....heart broke and confused

[soccer]

I asked this girl I really like a week ago to my school's homecoming and she said yes. Today after school she told me her dad is not letting her go because her religion has strict guides about dating or something like that. she was pretty upset. I was planning on asking her out after homecoming but if her dad is that strict i'm pretty sure he would not want her to have a boyfriend. I can't stop thinking about her. the other thing is i really want to go to homecoming because all my friends are going and at my school you have to go with a girl to go and if i ask someone else i don't want to hurt the first girls feelings cause her friends have told me she really likes me. what should i do?:(

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

Well, can you go as friends? Not on a date? If she's not allowed to date, whatever the reason, then you have to respect that. It doesn't have to mean that you can't hang out as friends though, although her dad may still not want her going to the dance, who knows.

Does your school really have the rule that you have to have a date to get in? Or is it just that you don't want to go without a date because of social pressure? At my high school, it was cheaper to buy two tickets together rather than singles, so my friends would always buy couples and split the cost, but they weren't all actually going there on a romantic date (with more girls than guys in our social circle it was mostly two girls buying tickets together anyways, none of them lesbians, haha). That was just because it was cheaper, though, no one really cares if you have a date or not, and dances can be fun with friends too. Maybe even more fun, because there's less pressure to impress your date.

[soccer]

yea im thinking about goin with one of my girl friends. i was just so crushed. and yes at my school it has to be a boy girl couple to get in i hate that so much.

[Miss Sarah]

What kind of school has a boy-girl couple rule! That's high order discrimination against homosexuals, social misfits and the highly unattractive. Rude.

Why don't you approach her father, and in a very respectful manner, ask if you can take his daughter. It is much easier to say no to your daughter than to say no to a polite young man who demonstrates only the best of interests in his daughter.

[soccer]

A private catholic school has that kind of rule and yes i agree its cruel and discriminating but it still is a great school because of the education and its open to all people from different religions. And i would talk to her dad but she lives about 45 min a way from me and trust me i cannot talk on the phone for my life.

[Miss Sarah]

I went to a private Catholic school as well... How strange!

Hm, Well. If the girl really means all that much to you... 45 minutes isn't that far.

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

If you can't talk to her dad, see if she will, but make some real effort to talk to him yourself. I don't know ho oldw you guys are, does she drive or does someone maybe pick her up after school? If her dad gives her a ride before or after school, that could be an opportunity to run into her him if all else fails. Practice your phone conversation beforehand with a friend, or even with her. Work out what you want to say so you won't be so nervous. The worst he can say is no, which he's already said, so you really have nothing to lose. Talking to him in person would be best, but the phone is a second option. At the least, see if he'll let you guys go together provided that it's not a romantic affair. I don't think he'll change his mind on whether she's allowed to date or not, but going to the dance could be a more flexible issue.

[soccer]

thanks both of you for the great advice. i was feeling very down today and i really needed that optimism. i'm going to talk to her and see what she says about talking to her dad. thanks very much.

[Shalom]

Do what makes you happy. Yes she might like you, but she might not be the one for you at the MOMENT. I say ask someone else, deal with the issues later!

[Kaleidoscope Eyes]

No problemo. Good luck!