Accepting yourself

[Billy15]

i read a lot of threads on here where guys are proud of who they are and even though their gay they still come out and are accepted by their friends and parents and seem very happy. what i want to know is if you are a guy like me and cant come out and your parents would never accept me being gay and neither would my friends, then how is it possible to accept myself?

Just the word "gay" is not accepted around here so how am I suppose to feel good about myself? how is that possible because right now i dont.

[shikachunin]

First, i think this belongs in teen sexuality 0_o

And second, MY parents probs wouldnt accept me. I know this is said a lot, and you probably won't believe it, but if your friend is a TRUE friend, they will accept you. I have only told 2 friends that i'm gay.

In order to accept yourself, you first need to come to terms with yourself. Accept that you are who you are, and that God/Ala/Buddah/Whoever made you the way you are for a reason, and that everything that happens to you happens for a reason.

EDIT: I reported the post so that it can be placed into the correct section :)

[Baudelaire]

hey billy :) its like I told you before, you have to remember that there are most likely other boys in your community facing the same problem, now you dont have to come out but you could tell a friend, preferably a girl your close to, they tend to understand more. k bye :)

[jimmy mccallum]

wow you are very mature for your age champ. I dont think any gay person is automatically accepted by friends and family, i think that is something that happens over time.

i know were your coming from with the point you made about gays not being accepted were your from, but i do believe coming out is something ayone who feels there gay should do.

i think you have to think about yourself and what makes you happy, if your not willing to come out then you can be affecting your happiness and ultimately your life. This is a decision that you will carry for the rest of you life, and i dont thnk its something you can keep to yourself for the rest of your life to keep everyone else happy.

it will be the hardest thing you have ever done if you do decide to come out and tell your family/friends, but once again this is about you and your happiness and i dont think this is something to be ashamed of or should keep hidden.

im not gay but i have seen it affect someone close to me, and i will admitt when he first told me i was a bit confused and didnt really want to keep hanging around him, but i learnt to understand that it must of been really difficult for him to admitt that, and it did not change the person he was so i learnt to accept him for who he was, and we are still good mates to this day.

im sure your friends and family will accept you if you choose to come out, it wont happen straight away, but i promise you it will.

all the best mate i hope i helped a bit mate, talk to me about it anytime mate

[cody2010]

i agree with everything jimmy said. 100%.

[AJay]

I'm not sure when but I do want to eventually come out publicly about being bi. But we have so many anti-gay Christians here that it's ridiculous. I hope I eventually get used to myself.

[Tiberius]

P101 :arrow: TS

[beedubs]

hey billy :)you just need to accept yourself :) even if your parents dont accept it, they will still love you (i hope). i meen look at what you sig says. accept yourself and you will be happy :) PM me. lots of luck

[ryanmichael]

look ur wat 14 u stil got time to figure it all out and ur from tennesse ur gonna have problems with people. all of us who have said yea im gay have problems but ur gonna have more u just have to deal but dont be in rush figure it out u got time ur gonna lose friends but gain more being gay isnt the end of the world. as for accepting ur self its about how u feel if u think being gay is wrong or something ull soon realize that its perfectl;y normal and wen u do come out ur family will love you

[ACQD139F83J]

who cares about your parents - I have a friend (female) who once said she was bi to her parents and was kicked out for the night even after she said it was a joke. Then the (incorrectly) realised that she was joking and took her back in. Now she has a girlfriend and her parents don't have a clue. If there's no-one around that you can tell, it might be hard but if it's just your parents, don't tell them.

[mustang]

you are what you are and you will be what you want to be. if your friends wont accept you as being gay and being what you are then they arnt very good friends are they.And if you family dont accept you for who you are then there the ones that will regret not accepting you for who you are and loving you for who you are.It shouldnt matter to you friends and family that your gay if they love you like they say they do.i thought my friends and family wouldnt accept me for being gay but the all said thats cool and they still love me the same it doesnt matter who you love aslong as you find love in the right place.

[CuriousDestruction]

look, just because other people can't accept it, doesn't mean it's not okay. it's not about OTHER people accepting you. it's about YOU accepting you. that's the biggest part of coming out. accepting yourself. i know it may be hard to come out to other people at this point. but your parents may surprise you. they love you they may at least accept that you are gay even if they don't support it. also know that if your friends can't accept that you are gay they aren't really your friends. the point of your friends is that they love and support you. i know this is hard, but i also know you can do this and even if you don't come out to anyone else anytime soon you should at least be able to accept yourself and be okay with yourself, now. please PM me if you wanna talk. :)

[mustang]

i forgot to mention you have to beleve in yourself and accept yourself for who you are to give yourself the courage to come out so that others will accept you for waht you are. it helped me.

[beedubs]

Pm me!!

[Billy15]

thanks to all you guys who answered this thread because it does help to hear how other teens feel and thats why i come here because its an awesome place so thanks.

i think i have some real good friends who might not hate me if i told them that i thought i was gay (especially two) but the problem is we live in tennessee and this is the middle of the baptist bible belt and around here being gay is a huge sin and perverted. even if my friends wanted to accept me they wouldn't be allowed to hang with me because there parents (and it would get around) would think i was trying to make their kid gay and if not that, they would think by hanging with me that others would think that they were gay to and thats just how it is around here.

I dont believe its a sin and i like myself and want to accept myself but some places are easier to do that then others and around here its almost impossible if you want friends. besides my dad is a contractor and once that got out in this small town it might affect his business and if not i know he would be ashamed of me and the same for my mom. the only one ive told is my little brother because we are so close and trust each other but he is only 10 and even he told me not to tell anyone else because he knows what would happen.

[nick]

It sounds like you may need to keep it to yourself at least until you are able to leave home. Its great that you realise its not a sin and dont dislike yourself. It must be really frustrating for you to be trapped in this situation, but if you can accept what you are and be happy with it in yourself then hopefully you will be able to get through.

Best wishes.

[DrkZ90]

i read a lot of threads on here where guys are proud of who they are and even though their gay they still come out and are accepted by their friends and parents and seem very happy. what i want to know is if you are a guy like me and cant come out and your parents would never accept me being gay and neither would my friends, then how is it possible to accept myself?

Just the word "gay" is not accepted around here so how am I suppose to feel good about myself? how is that possible because right now i dont.

I think that, first of all, you'll need to accept yourself, before telling anyone else... don't expect others to accept it if you can't accept yourself for who you are...

I'd say that accepting yourself can be the hardest thing to do, because honestly, given the homophobic world we all (sadly) live in, nobody would willingly choose to be gay...

[manlymadness]

Yaa I accept my self but I haven't come out and if your friend can't accept you you can't call them friends and rise above become succesful becuase there nothing more irrating to homphobe people than a succesful 1 and a if they can't accept you we still do and we are your friends and support you!!

[Inconvenience]

u must accept urself if u want others to accept u. and if they are true friends, they have to accept u whoever u are, that's what friendship's called

[jojo11282]

i think even though this post is over and crap that some people are perverted and act like they are excepted but really only want simpathy and all that gud stufff that people so desperaely crave on here

[Aspiringanonymous]

I'm not sure what you were trying to say with that message, but desiring sympathy has nothing to do with being perverted.

Please don't post in threads more than one month old. :locked: