Cant do this!!

[Beautiful Obsession]

it happened again, my nans "husband" did it again. doesnt he realise I HAVE FUCKING FEELINGS?!

Sittin there, watchin him scoffing ice cream down his throat while staring at my boobs, and smiling, i felt sick wanted to scream, run and never look back, of corse things arnt that simple.

we went to my nans house, she took the dog for a walk, when i asked to go withher, she said no, to sit down, she wont be long, alot can happen in a short amount of time!

first, he looked at me, asked to "touch" me, obv i said no, but he sat by me, pulled my top down, my bra down and touched me, right now, im crying, cant stop, goosebumps frm head to toe.

he asked to touchh down below, (sorry cnt say what i wanna, feel ashamed) i said no, plus im on my period, didnt stop him, next he got "it" out, i pushed him off me. starting sayin no, im on my period, he said, fine, touch it instead, didnt matter wot i said he made me..

next minute hes lyin on top of me, lucky for me, he didnt make me pull down my trousers, but he said YOU OW ME! i ow him???? again I HAVEE FUCKING FEELINGS!! doesnt make me feel better thoughh.. still hes lyin on top of me.. i cudnt push him off, no matter how hard i tried. cudnt..

wen he finally got off me, he pulled my top down again..

then.. the fuckin cheek.. HE CHUCKED ME A FIVER!!

COULDNT BELIEVEE IT!! i feel so ashamed of myself, of my body, cant stop crying.. why is it mee? why did this have to happen to me,

this time was the worst, its relli hit me, im not a little girl anymore, i cant let it happen, i wanna cut so hard. i wana diee, never wake up, at least this never ending nightmare will end..

[Aηdy]

Fucking hell Hollie. This is real bad now. Someone MUST have to find out about him. The sick cunt needs locking up. This CANNOT happen again. I know you must be feeling pretty shit right now. But for the love of god don't cave in, you're going so well. You're not going to let some twat rouin it for you are you?

I really don't know what else to say, I'm fucking angry at him.

If there's anything, ANYTHING you need then you know where i am.

[wavey]

it happened again, my nans "husband" did it again. doesnt he realise I HAVE FUCKING FEELINGS?!

Sittin there, watchin him scoffing ice cream down his throat while staring at my boobs, and smiling, i felt sick wanted to scream, run and never look back, of corse things arnt that simple.

we went to my nans house, she took the dog for a walk, when i asked to go withher, she said no, to sit down, she wont be long, alot can happen in a short amount of time!

first, he looked at me, asked to "touch" me, obv i said no, but he sat by me, pulled my top down, my bra down and touched me, right now, im crying, cant stop, goosebumps frm head to toe.

he asked to touchh down below, (sorry cnt say what i wanna, feel ashamed) i said no, plus im on my period, didnt stop him, next he got "it" out, i pushed him off me. starting sayin no, im on my period, he said, fine, touch it instead, didnt matter wot i said he made me..

next minute hes lyin on top of me, lucky for me, he didnt make me pull down my trousers, but he said YOU OW ME! i ow him???? again I HAVEE FUCKING FEELINGS!! doesnt make me feel better thoughh.. still hes lyin on top of me.. i cudnt push him off, no matter how hard i tried. cudnt..

wen he finally got off me, he pulled my top down again..

then.. the fuckin cheek.. HE CHUCKED ME A FIVER!!

COULDNT BELIEVEE IT!! i feel so ashamed of myself, of my body, cant stop crying.. why is it mee? why did this have to happen to me,

this time was the worst, its relli hit me, im not a little girl anymore, i cant let it happen, i wanna cut so hard. i wana diee, never wake up, at least this never ending nightmare will end..



This must be very hard for you, i hope it works out.
You need to confront your mam or dad about this now! the person you trust most... it needs to be stopped. even going to the police will help.. just someone.. maybe childline?

You can live your life with this. i would say get it stopped


Really, the next post i want you to make should be positive, you should get him stopped before he does it again.

[Ortizitthisone]

You can't let this happen! You have to go to someone. A family member, a friend, a friend's parent, a teacher, a school counselor, the police department. You can't let him get away with this. You have to be strong and be brave, you have to muster up the courage to stop this.

[Beautiful Obsession]

thanks guys:)

but tbh, i cnt tell anyone, iv tried.. fuckin hell iv tried, sorry bouthe language, but everytime it think about it, write about it, i cry, breakdown or cut, right now im cryin..

i hate for what iv become, i want to stop him ,but it seems impossible, i know all i have to do is tell, but i cnt, i feel ashamed to tel anyone my dark secret, its only been me who has known about it since i was 3. 11 years, not so easy.

[Aηdy]

I could never imagine how hard it is going to be for you to tell someone. But there is no reason on earth that you should feel ashamed about it. It's not your fault, you have done nothing wrong. You are the victim. Once people find out, this will never ever happen again, you can move on with your life. Please Hollie, for you own sake tell someone. It doesn't matter if you break down in tears, once someone knows that there is something wrong they'd get it out of you.

[Discomposure]

Hollie, i've told you a lot on msn about what you should do, but no matter how many times you get told you need to tell won't make much difference, your going to do it in your own time.
Until then, I'm here if you need to talk. I can't imagine what it's like for you. You'll find your strength one day...
xx

[Triceratops]

Look, putting this bluntly, you need to tell someone.
I am not suggesting or asking you to do so, I am telling you.
This is down to YOU to inform someone before this causes far more damage than it already has.

Judging by your posts, this has gone on for a very long time, although I'm not particularly sure if anyone else in your life is aware of the ordeal. I'm not trying to be strict, I really understand how difficult it is for you to confess about this, but with the forced strength and courage you can go far with it. You can do this if you try. However, this man needs a firm punishment and to be locked up. I strongly advise you to go down to your local police station and notify them about these occurances.

This isn't your fault, you have no need to feel disgusting, ashamed or worthless. This man is somewhat of a monster and this absolutely is desperate need of dealing with. It's now down to you to step down and pluck up the courage to tell someone (preferably a teacher, social services, police) of high authority to solve this once and for all. This man shouldn't get away with this. Confessing is one of the hardest parts, so once you've told someone things are going to be dealt with properly.

Good luck. <3

[Darkness]

You need help, there's no way you can bring this bastard down alone, your not alone in this. This has gone on far too long, this man is not going to stop. You should tell someone. You have done nothing wrong.

[Ortizitthisone]

Hollie,
Sexual predators feed on their victims' fear and vulnerability. You cannot let this monster do this any more. You have to stop him.

Hollie, you have a RIGHT to lead a healthy life. You have a RIGHT to be happy.

This man has NO RIGHT to do this to you, or anyone else. You cannot let this continue. This man preyed on you, took advantage of you, stole something from you. You are the victim here, and there is no one in this world who will see it any differently. What is happening is a result of a sick man, one that has no right to exist on this earth, and one that will continue to do this until he is stopped. This is NOT your fault. You are the only one who can stop him.

You did not bring this on yourself. You had no control over its start, but what you do have control over is when it stops. It isn't going to be easy to talk to someone in authority about this, but you owe it to yourself to make it so that this man can NEVER hurt you again.

I'm around if you want to talk. Please don't hesitate to PM me, or find me on AIM or Skype (on my profile).

[Truth]

I can't understand why you can't tell some one. Does being abused make you no longer think logically? ( No offense )

[Ortizitthisone]

Truth, I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt here, especially because you're apparently only 13.

Being abused is not something that you can truly understand unless and until you've been through it.

To answer your question, yes, it does alter a person's thinking. Especially for long-term abuse victims. Often, they've been conditioned either to believe that the abuse is normal, that it's something everyone goes through, or that the abuse is their fault. Neither of these are true.

However, this thread is about Hollie.X, and I personally think you might want to choose your words more carefully next time.

[just-another-guy]

You gotta tell someone like that's just to damm close to call you gotta let someone know and try your best to not be alone with him stay with someone when you see him and avoid him as much as you can that's just not righttt not right at all he needs help you really need to tell someone about this

[Truth]

Truth, I'm going to give you the benefit of the doubt here, especially because you're apparently only 13.

Being abused is not something that you can truly understand unless and until you've been through it.

To answer your question, yes, it does alter a person's thinking. Especially for long-term abuse victims. Often, they've been conditioned either to believe that the abuse is normal, that it's something everyone goes through, or that the abuse is their fault. Neither of these are true.

However, this thread is about Hollie.X, and I personally think you might want to choose your words more carefully next time. You talk to me like im clueless. It's just she's been told so many times by so many people to tell some one.

[Ortizitthisone]

I didn't say you were clueless, I'm just saying that you shouldn't presume to know what someone else thinking or how they're feeling, or how easy you think it would be to tell someone about this.

[Triceratops]

I didn't say you were clueless, I'm just saying that you shouldn't presume to know what someone else thinking or how they're feeling, or how easy you think it would be to tell someone about this.

She has been told numerous amounts of times to tell someone. Do not think for a minute that I'm clueless on the matter, in fact I sincerely know it must be incredibly hard for someone in that situation to do so, but does that mean they shouldn't push themselves to try and end this? Absolutely not.

Sometimes firmly advising someone to do a certain thing can really sink in when the time comes to properly draw the line and act accordingly. You really need to ensure the victim knows the exact consequences when they have the ability to tell someone yet they truly feel they can not do so.

Most abuse victims feel powerless. Sometimes they think by speaking up about the matter is "grassing up" or they're being a telltale. They even believe the abuse can worsen by telling someone, when in fact reality is quite the opposite. When a person of somewhat high authority such as a teacher or police officer discovers the child is a victim of abuse they will no doubtedly deal with the situation immediately.

No matter what ordeal you go through in life, you always have the power to fight back and help things get better for yourself with determination and to be willing to try hard enough. Things won't get better on thier own, you NEED to act yourself otherwise you'll be more than likely stuck in a hellhole for an even longer period of time. Sitting back with with little effort, little motivation and convinced thoughts of weakness, powerlessness and worthlessness will continue to encourage the ordeal to become even harder than it already is. There is only so much other people can do to help if the victim really struggles to speak out. The more the victim is aware that they desperately need to tell someone, the more likely they probably will want to do so. They just really deserve a strong advisement and encouragement to do this because this is a huge step for them to take.

[Ortizitthisone]

For the record, I wasn't saying that people shouldn't be firmly advised to do the right thing and tell someone, I was just saying that it's obvious how difficult it must be. I also meant that Truth's post was not really constructive at all, and I took personal offense to it, even though it wasn't directed at me.

You'll notice from my previous posts in this thread that I agree with you 100% on what should be done by the OP.

[Beautiful Obsession]

thanks guyss, i think im gunna tel sum1, i know i need to,and if i dont, its guna carry on..

[AllThatIsLeft]

*insert 3 rows of insane swearing!!!*

Hollie, hun, Listen to me. and the rest of the people here. You NEED to tell, honestly I'm a bit scared for you. I get the feeling your nan isn't too out of the loop, and this is just fucking wrong.

For your sake, for your mental stability i implore you that you let out to your parents, this is disgusting and wrong, and that man needs to be locked away. You don't need to go through this. I, as an abuse victim feel repulsed to the degree that I want to go there and beat this bastard dead.

Hollie please, please don't jsut say you will, YOU MUST.
Do it for yourself, for me, and for every child that has ever been abused. One of those creeps down makes a difference.
Don't you want to live in peace, and not be afraid?

You have no idea what this will do to you in the long term, maybe you do now, but if it isn't stopped it will be much worse.

Hun, I know it's difficult, but it isn't YOUR dark secret. You are a victim, you have no say in this, please, please!! do it.

It doesn't have to go on, take courage and let it be known. Your reward will be so worth it.
please love, I'm begging you. Only you can do it.

[Ortizitthisone]

There is only one person that can stop this, Hollie, and that's you. Remember, you have a right to be happy and live peacefully. Telling someone and getting away from this man (if he can really be called a man) will probably be one of the hardest things you ever do, I don't want to sugarcoat that, but I can guarantee you that it will also be the best decision you ever make. It's so important to get out of this situation and get on the road to recovering from this abuse.

[wavey]

it wont stop until you speak up hollie.x :)

I promise you with all of me, stuff will get better maybe not in the beginning but in the long run.

[Aηdy]

I think everyone should know that Hollie told one of her friends about it all today. I'm sure she'll explain later, but it might aid any further replies.

[Discomposure]

I think everyone should know that Hollie told one of her friends about it all today. I'm sure she'll explain later, but it might aid any further replies.


Yeah she did she told a friend :) It's great she's told someone but an adult needs to be informed. I'm glad I spoke to her about it now. :)

[Paladino]

You NEED to tell your family and/or more imporantly the police, so this sick perverted guy will get locked up.