i need advice on how to get my self back on track!!

[woody92]

Well here it goes::: (sorry if i go on a bit!!)

Ok then, well it started 8 months ago (Exactly today)…
I don’t really know why but 8 months ago today I asked a girl out (I live in Spain and she was my 1st GF in Spain coz I am originally from the UK and i moved her about 5 years ago)…
I thought she would say no but I asked her out anyway, but to my surprise she said YES she would go out with me, and I was really happy from that day on… We started to go out together. (Before I asked her out we had known each other about two years).

I don’t really know why but don’t get me wrong I did have feelings for her, but soon after I asked myself WHY?? Coz I knew that I was in to guys a lot more than girls, so I think I just wanted to “BE NORMAL”. As our relationship went on, for some reason I felt like I was TRAPED! Coz I could not say ANYTHING that I thought, coz I would REALLY REALLY upset her in some cases. And well I have aspergers which impairers social interaction, so can’t read other peoples body language and expressions and stuff like that, so I just kept back a lot of thing.
I did however tell her that I was BI! And she was ok with that! After I told her though I did feel a bit bad, but it was better coming from me than from someone else (I BELIEVE).
THIS IS SOOOO HARD TO WRITE…
BUT I wonder IF I REALLY LOVED her or not…
So about three weeks ago I found VT… and on VT I met someone who I REALY LOVE (drewlink99)!!
And so I told my GF (back then) that I was talking to a guy from VT and she said “oh COOL”, and then I told her that he was GAY… and well she said “OH”.
At first she said it would be ok and she doesn’t mind, but then about two weeks ago she started to get a bit “funny” with me and we had an argument about her family (u c her family aren’t the best and I was always the bad guy coz I changed their daughter, etc...) and well a week ago last FRIDAY we broke up! And today I saw her for the first time since we broke up coz I phoned her up to see if she wanted to go for a coffee! And she said yes, so we went and had a coffee and SHE WAS A CHANGED PERSON!! It was like I was the worst person on the planet!!

She was up tight and she was with her 3 friends but I asked her if she could go alone so we could talk… and she said no 1 other friend would come or NOTHING.
So I said Ok that friend can come, but 3 FRIENDS came (1 of them was the friend that I said could come) and I felt really uneasy coz I wasn’t prepared for 3 friends to be there!
And NOW I feel really DEPRESSED coz:
I miss her! ((But I don’t want to get back with her!!))
And she has a new BF.

Ok, so do I (YES I HAVE A BF, BUT ONLY ONLINE UNFORTUNATLY, AND I REALY WANT TO MEET HIM IN PERSON [DREWLINK99]).

So my question is, has anyone (either that u know or yourself), been through anything similar? Did u/they cope? Did you/they think about doing anything stupid? And finally, did you/they feel like curling up in to a ball and just stay in your/their room on the net, coz it makes you/them happier??

Sorry if I have GONE ON AND ON, but this is how I feel… please feel free to PM me, e-mail me or chat to me:
My address is [email protected] ([email protected]) and I also have Gmail at [email protected] ([email protected]) thanks for reading and for your help!!

[drewlink99]

I hope you get some good advice!!!!
I hope that you feel better!
And I hope you get it all worked out!
I hope I can help!!!!
Just tell me HOW!!!
And I will try!

[Kahn]

Well listen.. Have you tried to contact her since? And if you knew that you liked men more than you liked girls you should've told her. You kind of led her to believe that you were happy, not anxious and feeling trapped. Honestly from my perspective you brought this upon yourself. You shouldn't be hiding things from people so close for so long. You should have come out to her before hand before your relationship really took off. Now because that happened you are being ignored, and pretty much just swept away.

I didn't mean to sound blunt or mean in any way. Just that is what I see. You have caused this and now you are trying to self pity your self. You really should have informed her of your sexuality before hand. This probably never would have happened if you had.

[Blank]

i could be that she could not accept the fact that you like guys, only that she didn't tell you, from what you've written its pretty likely.

if you miss her you could call her someday, sort things out. the two of you could always be friends.

one thing though, just because you're bi, that doesn't allow you to have both a girlfriend and a boyfriend at the same time. it may be ok to you, but not to them. your girlfriend probably didn't want to hurt your feelings, which is why she told you she was cool with it. cause, she was in love with you

[pumphocin]

I accept with information:
I don’t really know why but don’t get me wrong I did have feelings for her, but soon after I asked myself WHY?? Coz I knew that I was in to guys a lot more than girls, so I think I just wanted to “BE NORMAL”. As our relationship went on, for some reason I felt like I was TRAPED! Coz I could not say ANYTHING that I thought, coz I would REALLY REALLY upset her in some cases. And well I have aspergers which impairers social interaction, so can’t read other peoples body language and expressions and stuff like that, so I just kept back a lot of thing.
I did however tell her that I was BI! And she was ok with that! After I told her though I did feel a bit bad, but it was better coming from me than from someone else (I BELIEVE).

[Obscene Eyedeas]

I have recently gne through the exact same thing as we speak my ex is still trying to kill himslf and i flt like you did but i leaned on my gf and she gt me tru it just let ppl in vent all ur feelings not some. Scream at the top of ur lungs let out ur frustration and move on. Hold ur new bf dear he loves u and u love him u have wat evryone needs love

[woody92]

LOZZYPOP:::

Yea ur right i do have what everyone wants but my BF is in the USA and i am in Spain!!! but i do talk to him nearly everyday and I LOVE HIM SOOOO MUCH!!!

i am stronger now and i am telling my BF EVERYTHING thats wrong soo i am venting it all out now!

(THANKS FOR ALL THE POSTS!!)