KenFisher
December 28th, 2009, 02:13 PM
Well, as no one knows why am I feeling crap, I'm gonna say, the summary's in my blog. But just gonna say a few things here.
Well, this Santie dude. I loved him, but it turned out bad.
I thought going to my new school makes me feel good. new friends, someone else to love (yes, I'm sure.) And that I can forget this Santie.
When I got back from holiday today, I checked up on a thread started by a friend trying to trick everyone with her spam letter. The contents are, um, whilst witty, also, sick. they have sick minds.
And people seems to put their slash goggles on and say, oh, him and another friend are a couple. (they obviously aren't)
Naturally, that depresses me. I loved him, and they slash him and another dude. O_o
But I can't really moan to my friends. They had been stuck between me and him for a year and more, and I don't want them to go through this again.
He also said, as a joke, "*cries about gayness*"
I assume he's not homophobic. And that it's just response to being slashed together with this other dude.
Whereas I was not so chuffed. You cry about gayness? How about me and all the hell? All those nights me crying (rather too loudly) in my bed?
I always felt sorry for making us suffer. I confessed to him, afterall, setting this off.
I had an urge to delete the thread. Couldn't. Just couldn't.
And now I feel like, needing love. Someone that loves me that I also love back. I know he had hurt me bad. (I do try to get over it...)
And this dude in my new school, whom I love now is prob straight. And my best friend. Can't risk that, given what happened with Santie.
I'll never get him, no?
It's like, I know I need to cheer up and forget Santie. I know I need to find someone that would love me back. This dude prob won't fancy me.
I just seem to be unable to pick myself up.
GAH!
[/rant]
Sorry about that.
Well, this Santie dude. I loved him, but it turned out bad.
I thought going to my new school makes me feel good. new friends, someone else to love (yes, I'm sure.) And that I can forget this Santie.
When I got back from holiday today, I checked up on a thread started by a friend trying to trick everyone with her spam letter. The contents are, um, whilst witty, also, sick. they have sick minds.
And people seems to put their slash goggles on and say, oh, him and another friend are a couple. (they obviously aren't)
Naturally, that depresses me. I loved him, and they slash him and another dude. O_o
But I can't really moan to my friends. They had been stuck between me and him for a year and more, and I don't want them to go through this again.
He also said, as a joke, "*cries about gayness*"
I assume he's not homophobic. And that it's just response to being slashed together with this other dude.
Whereas I was not so chuffed. You cry about gayness? How about me and all the hell? All those nights me crying (rather too loudly) in my bed?
I always felt sorry for making us suffer. I confessed to him, afterall, setting this off.
I had an urge to delete the thread. Couldn't. Just couldn't.
And now I feel like, needing love. Someone that loves me that I also love back. I know he had hurt me bad. (I do try to get over it...)
And this dude in my new school, whom I love now is prob straight. And my best friend. Can't risk that, given what happened with Santie.
I'll never get him, no?
It's like, I know I need to cheer up and forget Santie. I know I need to find someone that would love me back. This dude prob won't fancy me.
I just seem to be unable to pick myself up.
GAH!
[/rant]
Sorry about that.