sasquatch
October 8th, 2009, 11:17 AM
Heya, just been reading peoples poems, espeically the ones that relate to heartbreak, and so i thought to cheer you up a bit i'd write a spoof death metal song. :P and to humor myself obviously...so...here goes, lets hope it's a good'n
YOU. you melted my heart! To a silver platter!
PREHEATED oven. 200 degrees!
I ALWAYS KNEW. YOU. WOULD. Broil my balls in antifreeze!
Or give me a beanie INNNNFESSSTEDDDD with FLEEEEAS!
ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOAR
YOU. gaffataped my scrotum to your dartboard of hatred!
REJOICE in your joy for my nutsack has beeen catered...
TO YOUR gaping MAWWWWWWW.
OOOOOZZZZINNNG . YOUR. .ACIDIC. SLIIIIIIIIIIIME
I was smiling! I was happy! in our LOOOVE i was engrossed
SO you skewered my tongue to a 7 FOOT FENCE POST...AAAGGGGGHHH
CRUCCCCIIIIIFIXXXXTION . OF MY TONNNGUUUUUUUEEEEE
I was balls deep in your beartrap! emasculation was your PRIIIIZE
I could not scream or else you would have CRUSHED MY HEAD WITHIN YOUR FUCKING.....
THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII----IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHHHHHHHHHHHHH-----GHHHHHHHHS
ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRR
(pig squeal)
ROOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAA-AAAAAAAPOCALYPTIC VENNNGENCE
You put MY BRAIN in a blender!, poured the gloop in an envelope.
LABELED. IF SENT TO FUCKING WRONG ADRESS. RETURN. TO. FUCK. ING. SENDDDERRRRRR
(completely fucking epic guitar solo)
(completely fucking epic drum solo)
(completely fucking epic random screaming and pig squealing)
...
(completely fucking epic solo on the triangle)
TINNNNGG
Trapped within your gaping. boiling, scathinggggg VOOOORTEXXXXXX.
OF DEEEEEEEEEAAAAATHHHH.
and THEN when I was SLEEPING you decided to CREEEEP in, and CUT OFF MY NIPPLES. and FEED THEM TO pingping.
YOUUR POOOOODLLLLEEEE ROOOOOAR ROOOOOAR ROOOOOOOOAR
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
ahem
i have all the talent of a death metal song writer. I swear :P
again, i know this isn't an example of eloquent and beautifully set out writing, but its a piss take and was a great laugh to write, so enjoy :D:D
YOU. you melted my heart! To a silver platter!
PREHEATED oven. 200 degrees!
I ALWAYS KNEW. YOU. WOULD. Broil my balls in antifreeze!
Or give me a beanie INNNNFESSSTEDDDD with FLEEEEAS!
ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOAR
YOU. gaffataped my scrotum to your dartboard of hatred!
REJOICE in your joy for my nutsack has beeen catered...
TO YOUR gaping MAWWWWWWW.
OOOOOZZZZINNNG . YOUR. .ACIDIC. SLIIIIIIIIIIIME
I was smiling! I was happy! in our LOOOVE i was engrossed
SO you skewered my tongue to a 7 FOOT FENCE POST...AAAGGGGGHHH
CRUCCCCIIIIIFIXXXXTION . OF MY TONNNGUUUUUUUEEEEE
I was balls deep in your beartrap! emasculation was your PRIIIIZE
I could not scream or else you would have CRUSHED MY HEAD WITHIN YOUR FUCKING.....
THIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII----IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHHHHHHHHHHHHH-----GHHHHHHHHS
ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRR
(pig squeal)
ROOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAA-AAAAAAAPOCALYPTIC VENNNGENCE
You put MY BRAIN in a blender!, poured the gloop in an envelope.
LABELED. IF SENT TO FUCKING WRONG ADRESS. RETURN. TO. FUCK. ING. SENDDDERRRRRR
(completely fucking epic guitar solo)
(completely fucking epic drum solo)
(completely fucking epic random screaming and pig squealing)
...
(completely fucking epic solo on the triangle)
TINNNNGG
Trapped within your gaping. boiling, scathinggggg VOOOORTEXXXXXX.
OF DEEEEEEEEEAAAAATHHHH.
and THEN when I was SLEEPING you decided to CREEEEP in, and CUT OFF MY NIPPLES. and FEED THEM TO pingping.
YOUUR POOOOODLLLLEEEE ROOOOOAR ROOOOOAR ROOOOOOOOAR
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
ahem
i have all the talent of a death metal song writer. I swear :P
again, i know this isn't an example of eloquent and beautifully set out writing, but its a piss take and was a great laugh to write, so enjoy :D:D