sarah newman
December 24th, 2009, 01:03 AM
Okay, so many of you might no me from writing my first post 'help me make up my mind'. Bu t the thing is now my parents no, as well asmy younger bro by accidentlyseeing them, then parents got help but i dont want to go. My tutor teacher said i should but he is helping me on emotional side. but one day he phoned my mum and said his main issue is what i tell people as im scaring them.wtf? I only told two people then 1 of those people told 3 other people and it went on from there and i get the blaim for gettin every1 involved? I see things now, i tryed to kill myself by nearly getting ran over by a car as i just walked out in the road, i cut and burn myself,i cut on my arms, legs, ankles, stomach, shoulders and i burn on my arms.
But the thing is i dont want to stop but i have just found out i was sexially assaulted, and dad thinks its got something to do with the school but it has nothing to dowith it, i got bullied, i dont really eat anything, im messed up in the head right now, i want to see my aunty who im not allowed to see as she only cares about babies and she nearly destroyed my mum by trying to ave an affair with dad, but i was still dumb enough to nick her number of my mums phone and consider meeting up with her or calling her. I get the feeling there is nothing worth living for, im just one big failure-but i dont want the burning or cutting to stop as its the one things that gets me through life-I have loads of scars from the previous cuts on my body, what differentce will it make for a few more cuts
I also dont get on wth any of my family, especially my mum-i hate her and she nos i do, i cant stand her, shes always on my case and she calls me names like slut and mental then she denies it after-i no it sounds harsh sayin i hate my mum but im only being honest. i might as well get through this on my mown as i have dont for months, ill just have to put up with being alone a heck of a lot
I just need to get through this but i dont no how xxx:(
But the thing is i dont want to stop but i have just found out i was sexially assaulted, and dad thinks its got something to do with the school but it has nothing to dowith it, i got bullied, i dont really eat anything, im messed up in the head right now, i want to see my aunty who im not allowed to see as she only cares about babies and she nearly destroyed my mum by trying to ave an affair with dad, but i was still dumb enough to nick her number of my mums phone and consider meeting up with her or calling her. I get the feeling there is nothing worth living for, im just one big failure-but i dont want the burning or cutting to stop as its the one things that gets me through life-I have loads of scars from the previous cuts on my body, what differentce will it make for a few more cuts
I also dont get on wth any of my family, especially my mum-i hate her and she nos i do, i cant stand her, shes always on my case and she calls me names like slut and mental then she denies it after-i no it sounds harsh sayin i hate my mum but im only being honest. i might as well get through this on my mown as i have dont for months, ill just have to put up with being alone a heck of a lot
I just need to get through this but i dont no how xxx:(