gorilla18
September 17th, 2009, 04:49 PM
About a month ago, I got a bit more intimate with a girl and we wanted to have sex. When me made out a couple of times before I got an erection from just making out, but this time we were lying in our underwear in a bed and I just couldn't got it hard. I know why. When the foreplay reached the end I started to think: "This is it, I'm gonna have my first sex," and silly stuff like that. It just came to my mind and didn't go away. Then I noticed that I got a bit turned off by the though. Hence my erection faded a tiny bit, but enough that I noticed it. And then it began: the thought of my erection fading away just didn't want to go away and finally I totally lost it. My girlfriend was very understanding but still I was very ashamed and disappointed in myself. Then the next morning we tried to have sex again, but again my penis wouldn't get erected hardly, because of mild performance anxiety and of course the thought "you're getting soft," running through my mind.
The thing is, I got a rock solid erection about two months ago when I was lying in my underpants with another girl, we were making out, but she said she just wasn't ready and she meant it. Now after awhile I was thinking a lot about my problem and it seemed silly to me. But recently I learned that my friend is having a house party *tomorrow* and the girl, with whom we tried to have sex, is going to be there (oh yes, we stopped dating... I felt too embarrassed and afraid of trying to have sex again with her). This means I'm going to have an opportunity to have sex with her again (she's still fond of me), but I'm kind of afraid of it. Today when I tried to masturbate by thinking of her I remembered that thought of being soft, and I could not get an erection. This made me even more afraid of tomorrow's night and unable to get erection at that time. She's very attractive in my opinion and I just want to have careless sex with sex, that's all. But being afraid of the evil thought makes the very same thought emerge and destroy my erection. This is almost paradoxical and the final question is: how to not to think about that thought? I know and am aware of my ability to have sex, but I guess not enough to completely suppress the evil thought. I know that only because of thinking about it I get soft, but my problem is that I can't put that thought away and I know it's going to reappear when I try to have sex tomorrow (or any other time).
Thanks a world,
gorilla
The thing is, I got a rock solid erection about two months ago when I was lying in my underpants with another girl, we were making out, but she said she just wasn't ready and she meant it. Now after awhile I was thinking a lot about my problem and it seemed silly to me. But recently I learned that my friend is having a house party *tomorrow* and the girl, with whom we tried to have sex, is going to be there (oh yes, we stopped dating... I felt too embarrassed and afraid of trying to have sex again with her). This means I'm going to have an opportunity to have sex with her again (she's still fond of me), but I'm kind of afraid of it. Today when I tried to masturbate by thinking of her I remembered that thought of being soft, and I could not get an erection. This made me even more afraid of tomorrow's night and unable to get erection at that time. She's very attractive in my opinion and I just want to have careless sex with sex, that's all. But being afraid of the evil thought makes the very same thought emerge and destroy my erection. This is almost paradoxical and the final question is: how to not to think about that thought? I know and am aware of my ability to have sex, but I guess not enough to completely suppress the evil thought. I know that only because of thinking about it I get soft, but my problem is that I can't put that thought away and I know it's going to reappear when I try to have sex tomorrow (or any other time).
Thanks a world,
gorilla