I'm slipping.

[dstnyisurs]

Delete.

[Harley Quinn]

For the past few weeks, life has been work, work, and more work. School is almost overwhelming, but I'm pulling straight A's almost. I'm applying for a job. Next Tuesday I'll be 15 and a half and I will be able to start driving on the road practicing. Big things happening, but I can feel myself slipping.
I've basically been to the grain, working, getting shit done with happiness and feeling good, but alas it can't last forever.
I'm getting raging mad, and triggered by the littlest things. Too much mania, too much energy, I can't control any of it. I feel like my emotions are running away without me. The smallest comment sends me spiraling into more and more hatred.
I need to be perfect. I need to be perfect. I need to be perfect... fuck it all. Fits of recklessness, mania, all this shit and I'm too tired to carry anything out so I'm having nightmares because of all of it.
I want to cut but I'm too too tired at night, and I want to just have one good night to stay up, down some pills, cut too deep, and sit there in a beautiful delerium for a few hours, but there's no time and I have no energy. Addictions that can't be fed. It's maddening.
I don't know what to do.
You need to release that bad tension into something constructive at night or when you get the urge really bad, school will get easier because as you get older you can cope with more without feeling like this. Happiness won't last forever, but that's because we all get to a time where it may seem like no way out but in reality you can change that, you have to try and try and try. If you stay up at night and cut deep, take the pills, how would that make others feel? Because your not in this alone, you have those who care and those who don't want to see you like this. Life will change, it will get better if you let it. You need to get help, that's if you dont have some already, talk it out with people, let yourself go, in a positive way without causing pain. If you cut or OD, you will continue to go back to it and that's not what you want, You can beat this if you try. PM me anytime. :hug:

[chelsay13]

I'm in the same situation. I NEED to have straight a's... B's aren't enough for me.
Message me, we can chit-chat, and hopefully help each other out ;)
PM me anytime :)

[piggy-wiggy]

pretty much what siobhan said is bang on..
cant add much to that,. :)
you can also pm me any time.. =]

[1_21Guns]

For the past few weeks, life has been work, work, and more work. School is almost overwhelming, but I'm pulling straight A's almost. I'm applying for a job. Next Tuesday I'll be 15 and a half and I will be able to start driving on the road practicing. Big things happening, but I can feel myself slipping.
I've basically been to the grain, working, getting shit done with happiness and feeling good, but alas it can't last forever.
I'm getting raging mad, and triggered by the littlest things. Too much mania, too much energy, I can't control any of it. I feel like my emotions are running away without me. The smallest comment sends me spiraling into more and more hatred.
I need to be perfect. I need to be perfect. I need to be perfect... fuck it all. Fits of recklessness, mania, all this shit and I'm too tired to carry anything out so I'm having nightmares because of all of it.
I want to cut but I'm too too tired at night, and I want to just have one good night to stay up, down some pills, cut too deep, and sit there in a beautiful delerium for a few hours, but there's no time and I have no energy. Addictions that can't be fed. It's maddening.
I don't know what to do.

Kyrra, I always get like this at the moment, i stormed off from my friends in floods of tears because they started singing christmas songs near me. I couldn't take control over my own actions, and I wanted to cut to regain that control, but I know my mind is strong enough. You just need to find a way to release the stress, and just like Siobhan said, theres nothing that can really be added after that, stay strong, and remember i'm always here for you too.

[dstnyisurs]

Delete.