Is it weird?

[rarararah]

I read through the symptoms of depression and it seems like I might have it.. I don't want to think that I do though. Recently I found out my friend is moving away and I literally became depressed for three days straight. I just could not get it off my mind.
I've also suffered from low self-esteem for a very long time, and I pretty much get by on positive comments.

The odd thing is that when I became situationally depressed when I found out my friend was leaving, I did not want to be happy. I wanted to keep thinking about it and feel like crap about it.
Am I just being melodramatic?

[Corey G.]

Dude I have that exact same problem when I get depressed, its like I don't want to feel better, I just keep thinking about what is hurting me and get worse. =o But I usually realize after awhile that its not what I should be doing, and this is only harming me, and mainly thoughs around me, so I eventually stop and feel better about it. Oh and man I have a self-esteem problem too, but even though I have very little faith in myself, I put my faith in Christ, and know that he will always be there for me so I have nothing to worry about.

[scuba steve]

not really... depression affects everyone and can actually be a killer. i've been depressed quite a few times too like now most of my friends are turning into drug addicted ass holes. but you just have to plough on through and find some way to take your mind of it. no point wallowing in self-pity.

[rarararah]

Recently I've been really happy though. I'm kinda perplexed about it. Like during the whole school year I felt like shit, went through major ups and downs like every other week, and I might be able to accredit this to not doing as well as I could in school. I go to a school of smart (mostly booksmart) people and getting a bad grade will just make me feel like I can't do crap. I get into this mode where I feel really stupid, and end up putting myself down until something gets me into one of my highs. Problem is though, when I get into a high I tend to be very condescending and once I recognize this I fall right back down. I feel like I'm probably gonna repeat the same process once school starts back up.

[Fallen_embers]

I do the same thing. Everytime I get into this depressed state, it's like I want to be there, and I can accept that I'm not happy (but I wouldn't consider myself as depressed) and then I seem to have a happy day and wonder how I could possibly like feeling like shit.
And the grade thing you mentioned gets me too! I used to be pretty clever, got A's in my GCSE's but then for ALevel I get U's, and it really knocks me down because everyone else doesn't struggle and gets A's and B's. I'm just sick of the dramatic moods :P

But maybe you have some sort of "bipolar" type thing, I'm in no way comparing it to bi-polar as I have never experienced it and I don't know much about it, so don't take my word for it. but I mean you'r last post, the mood cycles you mentioned, like the mood cycles people who suffer from bipolar get =/

I didn't mean that to sound offensive or judgemental or anything, and if it's offended anybody I'm really sorry, it was meant to :)

[rarararah]

No dude I take no offense. I always wonder what bi-polar people are like, but I never get any description matching anything I have.