Cannot be bothered anymore

[Skeletal-Chic]

I have lost pretty much all hope on finding any real friends anymore. I am a loner with only a few friends that are only trying to act nice but realy dislike me and bitch about me. I can't see the point in trying to be nice to people or trying to make friends when the "friends" I've got constantly let me down and try to force me to change who I am. Advice?

[Kaius]

Well, For one, they dont sound like friends if their doing that behind your back Ben. I know how you feel im pretty much the same, here, im a loner, im not really the type to socialise with people in fear of having any of the trust i give out to people, betrayed. If you ever need anyone to talk to feel free to pm or add me on msn/myspace. The people here are nice people who will be looking out for you if you need it. You arnt alone.

[Skeletal-Chic]

Thanks that's nice to hear some advice. And I feel exactly the same way. I have told people really personal stuff that I didn't want getting out and I got betrayed so Im not very trusting anymore

[Kaius]

I can relate, Just keep in mind that if they cannot see they have a good friend like you, then they arnt worth the trouble. :)

[Aspiringanonymous]

Kaius is right, don't bother wasting energy on these people, if you already know what they are all about. It is better to be alone than entertain the company of those who can do you no good.

Genuine, spiritually rewarding friendships are very difficult to find, no matter how sociable one is by nature. Those who pay more attention to generic interests and issues (sports, celebrities, aesthetics, etc) tend to make friends rather effortlessly as compared to others whose main areas of interest involve deeper, often sensitive issues. Thus we have the image of your typical popular person, who is constantly surrounded by 'friends' and admirers, yet cannot help but feel a profound loneliness inside. For 'loners' however, interaction with others is usually quality over quantity, and one good friend will offer more to the individual than a dozen casual friends ever could.

Most of my significant human contact comes from the online community, especially ones such as this, where like-minded individuals can congregate from around the world, transcending the limitations of physical proximity. I began to frequent online forums at the age of eight, and am still doing so today; while the internet is infamous for breeding impostors and deceitful information, I truly do believe that under the right circumstances, it provides an opportunity for emotional honesty beyond what 'real life' interaction will ever be capable of.

On a side note, the experience of long-term solitude has its unique potential for beauty, should one be awakened to them. But, that would be for a different discussion. Feel free to message me if you are interested, but the least I can say is, you are never alone. Don't ever compromise your identity for other people - it is a mistake that all too many people make.