Yay i can see depression coming to me

[NVerson]

Im so frustrated
well i have been for a year now but right now im frustrated more than ever

before i start im bi-curious and a christian
so today i was having dinner with my parents as usual and i was talking about this and that and i felt like asking my parents
how they feel about gay people
i told them that two gay men were hanged in iran few yrs ago(i donno if its few yrs ago but thats not the point)
my moms response was just shocking. She said "well thats a good decision they made"
i mean seriously? killing someone for being gay is a good decision?
So i told them that i think gay people are perfectly fine people and that they shouldnt be saying any anti-gay quotes without really knowing about them.
My mom was like "oh yeah? Did you even know what gay people do? They have anal sex! So you thinks thats ok?"
i told them i am ok with them doing that.
Since then my mom went crazy telling me about aids, what bible says(it was like her own interpretation), and so on.
I told them that was their thoughts and that i simply dont care( i do care. I mean im bi-curious) and that i will support gay people when i grow up.

"Do something more valuable. Other than wasting ur time on those people" thats what they said

after this conversation i felt miserable and deeply frustrated. I always believed that if i finally get to know who i really am (gay or bi or str8), i could tell
my parents and that they will support me.

Now i know that that won't happen. And i know i will not take any risk by telling them that im curious. I have no one i can really talk to. I knew my friends were homophobes. But it hurts much more to find out that my parents were.

I just wanna hide. Hide in a place where no one can see me. I was lucky not to have any knives around me. I could have cut my self. I still feel like doing so but i know its wrong choice to make. Feeling alone in my own confusing world, i can see depression coming toward me. And my parents had just opened the last door for it to come in.




English isnt my first language. Sorry about my english.

[Golddron]

It seems like they would be a little bit more encouraging. But it is up to parents to share their values with you. And please don't cut. please

[BiBoy13]

I know it's hard but I'm sure your parents would be ok with you being gay/bi as, afterall,you are their son and they love and care about you. As said above, please don't cut!

[CuriousDestruction]

your parents seem to love you. i think they might be a little freaked out that you suddenly are so outspoken about gays, which i admire btw, but they still love you. i'm sorry your mom is freaking out about it though. my dad would shoot me if he knew i was bi-curious. please don't cut yourself. it's not worth it and it'll only make a bad situation worse. and if you don't like the fact that your parents are homophobes find some new friends, no need to hang out with bigots, no offense. PM me if you wanna talk.

[Icarus7]

Im so frustrated
well i have been for a year now but right now im frustrated more than ever

before i start im bi-curious and a christian..

...after this conversation i felt miserable and deeply frustrated. I always believed that if i finally get to know who i really am (gay or bi or str8), i could tell
my parents and that they will support me.

Now i know that that won't happen. And i know i will not take any risk by telling them that im curious. I have no one i can really talk to. I knew my friends were homophobes. But it hurts much more to find out that my parents were.

I just wanna hide. Hide in a place where no one can see me. I was lucky not to have any knives around me. I could have cut my self. I still feel like doing so but i know its wrong choice to make. Feeling alone in my own confusing world, i can see depression coming toward me. And my parents had just opened the last door for it to come in.



Hey i know what you feel... i have been there, but having conservative parents and living in a conservative country doesnt mean that one cannot talk to other people... world is confusing but there are nice people there that can help and be a good support too... Try to find new friends who are bi/gay in your city :) it seems there are a lot of friendly users here in the forum:D if you need someone to talk just pm me ;) and do try anything like cutting yourself. that doesnt solve the confusions...only put things even worse :eek:

[NVerson]

Hey i know what you feel... i have been there, but having conservative parents and living in a conservative country doesnt mean that one cannot talk to other people... world is confusing but there are nice people there that can help and be a good support too... Try to find new friends who are bi/gay in your city :) it seems there are a lot of friendly users here in the forum:D if you need someone to talk just pm me ;) and do try anything like cutting yourself. that doesnt solve the confusions...only put things even worse :eek:

your parents seem to love you. i think they might be a little freaked out that you suddenly are so outspoken about gays, which i admire btw, but they still love you. i'm sorry your mom is freaking out about it though. my dad would shoot me if he knew i was bi-curious. please don't cut yourself. it's not worth it and it'll only make a bad situation worse. and if you don't like the fact that your parents are homophobes find some new friends, no need to hang out with bigots, no offense. PM me if you wanna talk.

I know it's hard but I'm sure your parents would be ok with you being gay/bi as, afterall,you are their son and they love and care about you. As said above, please don't cut!

It seems like they would be a little bit more encouraging. But it is up to parents to share their values with you. And please don't cut. please

Thank you guys. I hope everyone around me is open minded as you guys are.
And no im notmcutting myself:) Thx again

[Scarface]

listen i'm gay and i am proud of the decision that i made. i have a very homophobic family and it has been very hard to keep it from them my father once said that if i was gay then he told me he would kill me then he would kill himself . please don't cut it won't help thank you for coming here for help im here if you need someone to talk to

[Lazy Procrastinator]

A couple of things hear:

1. If your friends do not support your lifestyle choice, or support you throughout your troubling times which seems like now, they are not your friends. Why would you want non-supporting non-sympathetic people around you who will constantly criticize you for your emotions. Find some friends who believe that what you do is your own choice because they will be the ones who will be there for you in times of need.
2. Your parents obviously love you, they love you so much that they think in their own world that they are protecting you from the enemies of their values and attitudes (values being their beliefs and what they live by eg. Religion, attitudes being their beliefs and their attitudes towards things like gays are abnormal). Since your parents are Christians who believe that being gay is a sin, they think by dis-encouraging the notion by which gay people live (eg. trying to scare you with anal-sex, or that they may not reproduce) that they will save you in the eye of god. Your parents are not bad people, but if you continue to listen to their criticism about gays and such; then you are not helping your situation, it is good that you said you don't care what your parents think, but I encourage you to find an adult who WILL encourage and talk seriously about your current situation.
3. Thank-god their are kids out there not brainwashed by their parents slander.

[Asylum]

i'm sorry about your parents... i know it can be hard... just hang in thre.. if you tell your parents they will be in shock.. not to mention they might even try to "save your soul"... because of their own beliefs, but no matter what they will always love you... perhaps their reason fr saying those nasty things is because they care.... i know it doens't sound like it but.. think of it this way.. they don't want you "wasting your time with homosexuals", because they are in fear it might influience you, and they love you and don't want that... hwoever they realy must hehe i'll qoute a christian prayer, "accept the things they can not change, change the things they can, and have the wisdom to know the difference. " it's up to you or not to tell them.. and if you evr have any problems or just want to rant or tlak or whatever you can PM me anytime, i know its hard hun, just hang in there.

[lengthy_brochure]

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[Kahn]

Brian. All I can say is hope for the best, but approach the situation with a positive attitude. Not everyone will be open minded, and you need to realize this because if you don't it will seem a lot worse than it already is.

As for your parents, just because they are Christian doesn't mean they are necessarily going to shoot you down and disown you. Keep your hopes high, and confront them when they are going through a good time, or are in a good mood. When you feel it is right is the right time, and none of us can decide that for you.

Don't make this depressing, because many other people have gone through this. Ask for people to share their experiences with you, and try to get more advice from them on how to handle this.

Good luck.

~Adam