2D
February 2nd, 2010, 12:20 PM
That feeling you get when you take a shower. It is such a dull and simple task for most people. But for me it is a adventure of which the likes you will never understand.
I always underestimate how hot I want the water to be, so I always step into a frigid wonderland full of malevolent water molecules. Don’t get me wrong, it isn’t unpleasant to step into a cold shower, it is merely shocking to the senses. Now I face the first of many difficult decisions, do I turn the heat up or leave it where it is at. More often than not I decided to turn it up to a nice warm shower, not hot though. if I have just exercised a lot or it is summer I usually like to take cold shower, I shall explain the adventures of that in a summer post. so, as I’m soaking in this fantastic bombardment of water I ponder my next decision.
Do I wash my body first or my hair first? Don’t scoff at me you weasel, this is a decision that could shape the rest of my day! They both have there advantages and disadvantages.
Hair: advantages.
* What shampoo is not used on your hair will drip down a do a sub-par job of washing your body.
* Your hair gets washed first. And who doesn’t like clean hair sooner?
* The hair faeries are pleased with you and if you do it enough you may gain 97832 experience points and possibly 9000 Internets.
Hair: disadvantages.
* The rest of your body feels left out and that is never good.
* You may not feel the need to wash your body, that will bite you in the ass later in the day guaranteed.
* The body elves are less capable to defend you against the trolls that want to troll your body.
Body: advantages.
* The elves are prepared.
* Your body is clean, which means more surface area done, and if you’re in a hurry and can’t do your hair that’s what matters.
Body: disadvantages.
* Your hair faeries are pissed off and might riot causing dandruff.
* You don’t get the added benefit of getting your body sup-par washed by shampoo, so it is harder to get completely clean
So you see? This is a terribly difficult decision that should not be taken lightly. It has repercussions that could influence your entire day! And we’re just getting started!
The next difficult decision is whether to use liquid body soap or bar soap. This gets into how well your body elves take each kind of soap. You need to find out which they prefer. To do this you wash one side of your body with bar soap and the other with liquid soap. Then you go out during a full moon and see which half of your body is brighter. For me it just happens to be liquid soap.
Next you must decide if you’re going to use conditioner or not. Now a common misconception is that hair faeries love conditioner. This is not always the case, you must also figure out which brand your faeries like. I am lucky to have faeries that don’t really mind which kind, although they do prefer Suave conditioner they will take kindly to most kinds. Going without conditioner is equally as healthy because it makes the faeries work harder, and nobody wants lazy slobs for hair faeries.
So now do you see how difficult a shower is? Take that into account next time you take one.
Don't mind me, just being an oddball.
I always underestimate how hot I want the water to be, so I always step into a frigid wonderland full of malevolent water molecules. Don’t get me wrong, it isn’t unpleasant to step into a cold shower, it is merely shocking to the senses. Now I face the first of many difficult decisions, do I turn the heat up or leave it where it is at. More often than not I decided to turn it up to a nice warm shower, not hot though. if I have just exercised a lot or it is summer I usually like to take cold shower, I shall explain the adventures of that in a summer post. so, as I’m soaking in this fantastic bombardment of water I ponder my next decision.
Do I wash my body first or my hair first? Don’t scoff at me you weasel, this is a decision that could shape the rest of my day! They both have there advantages and disadvantages.
Hair: advantages.
* What shampoo is not used on your hair will drip down a do a sub-par job of washing your body.
* Your hair gets washed first. And who doesn’t like clean hair sooner?
* The hair faeries are pleased with you and if you do it enough you may gain 97832 experience points and possibly 9000 Internets.
Hair: disadvantages.
* The rest of your body feels left out and that is never good.
* You may not feel the need to wash your body, that will bite you in the ass later in the day guaranteed.
* The body elves are less capable to defend you against the trolls that want to troll your body.
Body: advantages.
* The elves are prepared.
* Your body is clean, which means more surface area done, and if you’re in a hurry and can’t do your hair that’s what matters.
Body: disadvantages.
* Your hair faeries are pissed off and might riot causing dandruff.
* You don’t get the added benefit of getting your body sup-par washed by shampoo, so it is harder to get completely clean
So you see? This is a terribly difficult decision that should not be taken lightly. It has repercussions that could influence your entire day! And we’re just getting started!
The next difficult decision is whether to use liquid body soap or bar soap. This gets into how well your body elves take each kind of soap. You need to find out which they prefer. To do this you wash one side of your body with bar soap and the other with liquid soap. Then you go out during a full moon and see which half of your body is brighter. For me it just happens to be liquid soap.
Next you must decide if you’re going to use conditioner or not. Now a common misconception is that hair faeries love conditioner. This is not always the case, you must also figure out which brand your faeries like. I am lucky to have faeries that don’t really mind which kind, although they do prefer Suave conditioner they will take kindly to most kinds. Going without conditioner is equally as healthy because it makes the faeries work harder, and nobody wants lazy slobs for hair faeries.
So now do you see how difficult a shower is? Take that into account next time you take one.
Don't mind me, just being an oddball.