do i have an ED?

[murderousflower]

okay, so most of my friends think i do. but i don't think its a disorder. I mean, i've read the signs &symptoms and all that stuff, and it doesn't seem to fully apply to me.
heres what's going on with me:
I hate eating anything. I'll eat if i have to, but as soon as it hits my stomach, I feel like a failure, and even if its just a little bit of food, I feel full immediately.
When i overeat, or feel full, or eat anything over 100 cals, I feel that I must throw it up. Sometimes I can, but other times i can't because of where i am.
If I'm at home, i want to be outside so bad, because i feel like staying inside is making me lazy and I'll get fatter than i am.
I AM over weight. and thats according to medical charts.

I call it my diet. I've been on it for about 8 or 9 months. And I havent lost much due to people telling me "have a problem and should recover".

do i have one?

[Syvelocin]

I'm not an expert, and it might be considered an eating disorder, but I've seen it before. I don't feel like that myself, I just refuse to eat unless I can't take it anymore.

I would recommend teaching your body to eat though. Each week, choose a slightly higher calorie intake. Start with a week of eating 300 calories a day, then 400, etc. You don't have to eat that little to lose weight. Burning about 500 calories a week is around one pound, so if you ate 500 calories less than your body's "requirement" a week, you supposedly will lose a pound a week.

I also notice if I just eat vegetables and fruits I feel at least healthier, instead of going and choosing some kind of frozen meal for my 400 calories. For some reason i feel like I eat less with vegetables and fruits, though I'm actually eating more than my body thinks I am.

[hereitgoes]

"I hate eating anything." "I feel full immediately."
i read those two lines and thought that maybe you don't have an eating disorder (emotional) but rather some other physical disorder causing you to not be able to eat much.

"I'll eat if i have to." "I feel like a failure." "anything over 100 cals." "I feel that I must throw it up." "i feel like staying inside is making me lazy and I'll get fatter than i am." "I call it my diet."



it sounds to me that you have EDNOS (Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified.) it's what i have. you don't have all symptoms to be considered anoretic or bulimic but rather a mixture between the two. if you haven't lost much weight, you probably still can easily overcome this, but the longer you wait, the more pounds you drop, and the faster you drop them, the more addicting it will get. eating disorders are DISEASES. one of my favorite anorexia quotes is, "i have an eating disorder. yeah, right. more like my ED has ME." if you get diagnosed, your life is living hell. you're forced to go to mental hospitals, and in the case where your ED gets so bad that you can't be helped, you can be sent to an institution for life.

it's NOT a diet. it's NOT a game. it's NOT a joke. it WILL fxck up your life, permanently. i suggest either trying to lose weight in a healthy way or seeking help as soon as possible. you don't have to, you can continue doing this, but an eating disorder becomes your life, you lose your friends, everything and everyone you care about, eventually your life, sanity, or your sense of who you are, and the only thing you're left with is the hope that one day you'll be perfect. you'll never be perfect enough, though.

an ED is living hell. something you hate so much and desperately want to leave behind you, but also something you can't live without. once you have it, you'll never get rid of it. you can recover 5 times and relapse yet again.
sorry this was long, but please, seek help and medical advice. (don't rely on all of this information to be true as i am not a professional and cannot replace one.)

[murderousflower]

thanks. you're probably right, but i'm not ready to stop yet. I have a goal. And i'll stop when i reach it. This is completely temporary. once i reach my goal, I'll find out if something is physically wrong with me. Like if my stomach is messed up or something and causes me to feel full. I just feel that as long as it works, it worth it. I don't even look like i have a disorder, in fact, pretty much the opposite.

[hereitgoes]

well, in my opinion, things like self harm, starvation, drugs, all that jazz is wrong and can easily lead to suicide, but i do not think that suicide should be illegal. you can make your own choices, but i must add that almost all eating disordered people say they'll stop when they reach a certain weight, but they get there and decide just a few more pounds. you can keep doing that until you're skin and bones and still look in the mirror and think, "just a few more pounds." this method of weight loss is extremely dangerous, but if you are still going to decide to do it then i have no right to stop you as i have an ED myself.

[Antares]

I mean, as far as the Anorexia, Bulemia, etc. No. You don't have the correct symptoms that corresponds with that. I think that Taylor (I think thats your name :P) is spot on with the EDNOS.

Its initially psychological but then your body...starts to...really take over if you understand what I mean. If this is starting to interfere with your life as in, you are starting to get sick, people are telling you you are too skinny, you are always thinking about not eating food, or how youre full, eating, etc. then you probably need to tell your parents that you want to get help.
So I think thats the best route out. For the time being, you need to start eating healthy. You will start getting deficiencies and that will lead to more problems down the road. Your body is growing and needs its essentials.
Try to make sure you eat your essential food groups (more than just fruits and vegetables) everyday. Instead of thinking about intaking crap, think about how much your body needs it and how happy it will be (your body, not your mind) :)

I hope this remotely helped :P

Good luck :D

[hereitgoes]

^ yes, it's Taylor(:

and he's right about the deficiencies. even if i try to eat right, my mind has taken so much control over me that i don't even remember how much a normal person is supposed to eat. i have a feeling that the meal size i consider normal is about 1/5 of a suggested meal size, plus, a lot of this behavior leads to OCD. people make fun of me all the time for the way i sort my food, and all the strange patterns i have to eat it in. some days, when i get up to go to school, i have a hard time walking to my door, let alone getting up the stairs and getting to school. i completely black out nearly everytime i stand up. i have trouble concentrating and remembering what i was going to say. i can't ever lay down and do nothing. i get 4 hours a sleep a night, if i'm lucky, because i wake up 7 times or more every night. i figet all the time, i'm nervous around people, i can't eat or drink in public, i'm afraid at times to drink water because i fear water weight, and i feel like i'm tired all the time even though i can't sleep. i've passed out before, most of the time i'm at school. the first time i was on the risers in some stupid play. i've been hospitalized once, faked my way out and didn't learn anything.
if i could stop this, i swear i would but once you get it you aren't turning back. ask nearly anyone who has an ED. you do not want one, or want it to get worse, trust me.