PaperFacesOnParade
October 15th, 2009, 12:44 PM
I haven't posted on here for a quite a while, but I've not been feeling so good lately.
There's a bunch of things going on, most of them small, but they all add up... I just feel like I need somewhere to vent.
So about 2 months ago, I cut myself... I didn't mean to... but there was so much stress in the house, I picked up the scissors. And then the next night, my friend was egging me on about something, and it happened again. It hasn't happened since, but it almost did, I picked up the scissors, but then I thought of my friend, and felt so guilty, I didn't.
I'm also in a really bad situation. I like someone. Really really really like someone. Which, sure, sounds great. Okay, now don't eat me. But he's a teacher. And I've liked him ever since I was in year 8 (I'm now in year 10). This makes me sound so stupid... and saying this makes me sound even more pathetic: he's everything I have ever looked for in a man, musical, intelligent, funny, charming, a little crazy, and in my opinion, quite gorgeous... but I know that nothing could ever happen between us, and I really don't want him to get in trouble or lose his job... he's a great teacher, and makes me a feel a lot happier. The thing is, I just want to forget about it. It is distracting me from my studies and stuff... but I just can't get him out of my head!! It's driving me absolutely CRAZY. At one point a few weeks ago, I really, truly thought I was getting over him. But then one day, I was talking to him and I just... liked him. We were even having this really crazy conversation about 2 musical theatre characters, when he ran his hand through his hair, and I said "um what were you saying??!!"
So basically, I just want to get over him... any help? :(
Also been feeling as though quite a few of my friends don't want me around anymore... I don't wish to divulge stuff, but a few of them have been digging at me and stuff... (and Natalie, if you read this, no it's not you, just wanted to clarify that :) )
and then... there are 2 guys who like me (it's flattering) but one just dumped his girlfriend, and I think he just wants a rebound, (I only like him as a friend anyway) and the other feels like my older brother... how can I put them both down nicely?
so yeah...
There's a bunch of things going on, most of them small, but they all add up... I just feel like I need somewhere to vent.
So about 2 months ago, I cut myself... I didn't mean to... but there was so much stress in the house, I picked up the scissors. And then the next night, my friend was egging me on about something, and it happened again. It hasn't happened since, but it almost did, I picked up the scissors, but then I thought of my friend, and felt so guilty, I didn't.
I'm also in a really bad situation. I like someone. Really really really like someone. Which, sure, sounds great. Okay, now don't eat me. But he's a teacher. And I've liked him ever since I was in year 8 (I'm now in year 10). This makes me sound so stupid... and saying this makes me sound even more pathetic: he's everything I have ever looked for in a man, musical, intelligent, funny, charming, a little crazy, and in my opinion, quite gorgeous... but I know that nothing could ever happen between us, and I really don't want him to get in trouble or lose his job... he's a great teacher, and makes me a feel a lot happier. The thing is, I just want to forget about it. It is distracting me from my studies and stuff... but I just can't get him out of my head!! It's driving me absolutely CRAZY. At one point a few weeks ago, I really, truly thought I was getting over him. But then one day, I was talking to him and I just... liked him. We were even having this really crazy conversation about 2 musical theatre characters, when he ran his hand through his hair, and I said "um what were you saying??!!"
So basically, I just want to get over him... any help? :(
Also been feeling as though quite a few of my friends don't want me around anymore... I don't wish to divulge stuff, but a few of them have been digging at me and stuff... (and Natalie, if you read this, no it's not you, just wanted to clarify that :) )
and then... there are 2 guys who like me (it's flattering) but one just dumped his girlfriend, and I think he just wants a rebound, (I only like him as a friend anyway) and the other feels like my older brother... how can I put them both down nicely?
so yeah...