guilty conscience...

[gookmique]

let's cut a long story short - i moved to china one year ago. after roughly 4 months of moving i found a girl. we dated for a little while; i eventually lost my virginity to her. we kind of stopped talking, and eventually only saw each other about once or twice a month. about 3 months ago i met a girl. she's a very nice girl a that. she's kind hearted, always smiling, and very generous. well, we started dating; which is good fun and all. we get along great. how ever there is a flaw with in the relationship. i'm still seeing the previous girl. i feel very bad doing this to such a kind hearted girl, but i can't give up the sex for some reason. i've already came out with it and told my girlfriend that i've slept with another girl behind her back. the odd thing is, she forgave me 100% which in itself just goes to show how great of a person this girl is. i just have a bad feeling i'm going to do it again. another thing; my girlfriend is a virgin which kind of sets me off. i don't want to have to take a girl's virginity, it's really something i just don't find appealing. especially in china, the culture is so bizarre and different. if you take a girl's virginity you essentially just proposed marriage; but i'm too young to marry, i'm only 19...

anyway, my dilemma here is i don't want to break up with this girl, how ever i don't want to give the sex up with this other girl of mine. all in all i have a guilty conscience.

[Maverick]

A guilty conscience is deserved. If you aren't going to be faithful do the right thing and break up with her. You can't have both. Decide what you want and stick with it.

[Erick]

If you love your girlfriend, leave the other chinese girl for good.
Your girlfriend sounds like a very nice girl, she has forgiven you although the thing you did to her is horrible. She can be nice, but (I hope) she is not stupid, so if you want her, your relationship and to be a good person choose:

Sex with the other weird girl that stoped everything with you or the nice girl that loves you and has forgiven you.

If you love her, everything is possible but dont cheat. Dont be a bastard.

[2D]

If all you like about your first/current girlfriend is the sex then that's rather pointless.

Cheating is fucked up.

Pick one based on your feelings and brain, not your dick.

[KaelKaos]

This girl you have now sounds amazing. She loves you, she's faithful to you, and you could be possibly screwing it all up. You need to prioritize. Is it worth loosing your girlfriend over this? She might've forgave you the first time, but she can only stand it for so long.

[Sapphire]

You don't deserve your girlfriend and tbh she is a fool for forgiving you.

Either way, you have to have the self control to stop cheating on her or you have to break up with her.

[Art_dude]

"Pick one based on your feelings and brain, not your dick."

unfortunately most of guy's brains are located in their dick which usually point to the first person who will hop on it :) Something to do with the Y chromosome lol

Long story short; you made a mistake, it was stupid, impulsive and pathetic. I hope I don't need to point out how unhealthy it would be to continue anything with this original girlfriend of yours. And I think we all know that this new friend of yours is naive to forgive you. How about taking a break from relationships for a while to think about what you've done so you'll give your brain a chance to think and your dick to calm down? Some quiet time will give you some the chance to do some introspective research about why you did what you did and what you plan to do with the future.

[gookmique]

You don't deserve your girlfriend


i guess you're right, but then again i'm human; i'm destined for failure and mistake. how ever i guess i want help, that's why i came to this place, that's why i asked you anonymous people for guidance. maybe i really should do some thinking, eh? at least i'm putting forth the effort - haha.

[Sapphire]

i guess you're right, but then again i'm human; i'm destined for failure and mistake. how ever i guess i want help, that's why i came to this place, that's why i asked you anonymous people for guidance. maybe i really should do some thinking, eh? at least i'm putting forth the effort - haha.
Just because humans are flawed doesn't mean that we can all be callous arseholes.
And you don't need help, you just need to make a choice and have the willpower to stick to it.

Btw, asking for opinions isn't putting effort into it. You will be putting forth the effort when you decide on which you want and act on that decision.

[Kitty Purry]

Dude you should not cheat pick a girl. J have been cheated on once and it sucks. You need to pick one choose with your head. Not the other one. Me and the girl who cheated on me r still togther, so maybe you still have a chance with the nic girl, so good luck

[Origami]

Just because humans are flawed doesn't mean that we can all be callous arseholes.
And you don't need help, you just need to make a choice and have the willpower to stick to it.

Btw, asking for opinions isn't putting effort into it. You will be putting forth the effort when you decide on which you want and act on that decision.

Genuine advice if ever there was such.
But I agree with them whole-heartedly.
A relationship, in my eyes, is not shy of marriage in terms of needing commitment. If you can't commit to this girl and are trapped in lust with the other then it's best to let her go because in the end you'll inevitably break her heart even more. I agree, we have flaws, and most of us guys are lustful pricks to sum it in short, but it's a matter of controlling lust so that you can actually be able to love. A relationship built on lust is fun, but in the long run you always miss out on an oppurtunity to be with someone so amazing, they only come once. Love - Lust; one of the two.