Should I tell him the truth?

[MMVM_Kaputt]

God I am so stupid, my avatar on IMVU is a guy (I feel more like a guy than a girl anyway) and my orientation states "gay" For the record I do feel like a gay male in a straight girls body and believe me it sucks.

Anyway, I got talking to this guy called Tom...got his MSN ect ect...I never meant to lie to him but I didnt know how to tell him I'm actually a girl...even though he's bi...He is an amazing guy, and especially as I've never been in a relationship before. I never expected to fall in love with him, I never expected him to say he loves me...and I never expected to agree to meet up with him in the summer. I told him I live in Wales, just as a precaution when he asked me where I live...I really live in England but thats actually not important.
I've lied to him alot, to back up my original stories and now I feel guiltier and guiltier every single bloody time I talk to him. Especially when he tells me I'm awesome and the nicest guy he's ever spoken to ect...I've been playing the cute, innocent naive boy that I've always been so desperate to be...because thats who I am inside...He put as his MSN status that summer would be the time of change for him, he says that he misses me when we don't talk...
I know I'll have to tell him eventually, though I've considered setting up another account as a girl and talking to him ect...but I'm just scared...I've been so desperate for someone to love me, for so long and now I have that someone I'm scared that he will hate me... I need advice...?

Oh and please dont tell me I'm stupid, or anything because I know that :(

[maddii-may]

take in too consideation i fyou tell him the truth it might hurt your friend ship but he needs to no the truth personally i would

[MMVM_Kaputt]

I'm scared of risking our love, though I guess your right...he deserves to know. I love him so much, thats why I need to be honest with him.
How though, how can I tell him?

[maddii-may]

well say you have something to tell himand ask him not to hate you for it and so on ...

[Sapphire]

I can understand why you've held certain things back perfectly. I find that fear can make us do so many stupid things. However, you are doing the right thing by deciding to face the music.

There is never an easy way to come clean to someone about a lie so you just have to come out with it. When you've done that, just explain to him why you did it.

It won't be easy for him to hear and you will have to expect him to need some time to get his head around it all. Hopefully, he won't need long but it is always best to prepare yourself for the worst outcome in situations like this while hoping for a better outcome.

If you can do it honestly (I will admit to not being entirely clear on the difference between the you he knows and the real you), reassure him that you have not pretended to be a completely different person.

Good luck :clover:

[alex95]

jesus christ tell the truth before it gets any worse! The longer you hold it the worst it becomes...

[MMVM_Kaputt]

I can understand why you've held certain things back perfectly. I find that fear can make us do so many stupid things. However, you are doing the right thing by deciding to face the music.

There is never an easy way to come clean to someone about a lie so you just have to come out with it. When you've done that, just explain to him why you did it.

It won't be easy for him to hear and you will have to expect him to need some time to get his head around it all. Hopefully, he won't need long but it is always best to prepare yourself for the worst outcome in situations like this while hoping for a better outcome.

If you can do it honestly (I will admit to not being entirely clear on the difference between the you he knows and the real you), reassure him that you have not pretended to be a completely different person.

Good luck :clover:

Thank you so much for the advice, I know I have to tell the truth...damn I'm sitting here and he is online and I'm deliberately appearing offline because I'm so scared.

The me he knows, is the boy I want to be. Nice, naive, cute, innocent...The real me is a fuck-up, female for a start (though he is bi so I'm hanging onto that for dear life) I'm not naive...
There are similarities though, I have been honest about my age (ish) I said my birthday was in Feb, but it was in December. I guess I'm a nice person, I told him the truth about my liking climbing trees and stuff.

This is one thing I do feel really guilty about though, I got drunk at a party and told him that my mum was dead and I live with my dad...that it was my fault. Then I felt guilty afterwoods for saying it and told him I've never been drunk in my life.

I'm screwed up.

[Sapphire]

Take the plunge. You know you need to do it.
I'm on MSN too atm so if you want some moral support you can add me.