How can i cope?

[sarah newman]

I dont want any of you thinking im moaning because im not, i just want to let out all my feelings, so here it goes...
The razorblade going across my forearms, abit on my leg, it feels so good. LOADS of people know, i dont even know how they found out. So one of my friends told tutor teacher and he sent me to medical room and they got me a counsillor. I no longer want to go. Yeah he said it was totally my choice if i choose to go or not but im scared. Im scared if he will make me go, i know alot of friends care for me, one of my friends have been through it before and she has stood by me 100%. No one really understands how i feel. I want to tell someone, friends, tutor teacher, i know they were very supportive before but what if they dont understand. Im bleeding, it feels so good, there not deep cuts but there not shallow cuts either, but still they make me happy. I get so confused, i might suffer from depression, i cry every night as i dont know what to do. Tears streaming down my face as i type this. Im lonely, empty inside. I dont know who to tell, i get bullied, they treat me like shit, i hate them. I dont really like my family, they found out once before, they had a go at me, i knew they wouldnt understand. If i have a bad day, i cut, if i get bullied for the slightest thing, i cut. I feel the earge to cut at school, at home. I dont deserve this, im only 13. Please tell me what i should do someone, anyone, before its to late. xxx

[Amyxoxo]

As i have said to you before, you should really go and see the counceler. They wont make you stop they might encourage you but that is all. They will probally talk to you about how you are feeling and what is happening and making you cut.
This may be the best thing for you atm.
Talk to the friend that has done it before, she will be even more understanding over your feelings.
Take care xx

[Aspiringanonymous]

Above all else, you must want to get better, before other people can truly help you. The only one that can force you to seek a better alternative is yourself. For the most part, counsellors and friends are here to listen, and encourage one to understand their situation, as well as seek their own solutions. Sometimes, having the right people to talk to makes a huge difference. But again, it cannot be fully effective unless it is approached with a genuine desire for change, and readiness to take ownership of one's own well-being.

Has there been a time in your life, as a young child perhaps, where you felt differently, better? Cherish these moments, even if the memory has faded to nearly nothing, for when all else fails, that is concrete proof that you do have the ability to pull through, and return to a better state of being. No one is depressive and emotionally troubled by nature. Perhaps that will help. Try to understand how you became the way you are currently. It is a good place to start.

You have made a good start, by reaching out on here. For myself personally, virtual-oriented support has always been more effective than 'in real life', face-to-face, for a number of reasons. The process of finding a suitable support system is largely one of trial and error; we must take the initiative to ask others for guidance. Guaranteed, you will find people who do not understand, perhaps even ostracize you in return, but at some point the effort does reap rewards.