Being Bi

[daneprattis]

What exactly happens when your bi when you are older, because im bi but i know that i definatley want to settle down with a wife and have kids etc, etc. But i know that that isn't really going to be enough for me. So my question is when bi people grow up and if they get a wife what do they do? Do they force themseves not to like males, or does their wofe know and accept the fact that they are bi and let them make out with males or do they do it secretly?
Thanks for your help.

[EvilTwinXD]

it depends. Bi people like one sex more. Just by alittle. I think you will be fine with a wife and kids. You have a long way to go and figure something out. Don't worry it will come to you.

[nick]

OK, I'm bi, I would like to have kids too.

But as I see it atm it depends who you find yourself in a long term relationship with, I'm not sure that that can be planned. But what I am sure is that once you're in that relationship you should be faithful and true to them. There is no more justification in a bi guy having a gay affair to satisfy gay urges than in a str8 married guy having a st8 affair, its still a betrayal of your partner.

So you may have to choose between family, and a marriage that isnt really what you want, and the possibility of hapiness with a guy that you love.

I may have to too, atm there is absolutely no doubt I would choose the second option.

[Severus Snape]

You can't force yourself not to be sexually attracted to one thing or the other. My guess would be care for the family would come first and foremost. The desire for sex probably fades into the background (but wont go away entirely).

Keep in mind you are a 15 year old guy with raging hormones, you want sex constantly. I think that as we mature, the sex drive tends to come more under control. I sure know it has for me. I was jackin off multiple times a day when 14 and the thought of doing that now just sounds so strange

[hiker1992]

Okay, so for any bisexual person out there, to truly be bisexual, I think you need to be able to answer this question: can you picture yourself being in love with both sexes? Because really, I don't think someone can be bisexual, you're either gay and not wanting to admit it completely, or you're straight and just a little experimental. A lot of guys seem to be in the position where they feel a sexual attraction to males, but can't really picture themselves getting married to one, or spending the rest of their life with one. Really, it seems like you're just in that stage of experimenting, so you should just kind of give yourself some time to decide.

[nick]

Okay, so for any bisexual person out there, to truly be bisexual, I think you need to be able to answer this question: can you picture yourself being in love with both sexes? Because really, I don't think someone can be bisexual, you're either gay and not wanting to admit it completely, or you're straight and just a little experimental. A lot of guys seem to be in the position where they feel a sexual attraction to males, but can't really picture themselves getting married to one, or spending the rest of their life with one. Really, it seems like you're just in that stage of experimenting, so you should just kind of give yourself some time to decide.
Why talk about things you dont understand?

[hiker1992]

In what way do I not understand? It's been voiced by a number of other people that those who claim to be bisexual tend to be more interested in one sex, rather than the other, which means that you're leaning more toward that orientation anyway. I didn't say there was anything wrong with it, it just seems like it's more one or the other.

[nick]

I don't think someone can be bisexual, you're either gay and not wanting to admit it completely, or you're straight and just a little experimental.
Thats how your talking about things you dont understand. Its plain wrong, pure and simple. I am not gay and I'm not a little experimental. Also I'm not unique. What I am is bi.

[hiker1992]

Well if that's what you believe, then that's what you believe. You can't tell someone that their opinion is "wrong", because your views could be "wrong" to them. I'm not trying to disrespect you, or slander your ideals, I'm just voicing my own opinion.

[nick]

Well if that's what you believe, then that's what you believe. You can't tell someone that their opinion is "wrong", because your views could be "wrong" to them. I'm not trying to disrespect you, or slander your ideals, I'm just voicing my own opinion.
You dont get it do you? I'm not giving you an opinion or a belief, I'm telling you how I am.

Its not an ideal, I didnt choose it, its me, its how I am.

[The Joker]

There is a wonderful thing called adoption. You can have both, a kid and a husband.

[hiker1992]

Good lord! I know sexual orientation isn't an ideal or a belief! I'm well aware that it has nothing to do with choice! What I was saying was that your view on bisexuality and my view on bisexuality are different! I wasn't saying you can't like both, but you're obviously more one than the other!

[nick]

But you have, as you put it a view on bisexuality, whereas I have an experience of it. For you its a theory, for me its my life.

[Severus Snape]

But you have, as you put it a view on bisexuality, whereas I have an experience of it. For you its a theory, for me its my life.

I agree with Nick on this one mate. ^^

Unless you have romantic feelings towards other guys, you may not know exactly where you stand on the sexuality spectrum. It can be confusing at times, but you may be lusting, not loving, over other guys. ;)

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

Boys' Puberty :arrow: Teen Sexuality

[hiker1992]

I never said I was straight, so it's definitely more than theory for me, but thanks for trying. It's kind of hard to have an opinion, view or theory on something you've never experienced, don't you think?

[daveywavey]

Guys let's not get worked up here let's get back to the matter at hand which is helping this 15 yr old boy find an answer he has in his heart. Personally Adam I have wondered the same thing myself since I am bi right now as well alltho my feelings tword boys are stronger ATM I think by the time u get done with puberty u will have found ur answer out on ur own. Time has a way of working itself out. Adoption is an option yes there are apt of kids out there that need familys. Brokeback mountain showed it pretty clear what happens when u try and fight ur urges or the lack there of but unless u and ur wife are swingers u probably won't be leaving on random nights to go have sex with guy lol

[bowlheadhere]

Just because you are Bisexual and married (to a female) does not mean that you are not allowed to find others attractive (both male and female). That is like saying "I have the cutest dog, but I don't like any other dogs because they aren't mine". It really is the same thing. But anyways, it really depends on how you address your personal situation. It is not fair to stereotype an entire group based on ones own views and opinions. I know there are people out there that are bisexual, married, and sneak around with other people than their spouse, but that is their own person choice. Honestly when you find the one, your TRUE love, you will not have thoughts of sneaking around with others. When you find The One, you will only have thoughts about them.

I also want to address when you say "I know I want to have a wife and kids, etc, etc, etc". I do not honestly understand how you are bisexual, and seem to be disgusted or ashamed of being with a male. What if you find The One to be a male, would you leave them because of your childhood vision of the "perfect american family" (with a wife kids, white picket fence, etc.)? There are a lot of bisexual and gay couples who have thriving, happy family (with domestic partnerships and children, and yes, sometimes white picket fences). Because you are bisexual, you should open your mind to all types of love. Stay open to the idea that you may have a family with a domestic partnership and a happy family with children (and white picket fence).

I think instead of thinking about how and if people sneak around with others when in a committed relationship, you should be opening your mind to the idea of true love with anyone, The One that you want to be with for the rest of your life. If you keep your mind set on this, you will not have a need/think about sneaking around with other people.

(I am hella tired, so if anything doesn't make sense or sounds ridiculously stupid, I apologize in advance.)

These are just my thoughts...

[anonymousdetective]

I have no idea, but i do know one thing:

I feel really sorry for the wife in the situation your talking about.

[IAMWILL]

^^although that's pretty funny, please don't bump (post in) threads over 1 month old, otherwise they will be locked. Like this one.
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:locked: