I'm feeling really lonely :(

[Old Account]

Whenever I read through things on here where people are talking about there boyfriend or girlfriends, i start to get extremely jealous and sad because I wish that I had some, something true, something real. I want to have an actually relationship, I think My depression would be a lot better then, I just want someone to hold, to talk to, to hug, and to know that we love each other. I feel completely unlovable and I feel like I'll never be able to have someone love me. I get really attached, really easily, I fall in love right of the bat, but I'm still not able to be loyal, and not like other girls too, I feel completely deprived of any contact with human beings, I feel like it keeps running deeper and I can't catch it, I don't want to either. I know I can't save my self now, I'm as worthless as a stillborn fetus, I'm discarded and forgotten, I just want someone to lay with and hold tight, someone who I can cry with, I just want that so bad...... :(

The song Something I Can Never Have by Nine Inch Nails is a song i've been listening to alot lately

"I just want something, I can never have..."


:(

[Old Account]

A teddy bear might help

[Old Account]

Also, I often have these fantasies of killing people that have been really mean to me my whole life in really morbid fashions, I often think of torturing them by hanging them from meat hooks and hitting them while there alive, I have thoughts that are worse then that, I just though I'd give you an example. I feel like I would have something special with a girl when I'd do this, Kiss them while there hanging from the meat hooks and tell them I love them, I would finally feel like i've done something then, I could lay with them and hold them..... :(

I'm so messed up...

[Old Account]

I keep on transitioning between two steps now.

First: Sad, Lonely, Wishing I had someone to love
Second: Forcing someone to love me and making them be with me and torturing someone that's done something to me

It loops....

[Imma Let You Finish]

Wow you seriously are messed up. Go find someone or a group to hang with, and become friends. The best relationships start by being friends. Also forget about hanging people from meat hooks, go out and get some fresh air instead.

[Old Account]

I'm socially awkward and I always end up asking them out almost right away.

[Imma Let You Finish]

I'm socially awkward and I always end up asking them out almost right away.

You don't ask right away, get to know them first. You'll seem desperate, and girls don't like that.

[Suicune]

You don't ask right away, get to know them first. You'll seem desperate, and girls don't like that.

EXACTLY!

Well anyway I feel the same way sometimes dude.
But your only 15! You have a whole life ahead of you!