why am I bad with girls?

[Themanwithaplan]

I'm 18 and I havent even kissed a girl let alone had a serious relationship, if my friends ask I just say my last hookup was 14 in england (they know I haven't done much since arriving in america in 2006). I am not repulsive either, I used to be fat at 14-15 but now I'm 5'10-6' and 180ish pounds and I'd say I'm 7/10 in looks and even better in personality, i hear my friends hooking up, having sex etc and It makes me upset and angry. My friends sort of try and help me out and they are probably more confident in me than I am, I don't have trouble talking to girls if they talk to me first but I barely start a convo with a girl I don't know unless Ive drank a lot. IS there anything I can do to improve this? I would love a relationship but even a hookup and a sexual encounter would suit me? how the hell do I do this? What is wrong with me?

[Dannybre]

You just need to wait and find your true love.

[Giles]

Experience is key.
Your first anything with a girl (or guy) is always awkward and always will be for everyone everywhere. Just getting past the first thing is good, after that you slowly start learning things about what to do when and how to do things.

Just try to get some experience with anyone, doesn't particularly have to be anything serious. Even just a quick date. It's all experience.

[KChiChi]

^^he's right. stop being so hard on yourself... just consider yourself the perfect innocent. that means that the first time you actually do get serious, it's triple-time special. also... style up and start talking to girls

[Antares]

Teen Sexuality :arrow: R and D

[Cloud]

they are probably more confident in me than I am,
Fix that, and itll make a world of difference
I don't have trouble talking to girls if they talk to me first but I barely start a convo with a girl I don't know unless Ive drank a lot
yea boozing up to meet a girl probably means it wont last long

just be a bit more confident
put your neck on the line if you really want to find a girl
worse they can do is say no
unless you do it wrong then the worse is a kick to the pills
but whatever

[2D]

Because you're not confident.

That's pretty much it. Although, just because you haven't been in a relationship yet doesn't mean your bad with girls.

[Themanwithaplan]

PROGRESS (yes im that sad)

Well there was a girl when I went out last night at a nightclub who had been in my school since 9th grade but I had never talked to her. We talked about everything almost but nothing happened but I thought it would (obviously we'd both been drinking but we'rent absoutely drunk) but it didn't. None of us made the move, i think if i made a move it woulda worked but I didn't (classic me), but we talked for 2-3 hours or so. Also she got out of a 3 year relationship around a month ago, maybe that's why, shes probably not ready for anything (I'll be honest I was expecting a quick hookup as in kissing more than a relationship if it happened, I barely know her doubt I could go in that deep). Does this experience help me or hurt me you think?

[Kaius]

Well, just because nothing happened doesn't mean it's gone badly. The longer you talk about things like that and get closer to her slowly the more she'll open up to you. It's going to take her a little while to adjust to not being in that relationship, i mean it was 3 years its going to take some time to get over that. But i think the experience has helped you, it shows you don't have to have things happen for it to go all right.

[staying_alive]

The talking experience with that girl was good. She probably didn't want to do anything because of that pesky breakup situation, so don't worry about that. Did you get her number or anything? If you did, and you can keep in touch with her, it'll definitely help you.

As for your wanting to hook up. If you're that desperate to hook up, go to parties. There are trashy girls there and if you're drunk you're a lot more confident (aka one of you is going to make a move). ALWAYS wear a condom, no matter how drunk you are or if you can't get it on or whatever.

If you want a relationship, keep talking to girls. Girls who want relationships want to talk to you. They want to pour their feelings on you and let you ask them questions and engage in conversation. Eventually it'll turn sexual, and that sex will be 10 times better than any hookup.

Good luck!

[Themanwithaplan]

The talking experience with that girl was good. She probably didn't want to do anything because of that pesky breakup situation, so don't worry about that. Did you get her number or anything? If you did, and you can keep in touch with her, it'll definitely help you.

As for your wanting to hook up. If you're that desperate to hook up, go to parties. There are trashy girls there and if you're drunk you're a lot more confident (aka one of you is going to make a move). ALWAYS wear a condom, no matter how drunk you are or if you can't get it on or whatever.

If you want a relationship, keep talking to girls. Girls who want relationships want to talk to you. They want to pour their feelings on you and let you ask them questions and engage in conversation. Eventually it'll turn sexual, and that sex will be 10 times better than any hookup.

Good luck!

yeh i got her number.

[remote control]

you just have to talk to girls/guys and get more comfortable with it. most people suck at first so don't feel bad, besides, some girls/guys think it's cute so u might actualy get lucky with it. just try to start a convo with someone you don't know about anything. if it doesn't work then you move on and learn from it. that's all you need to do.

[INFERNO]

You need to gain confidence and experience with talking to girls. Part of it isn't at all what you say but in what you do (i.e. body language). Being aware of your body language and hers will help quite a lot and it can easily influence her views of you before you've even said a sentence. When her suspicions are confirmed after you say at least one sentence, then it's likely to go very sour. When they see you beat up yourself, that's generally a bigger turn-off.

Talk to someone, even random people, such as while waiting in line. Doesn't matter if they're male or female, just talk. Don't concern yourself if you make yourself look like a fool or if you sweep them off their feet, just talk. One of the goals is to be able to "read" a person via body language, their clothing and such before even hearing a word they say. It's educated guessing so you won't always be right but if you can be aware of this in yourself and others, it helps out the conversation. It can also help with deciding on the content of what to say, how to say it and when to change the topic. Distance between her and you can indicate to the person certain things, although it is culture and context-dependent.