When I was 7...

[munchausen]

When I was seven years old I had a best friend, he was older than me and we were pretty much inseperable. Well I was never a popular kid in school I was the quiet guy who sat in the corner and kept to himself and I got bullied a lot because of it. On this occasion He asked me to play in the bushes, -We played in there a lot so I didn't find it weird- and when I jumped in before him I saw one of the other older kids who bullied me but I guess I didn't run because I thought steven would help me. I was dead wrong, steven was there to block me in. Did you know in the UK that if there is no forced penetration it counts as sexual assault, not rape?
I wasn't sexually assaulted. I don't remember much of the actual event but I remember the feeling afterwards, the complete numbness and disbelief. For days I didn't sleep or eat or even look at anyone else. I never spoke out because I was too afraid, I didn't have any idea how to explain anyway. This isn't the only reason I cut, there were other instances of abuse.

[Kahn]

So many people have this same problem. I am sorry to here even your own best friend, a possible refuge for this sort of thing, aided with this.. It is sad when the world is a sick place. You need to speak out, let your feelings out. To your parents. Someone needs to pay for this. This "friend" especially. He should've looked out for you, yet he didn't.

I cannot do anything. You are the one sitting behind the drivers wheel. You need to do something about it, and when you do you will feel renewed. Trust me.

[thrust of trust]

i agree adam. talk this off your chest. speak out and let someone know what happened. you can get help, you dont have to keep this bottled in.

[CuriousDestruction]

i agree with adam and jay. the sooner you start talking to people about this, the sooner you start to heal from it. i'm not familiar with the laws on this in the UK so i don't know if the kid can be punished. however i know that you should definitely let a counselor or therapist know. they can help you.

[munchausen]

definitely let a counselor or therapist know. they can help you.
I know it may seem a little stubborn but I have no intention of talking to a complete stranger about my problems. At least not yet anyways.

[Asylum]

i agree with the above, but you must do it when you are ready. perhpas tlaking to a counsler about it when you are ready is the best, because they can hel;p you deal with it.

[Kahn]

Don't talk to a complete stranger. Talk to your PARENTS. They will listen. My mother has listened to me before, and resolved an issue with my brother hitting me repeatedly with a shovel. It is a matter of communication for you. You are the one that has to reach out.

[munchausen]

Don't talk to a complete stranger. Talk to your PARENTS. They will listen. My mother has listened to me before, and resolved an issue with my brother hitting me repeatedly with a shovel. It is a matter of communication for you. You are the one that has to reach out.
My parents aren't the helpful loving kind my dad's the "it's just another excuse to hit you" kind and my mom's the "oh god it's my fault it happened" kind.

[Inconvenience]

dude, i'm really sorry what happen to u and u know what? u've gotta go and kick their asses ;) this is what i would do. u are a man. hitch up a bunch of ur friends, go and kick their asses ;)
btw, how old're ya?

[munchausen]

I'm 16, so you're advice is to break into a prison to kick the crap out of a guy?

[Inconvenience]

I'm 16, so you're advice is to break into a prison to kick the crap out of a guy?

so he's imprisoned? that already makes sense. even though i'd wait the day he came out ;)

u don't know what i was going through at ur age :)

one more advice, never bow in from of anyone, especially in front of bullies ;)

[Kahn]

My parents aren't the helpful loving kind my dad's the "it's just another excuse to hit you" kind and my mom's the "oh god it's my fault it happened" kind.

No one's parent's are really the "Helpful loving kind". My Dad has hit me before, same as my brother. My Mom is an alcoholic. My Dad doesn't talk to me. At least they dealt with this. I would go to your Mom, and if you don't talk to your parents then talk to a teacher or trusted adult. You want help but you aren't striving to get it.

[Brighter.Tomorrow]

My parents aren't the helpful loving kind my dad's the "it's just another excuse to hit you" kind and my mom's the "oh god it's my fault it happened" kind.

Maybe they CAN help though, parents can help where you think theyre the most useless.

[munchausen]

so he's imprisoned? that already makes sense. even though i'd wait the day he came out ;)

u don't know what i was going through at ur age :)

one more advice, never bow in from of anyone, especially in front of bullies ;)

lol, I don't get bullied anymore I'm a second dan in shotokan karate and it's pretty common knowledge in my area.

[Permanence]

Ok so you want help with this, but you are not willing to talk to your parents, nor are you willing to confide in someone you don't know. That really leaves you no options. The best you can do is tell a friend but that isn't going to get you any kind of justice for this, just a little relief.

In regards to whether or not it's sexual assault, yes I believe it is. Your post is quite vague and does not say exactly what has happened so I will just post my understanding of the laws in your area. All sexual touching without penetration is considered sexual assault. Recently the Sexual Offences Act was updated to include oral sex as a form of rape - did this happen to you? Whether this amendment to the act is retrospective, I'm not sure. I am also not sure whether it matters what age he was at the time, all I can think of is that it would alter his sentence.

[munchausen]

Ok so you want help with this, but you are not willing to talk to your parents, nor are you willing to confide in someone you don't know. That really leaves you no options. The best you can do is tell a friend but that isn't going to get you any kind of justice for this, just a little relief.

In regards to whether or not it's sexual assault, yes I believe it is. Your post is quite vague and does not say exactly what has happened so I will just post my understanding of the laws in your area. All sexual touching without penetration is considered sexual assault. Recently the Sexual Offences Act was updated to include oral sex as a form of rape - did this happen to you? Whether this amendment to the act is retrospective, I'm not sure. I am also not sure whether it matters what age he was at the time, all I can think of is that it would alter his sentence.

I suppose I should have clarified I wasn't asking for help or anything I was just getting it off of my chest, and I was trying to say there was penetration without actually saying it so... yeah.

[Permanence]

So I'm not sure why you asked about the laws?

[munchausen]

So I'm not sure why you asked about the laws?

I didn't ask about the laws I stated them hence the "did you know?" part.

[Mattasaur94]

So many people have this same problem. I am sorry to here even your own best friend, a possible refuge for this sort of thing, aided with this.. It is sad when the world is a sick place. You need to speak out, let your feelings out. To your parents. Someone needs to pay for this. This "friend" especially. He should've looked out for you, yet he didn't.

I cannot do anything. You are the one sitting behind the drivers wheel. You need to do something about it, and when you do you will feel renewed. Trust me.


I agree, completely. We can only sit here in a passenger's seat (from an anological point of view), we can only be here to help. I agree with everyone else, the best thing you can do is talka bout it, whilst it might be incredibly hard, it will help you. You've taken the first step, and I congratulate you on that.
*nods*
We're all here for you if you need to talk about absolutely anything. VT is an amazing forum, i think its one of the best things that teen's and people can have.