing down.
Boom.
Let's Go.
Put on a straight face,
it's time for the show.
You're in the spot light,
deep breath and go.
Countdown to start-up,
keep holding that note.
Grand Finale, Curtain call,
Put on a straight face,
it's time for the show.
You're in the spot light,
deep breath and go.
Countdown to start-up,
keep holding that note.
Grand Finale, Curtain call
Have some fun.
Welcome back to the real world,
little miss One-Hit-Wonder.
They took you and spat you
straight out again.
You know you deserve to
gain back your thunder.
So why wait? Write a better song.
And hear them sing along.
In vain.
The kicking and screaming...
drowning out the laughter.
The kicking aand screaming....
is coming on faster.
The kicking and screaming...
now their own disaster.
No!
It's your time to shine.
Put on a straight face,
it's time for the show.
You're in the spot light,
deep breath and go.
Countdown to start-up,
keep holding that note.
Grand Finale, Curtain call,
*The look on their faces
is something to see.
Get ready for payback,
you're finally free!
Shout it all out,
for you are to be...*
(The One)
Do it all over again,
but by yourself this time.
See them gasp in punishment
for their lethal crime.
Give it all you've got,
Dark Eyes'll stay away
from you this time.
And you'll remain The Light.
And you'll remain The Light.
You'll remain The Light,
Forevermore.
This one's not done yet...
Call Me Cliche
If you call me cliche
it will make my day
in a fore-warned
filthy suckish way.
If you call me cliche,
you'll get more than
ten faces, smile at you
in pity.
Here I am,
you a fan?
I don't think like
that anyway,
You've already forgotten...
Apparently I'm cliche.
No I'm not.
I say what's on my mind
and prance about in cowgirl boots.
I'm not that tempted to run away
or feel insane
in the presense of booze.
I'm induvidual,
here's a visual
diagram, please refer
to "A."
I'm pointing you
straight to
my motto carved
into the wall.
Guess what it'll say?
Here I am,
once hundred percent
me with the exception of those
heavy lies, I'm not surprised to see
You made at me
cause I screwed up everything
and now I'll nod and bow
I think I'll change
that motto now.
And this...
Playing with Irony
The irony it kills me,
yet somehow still thrills me
whenever I get that adrenaline rush.
The shivers start in my knees,
god help, won't you please?
I can't let the irony,
stab too far into me.
The person who was my hero
is now the weakest I've ever known.
Came from the top to zero,
the higher you are,
the faster you'll fall.
Why can't I crash down
this Berlin Wall
that life's made for me,
separating,
The World I once knew
from the one that is true
to the things I'm against
from the core of my soul.
I'll keep it up...
and rebel...
Will anyone join me?
It's (far?)too hard to tell.
What do you feel when you
see the faces of those who lost it all?
This is the world, and it's far too real
to let you crawl
away.
Feel the tragic
tale of sorrow
escaping from my mouth.
Do the things that I cannot
do myself.
Help.
The Irony is killing
but thrilling to me.
I'm scared of what might happen
if I slip too far away.
Keep me in the cell,
safe from this hell
of a world I thought I knew.
Why can't I crash down
this Berlin Wall
that life's made for me,
separating,
The World I once knew
from the one that is true
to the things I'm against
from the core of my soul.
I'll keep it up...
and rebel...
Will anyone join me?
It's far too hard to tell.
Why won't I slip away
from something I hate?
Is it because I need to
prove something?
Or help my land?
Guide me, my friends,
don't turn away and pretend
this isn't happening right before
your sorry eyes.
Crash it down, shake my hand
through the cold stone gripping
at my soul.
I feel the need
to break free,
help me please,
Crash it down.
Crash it down.
Crash it down,
and build your own.
Crash it down.
Crash it down,
Build your life
and be known.
I have more, but I think I'll leave it at that for now :]
Thanks!
..here goes something.
Dark Eyes
Those spies,
you could see all their lies
the moment their dark eyes
were upon you.
You're the only light
in this fortress
and surprise surprise
your sixth sense
whispers the truth.
But you shut it out for a second.
And little do you know,
that they've planned it all out
you will scream, cry, and shout,
the whole way through their little show.
Countdown.
tick tock tick tock tick tock.
Hushed crowd.
The whispers, the whispers.
You feel it now,
it's rushing and rushing down.
Boom. It's here.
Put on a straight face,
it's time for the show.
You're in the spot light,
deep breath and go.
Countdown to start-up,
keep holding that note.
Grand Finale, Curtain call,
Now run.
It's on the beginning,
and they're already winning.
They threw you in the lead
when they knew you were not ready.
What happened to your fortress
of invincible power?
Of course it must show up
now or later.
Those critics they're laughing, they're laughing
straight at you.
How ironic; they wrote all those
songs for you.
Your sixth sense was right,
and now you've gotta fight
before you forget that you are
The only Light.
Figure it out, out
out out.
Think you've got it?
Make a plan-plan
Plan it out.
You'll feel it now,
rushing and rushing down.
Boom.
Let's Go.
Put on a straight face,
it's time for the show.
You're in the spot light,
deep breath and go.
Countdown to start-up,
keep holding that note.
Grand Finale, Curtain call,
Put on a straight face,
it's time for the show.
You're in the spot light,
deep breath and go.
Countdown to start-up,
keep holding that note.
Grand Finale, Curtain call
Have some fun.
Welcome back to the real world,
little miss One-Hit-Wonder.
They took you and spat you
straight out again.
You know you deserve to
gain back your thunder.
So why wait? Write a better song.
And hear them sing along.
In vain.
The kicking and screaming...
drowning out the laughter.
The kicking aand screaming....
is coming on faster.
The kicking and screaming...
now their own disaster.
No!
It's your time to shine.
Put on a straight face,
it's time for the show.
You're in the spot light,
deep breath and go.
Countdown to start-up,
keep holding that note.
Grand Finale, Curtain call,
*The look on their faces
is something to see.
Get ready for payback,
you're finally free!
Shout it all out,
for you are to be...*
(The One)
Do it all over again,
but by yourself this time.
See them gasp in punishment
for their lethal crime.
Give it all you've got,
Dark Eyes'll stay away
from you this time.
And you'll remain The Light.
And you'll remain The Light.
You'll remain The Light,
Forevermore.
This one's not done yet...
Call Me Cliche
If you call me cliche
it will make my day
in a fore-warned
filthy suckish way.
If you call me cliche,
you'll get more than
ten faces, smile at you
in pity.
Here I am,
you a fan?
I don't think like
that anyway,
You've already forgotten...
Apparently I'm cliche.
No I'm not.
I say what's on my mind
and prance about in cowgirl boots.
I'm not that tempted to run away
or feel insane
in the presense of booze.
I'm induvidual,
here's a visual
diagram, please refer
to "A."
I'm pointing you
straight to
my motto carved
into the wall.
Guess what it'll say?
Here I am,
once hundred percent
me with the exception of those
heavy lies, I'm not surprised to see
You made at me
cause I screwed up everything
and now I'll nod and bow
I think I'll change
that motto now.
And this...
Playing with Irony
The irony it kills me,
yet somehow still thrills me
whenever I get that adrenaline rush.
The shivers start in my knees,
god help, won't you please?
I can't let the irony,
stab too far into me.
The person who was my hero
is now the weakest I've ever known.
Came from the top to zero,
the higher you are,
the faster you'll fall.
Why can't I crash down
this Berlin Wall
that life's made for me,
separating,
The World I once knew
from the one that is true
to the things I'm against
from the core of my soul.
I'll keep it up...
and rebel...
Will anyone join me?
It's (far?)too hard to tell.
What do you feel when you
see the faces of those who lost it all?
This is the world, and it's far too real
to let you crawl
away.
Feel the tragic
tale of sorrow
escaping from my mouth.
Do the things that I cannot
do myself.
Help.
The Irony is killing
but thrilling to me.
I'm scared of what might happen
if I slip too far away.
Keep me in the cell,
safe from this hell
of a world I thought I knew.
Why can't I crash down
this Berlin Wall
that life's made for me,
separating,
The World I once knew
from the one that is true
to the things I'm against
from the core of my soul.
I'll keep it up...
and rebel...
Will anyone join me?
It's far too hard to tell.
Why won't I slip away
from something I hate?
Is it because I need to
prove something?
Or help my land?
Guide me, my friends,
don't turn away and pretend
this isn't happening right before
your sorry eyes.
Crash it down, shake my hand
through the cold stone gripping
at my soul.
I feel the need
to break free,
help me please,
Crash it down.
Crash it down.
Crash it down,
and build your own.
Crash it down.
Crash it down,
Build your life
and be known.
I have more, but I think I'll leave it at that for now :]
Thanks!