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Englishrose
January 6th, 2010, 08:51 AM
Hey guy, first of all thanks in advance for any advice you can give me.

I recently began dating a guy I've known for quite some time. He is an old friend of my cousin and while I've only known him well for months now, they have been friends for nearly 15 years.

However, he is in the forces, and only returns every other weekend back home while he isn't deployed. We first began to get close several months ago and texted each other constantly, and I have to say, I fancied the pants off him.

This christmas he returned home for three weeks, the longest he has ever been home, and we spent the majority of the christmas holidays together. He asked me out several times, but long distance relationships have never been my sort of relationship. However, I decided that you don't get anything if you don't risk it and I finally said yes to him and we began dating. While he was here, the relationship is one of the best I've ever been in, and he is probably one of the nicest boyfriends I've had in a while, and my feelings are quite strong towards him.

The problem lies in our conversations while he is away from home. During the day, we seem to have normal conversations, what we're up to and the likes, but as soon as it starts getting late, he always seems to want to turn the conversation sexual. Now, this might not be a huge problem, we all have needs right and we are both of legal age, but its the fact that every night without fail, no matter what, he wants to have a sexual conversation.

There is a three year age gap with me being 18 years old (just) and him being 21 and I know that he has more sexual experience than me.

When he is home, sex isn't really a problem, it's always just flirting fun, but things seem to be more serious when he isn't actually around.

I'm asking for advice on what you think I should do. He does get the message when I tell him I'm not in the mood for that sort of conversation and he is always really nice about it, and I would hate to lose him as a boyfriend because of our different sexual needs, but could I have any advice on how to deal with the difference in our sexual needs.

woody92
January 6th, 2010, 09:11 AM
Ok well thats normal. there isnt really anything you can do in my opinion. I think that if he is ok with you saying "sorry i dont want to talk about that right now" then thats a F****** GOOD BF you have there coz most of the people I know arent like that.
If he loves you he will accept that you dont want to talk about it. Maybe if you try to say we can talk sexual 1 or 2 times a week then that might help. But in my opinion he has to hold back abit and you have to talk abit more about it (but thats for alll relationships not just your own) I know its diffrent for me coz i am gay but it still aplyies I have a long distance relationship' with my BF Over 5000 miles! but I dont care coz I know that I love Drew to peices and I would even die to protect him (HONEST). Pm me if you would like and I hope all works out good for you! And welcome to VT!! I hope you like it here!! PM me anytime if you want!