Umm, iv never posted anything like this before

[xrazor_tearsx]

Tbh, I dont even know why I am now, I think I just need to vent, maybe?

Iv just felt really out of control the past few days. After months of not cutting, and before that it was close to a year, iv just been at it several times a day for the past few days.

It's like iv rediscovered the easy way to control my emotions and have a bit of a release I guess. But I know that once the buzz had died, il feel regret and it'll be like a viscious cycle.

Do you ever feel like you should stop, but you just dont want to? I just cant escape it recently, my strength has gone.

Im sorry for my rambling, I dont even know why im posting it, just a distraction I suppose, maybe someone to talk to, to know it's not just me who thinks this way, maybe it is, I dunno. . .

[munchausen]

It's not just you who thinks this way, I'm the exact same I can resist the urge for months at a time and other times not even a single day. I suggest you find a reason to stop, It is like an addiction there's good days and bad days you just have to remember why you're toughing it out.

[xrazor_tearsx]

But what if you feel like you dont want to stop?

[Baudelaire]

I think the problem with self harming people is that they believe they are the cause of their own problems so they feel like they themselves deserve punishment, this is just a guess so correct me if I'm wrong, so heres what I do, make an A list.

Who's your best friend?
What makes you smile?

another alternative would be stress release, express your emotions, let yourself flow, dont be outrageous, but be real, dont keep everything to yourself , let others know how you feel when then say "whats up?" to you, and maybe, take your anger out on something, not SOMEONE, something, like a pillow, or say..maybe a bungee cord hehe, pulling one of those, it never breaks and it helps you use force so thats just a little idea.

[munchausen]

But what if you feel like you dont want to stop?

Then no-one can make you stop, if you're in as deep as you say you're going to have to want it

[VioletAngel]

Do you ever feel like you should stop, but you just dont want to?

I have this all the time at the moment, I hate it because I don't know which half of me to listen to.

Unless you want to quit with everything you've got, you'll find it very hard to do so. You need to find some reason worth stopping for. Or if you really really don't want to stop, noone can make you. It's your choice.

x

[xrazor_tearsx]

I have this all the time at the moment, I hate it because I don't know which half of me to listen to.

Unless you want to quit with everything you've got, you'll find it very hard to do so. You need to find some reason worth stopping for. Or if you really really don't want to stop, noone can make you. It's your choice.

x

Yeah, this is kinda how I am. It's a battle in my head, like I know I should stop, and I know I can? But the other bit of my head is telling me not to, to stay in control.

I have brief moments of clarity where I know im being a dick, but then it's like there's someone else in my head who just soves the sensible person outta the way.