I've screwed up badly

[Darkness]

Last night I had a fight, a big one with the girl I like, this happened over text:

I asked for her help then rejected it, and asked for it again and rejected it again, (Stupid huh?) So she gives up (, like you'd expect). I then say it's nothing to do with her, (I meant to say it wasn't her fault but never mind) she then gets angry (Quite rightly) and tells me not to involve her if it's nothing to do with her (I should have shut the hell up then) So I shouted at her, she didn't care so I told her everything about liking her, about cutting because of her, and then I criticized the way she lives her life, and said that she only cared about herself (Which is a load of bull she's the most caring person I've ever met), so she yells at me saying she'll live her life the way she likes it because she lives for the moment and enjoys it, and that I've no bloody idea how shit and angry I've made her, and that I'm pathetic for cutting over likeing someone, she says if I ever talk like that to her again she'll get a couple of guy to beat me up (which isn't something I blame her for).

I've been so so so bloody shallow, and I can't begin to explain how I managed to let this happen, I've never acted like this before, I've got to stop cutting, It's clouding my judgement to badly.

I've broken the friendship that existed between us and I need to know how to fix it, for all my family's sake not just mine. Please tell me what I have to do because I don't think words can fix this,
Thank you.

[Shenron]

I've broken the friendship that existed between us and I need to know how to fix it

Ouch, this will not be an easy fix. I can only suggest that you go to her and beg for forgiveness. Tell her you were upset, and your emotions clouded your judgement. Promise to stop cutting (only if you can keep the promise) and tell her you are sorry for treating her like that.

Hope I helped :)

[Darkness]

Ouch, this will not be an easy fix. I can only suggest that you go to her and beg for forgiveness. Tell her you were upset, and your emotions clouded your judgement. Promise to stop cutting (only if you can keep the promise) and tell her you are sorry for treating her like that.

Hope I helped :)

I'd put a smile in here but they don't have one for rueful, I'd go to her if I could get to her, she lives so far away and I don't have te £80 for the ferry fare. :(

[Grey fox]

Show her that you weren't thinking right, and that you are sorry, and send her a link to this post. It explains everything and shows you are sorry and feel really bad about it.

It will take a little time to heal over, but you really need to work towards it, be focussed on repairing your relationship with her, and forget everything else for a while (N.B. that doesn't include vital things like breathing and eating, try to remember about that!)

Making contact to apologise is the best first step to take - depending on your relationship beforehand, you could turn up at her house with a little gift (like flowers) or something.

Just make the effort! :)

[Harley Quinn]

Tell her what was running through your mind at the time, explain that whats happened is not her fault and what you said was a spare of the moment thing and you didnt mean it (unless you did) that you were selfish.

Its not that you shouted at her it the fact you told her everything all in one go, but you we upset and thats not bad at all. I think you might need to leave things for a few days and see how the situation develops. If things seem to be better and both of you have calmed down try talking to her about all of what you've said.

If words dont work show her with actions, improve your cutting and try hard to stop and this will show her how hard your trying and how much you want things back. As they say "Actions speak louder than words"

[Shenron]

send her a link to this post. It explains everything and shows you are sorry and feel really bad about it.

No, don't send her a link to the post if you are going to say anything that I or anyone else tells you to, otherwise she will just think you are taking the words from someone else and that it's no a sincere apology.

[Shenron]

I'd put a smile in here but they don't have one for rueful, I'd go to her if I could get to her, she lives so far away and I don't have te £80 for the ferry fare. :(

Well, then call her, that is the next best thing, but remember, it is always easier to insult or yell at someone over the phone than it is face to face, so don't let your anger get the best of you if she makes you mad.

*EDIT: @Mod; Sorry about the double posting, I got carried away, If you can merge the two posts, be my guest. :)

[Darkness]

Well, then call her, that is the next best thing, but remember, it is always easier to insult or yell at someone over the phone than it is face to face, so don't let your anger get the best of you if she makes you mad.

*EDIT: @Mod; Sorry about the double posting, I got carried away, If you can merge the two posts, be my guest. :)

I can't I tryed calling her mobile it tells me that it's not a reconized number.... :( this is not going to be easy.

She has relatives I have their number should I try and get her home phone of of them?

[Shenron]

I can't I tryed calling her mobile it tells me that it's not a reconized number.... :( this is not going to be easy.

She has relatives I have their number should I try and get her home phone of of them?

That would be a good idea, if they know you, otherwise, they may think you are creep. IDK if you know the name of one of her guy friends at school or not, but you could say you were him...well, actually, if they know him and you dont sound like him, they may still think you are a creep.


How did you get in touch with her before? Use the same method as then.

[Darkness]

I think it's over, she texted me I felt I had to reply so I apologized there, basically she said I was incentive in more words and that she couldn't be arsed with me or this relationship anymore, I think I've lost her.

@Chris the way I got in touch with her the first time was on holiday which would involve another £80 so it's no go.

The only question is should I try contacting her again in like 3 months or is this really the end?

[nick]

Feren do you have her address? Send her a bunch of roses, apologise like hell, send a letter. Best of all would be to convince her that this has made you determined to stop the cutting and get your like back on track. You've only just started, if you dont stop now its only going to get harder and will end up screwing up more people and more relationships.

[Darkness]

Not hers, nor do I know anyone who'd give it to me, I will stop, I must, keeping on like this is going to destroy all my relationships if I don't. But if she won't talk to me how can I convince her of anything? and if she will lisiten I'm having a hard enough time conving myself.

[Sapphire]

You have to give her time to calm down.
Only once she's calmed down will she be open to actually listen to anything you have to say.

In the meantime, stop choosing to cut.
You know it won't lead to good things and (as she said) doing it over liking a girl is pathetic.

[Darkness]

You have to give her time to calm down.
Only once she's calmed down will she be open to actually listen to anything you have to say.

In the meantime, stop choosing to cut.
You know it won't lead to good things and (as she said) doing it over liking a girl is pathetic.

And as you said Sapphire, I should not have disreguarded your advice, I shall not do so again.

[Hyper]

First you need to get over this teenage pity-yourself-my-life-is-so-dark BS and get yourself right

Nobody can like somebody genuinely if they don't like themselves, are putting themselves down and are talking pathetic crap all the time

Give the girl some time to calm down and if you've come to some self realization talk to her and apologize

[Darkness]

Right thanks all, :) I'll do as much as this stuff as I can...

[Specter]

Perhaps the best thing to do is leave her be for a few days, then in person tell her your genuinely sorry, and walk away. Let her sleep on it, she might accept your apology.