Not doing well (sorry)

[-Silence]

Tomorrow will be three whole weeks without cutting, but honestly I don't think I can make it that far. It seems so little, so pathetic but it's a big deal to me. These last three or four days I've been like living in an urge, constantly I've been pushing it away but it builds up. It's too much. Too much for me to keep pushing away.

It's strange, I'll wake up and the first thing I see is my scar-covered arms and thats why I want to reach for a razor because I want to bleed, I want to feel it, and then I want to feel the relief it brings. So I'll wear long sleeves so my arms aren't visible to me but still there's that place on my arm thats begging to be ripped open.

I just don't know how long before I give in, I'm so sorry.

[teenhelp]

your arms cannot physically make you do anything to yourself, youre the one that is doing that and you mentioned more than once that you "want" to do this, it's not like you are being forced to. hiding your arms isnt going to solve the problems in your head, you need to see a psychiatrist

[-Silence]

There aren't any "problems in my head" I'm not some basketcase, okay? I've seen a psychiatrist but no, I don't want to live off of drugs.

I know they didn't physically make me do it, I know that I'm the one that did it, no one or nothing else. It's kinda what was leading to it, it's kinda the reason why I reached for the razor, why I fucked it all up.

I'm sorry, I had to rant, that's why I wrote, again - sorry.

[TehBovril]

I know exactly howyou feel. i get the exact same urges when looking at my scars. Its a pain in the ass and it drives you crazy andevery now an then your gonna explode but you've just got to keep resisting and it will take a long time but you can do it. It's been exactly a month for me. =]

[DouggyO.o]

i have faught those same earges, if u satay positive you CAN stop, its been about a year and 3-4 months for me...

[kolte]

Just stop thinking about hun, just get it out of your head, enjoy life, look at it differently, be happy, rejoice because you are alive look at this beautiful word adn thrive!

[TehBovril]

Just stop thinking about hun, just get it out of your head, enjoy life, look at it differently, be happy, rejoice because you are alive look at this beautiful word adn thrive!

Aww, i really like that. Very emotive. Can i have permission to put that on my hope board?

[kolte]

sure you can

[TehBovril]

why thank you. It may have to go at teh top of the inspirational qoutes list =]

[Rooster]

The trick to breaking habits is to aim at something that's not directly the habit it's self. Like doing it in memory of someone who's passed away, or to accomplish a dream, or to prove a point. You just need to aim and apply yourself. Now, I'm not saying it's easy. I'm not even saying I've ever had your habit, but I helped someone beat it.

[ZeppelinFan13]

i use to cut last year because my life was shit. what i did to stop it is me and about 7 of my friends made this thing we called bear claw where we basically would set up fights and just beat the shit out of each other. sounds gay i know but it hleped us relieve pain and stress, and it never got out of hand. you should try something like that. p-out

[Bobby]

Is this supporting self harm?

Your post had nothing to do with this topic really....

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[Whisper]

Unnesesary lock

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