Useless..

[Outofc]

I know that almost nobody knows me here, but I need help. For a long time now, I've been feeling worthless, and I'm pretty sure I am. I've been feeling like I should just go die, and nobody would care at all. That it would even make some people happy. I decided to give it time, and things are getting worse every day. I've been honestly considering suicide for quite a while now, and each day I seem to be getting closer to finally just giving up. I really, really don't want to tell my parents about this. The reason behind that would take a long time to explain, it's not just because I'm nervous. I don't trust my friend enough to tell him all about this, and I'm home schooled, thus meaning I have no school counselors. I just feel so hopeless, so many things that could have gone wrong did. I can't find a purpose anywhere, my parents want me to be something I will never be, and I just can't handle this stress anymore. What the hell am I supposed to do?

[PoisonedRazorBlades]

You are not worthless and although you feel like nobody would care if you died, they would. You are not alone in feeling like this. I've attempted suicide before and I've had all these thoughts too. If you don't feel like you can talk to family or friends about this, how about phoning your doctor? He/she can refer you to a cousellor perhaps? It is hard to seek help, trust me I know this, but you've already took the first step by seeking it here. Feel free to PM me whenever, I will try my best to help you. All the best.

[differentduck]

I feel the EXACT same way. Only I go to public school and all except for one friends that I hang out with is autistic. Only mildly autistic. They are nice to me, and care about what I have to say. Anyway, I have also considered suicide. I live next to a busy highway. I figure when I finally lose it (I'm just about there) it will be the best way to, you know. I feel I can't talk to anybody because they'll either not care or care lots, and send to someone who I'll assume listens to enough life stories and won't give a crap about mine and then I'll feel really guilty if it cost lots of money and didn't help me, and then I will be back to square one. Sorry if anyone thinks I shouldn't have wrote this. I'm probably doing something wrong. It sorta feels good to get it off my chest though. Please don't get mad. Now I feel really bad. Sorry sorry sorry. And Outofc, I know just how you feel. And I wish I could help. Sorry. Again.

[Outofc]

You are not worthless and although you feel like nobody would care if you died, they would. You are not alone in feeling like this. I've attempted suicide before and I've had all these thoughts too. If you don't feel like you can talk to family or friends about this, how about phoning your doctor? He/she can refer you to a cousellor perhaps? It is hard to seek help, trust me I know this, but you've already took the first step by seeking it here. Feel free to PM me whenever, I will try my best to help you. All the best.
But you don't know that. I can't think of one person who would be that upset if I died. ..One. : \ But he can't direct me to a counselor without my parents finding out. I highly doubt I could go secretly, most counselors don't attend to thirteen year olds, and you have to pay for them.
Thanks for trying to help. I might need to pm sometime.

I feel the EXACT same way. Only I go to public school and all except for one friends that I hang out with is autistic. Only mildly autistic. They are nice to me, and care about what I have to say. Anyway, I have also considered suicide. I live next to a busy highway. I figure when I finally lose it (I'm just about there) it will be the best way to, you know. I feel I can't talk to anybody because they'll either not care or care lots, and send to someone who I'll assume listens to enough life stories and won't give a crap about mine and then I'll feel really guilty if it cost lots of money and didn't help me, and then I will be back to square one. Sorry if anyone thinks I shouldn't have wrote this. I'm probably doing something wrong. It sorta feels good to get it off my chest though. Please don't get mad. Now I feel really bad. Sorry sorry sorry. And Outofc, I know just how you feel. And I wish I could help. Sorry. Again.

I don't think you're doing something wrong posting this, even though it doesn't help, I guess it's good to know that I'm not alone in feeling like this.
I still have no idea what to do, it feels like I'm just getting worse by the hour..: \

[Flutterfly]

Matthew! I would care if you died, you've been my friend for so long now. Giving up isn't the answer for sure, you should try and build up your relationship with your friend IRL so that you can talk to him, I think that would really help. I know how it is when you can't get a counselor, but the people here are very supportive, and now you're going to have loads of people from here caring for you.

[Outofc]

Matthew! I would care if you died, you've been my friend for so long now. Giving up isn't the answer for sure, you should try and build up your relationship with your friend IRL so that you can talk to him, I think that would really help. I know how it is when you can't get a counselor, but the people here are very supportive, and now you're going to have loads of people from here caring for you.

: [ I don't know why, it just doesn't feel like it anybody would, including you. That might sound mean, but I didn't mean for it to be. I don't know why I feel that way..
I'm just so scared that he'll tell my parents. Or that he'll tell somebody. I can try to trust him more, but it's not as easy as it sounds. Even if I have somebody that cares, I just can't control these thoughts, it's like all I can think about right now is just putting all of this to an end. What's wrong with me?

[Flutterfly]

It doesn't mean anything is wrong with you. If you've read anything on this site you'd know tons of people feel this way too. And I didn't say flat out try and trust him, I said build the relationship so you can trust him. Putting an end to it doesn't have to put end to your life, find another way to putan end to the suffering, not one that causes more. People do care.

[Outofc]

Honestly, since I last posted this, things have just gotten worse. I'm this close to doing something to change this..
How, how do I get help? I really need it right now. : {

[thrash13]

hey, first off :P please dont do anything to yourself, i can kinda relate to how you are feeling, i know it sucks but "ending it" is not the way to go, weather you know it or not there are ppl that care about you and dont wanna see, i wanna try my best best to help you out, if you want me to help i will, i have a few IMs, and an email i really wanna help you out

[MysticalBurrito]

Matt please don't do anything to harm yourself
You're a really special person and if you need anyone to talk to I'm here or you can talk to your parents
As much as it may seem about parents not knowing how their children feel at time they were teenagers to at a point in their life.

[Outofc]

hey, first off :P please dont do anything to yourself, i can kinda relate to how you are feeling, i know it sucks but "ending it" is not the way to go, weather you know it or not there are ppl that care about you and dont wanna see, i wanna try my best best to help you out, if you want me to help i will, i have a few IMs, and an email i really wanna help you out

The thing is, I can't see any way this could possibly end. The only way out I really see right now is ridding my self..
Er, okay. My msn is in my profile, you can add me there. Thanks for wanting to help.

Matt please don't do anything to harm yourself
You're a really special person and if you need anyone to talk to I'm here or you can talk to your parents
As much as it may seem about parents not knowing how their children feel at time they were teenagers to at a point in their life.

Thanks for the offer. By the way, I can't speak to my parents. They have the complete opposite opinion of me, they still don't know it yet. They constantly shove it down my throat, and I don't want to talk to them. Mainly because they are half the reason I'm depressed at the moment.