Underage Sex

[Reality]

I don't think there should be a "legal" sex age if two people underage (in some places 16, in others 18) because it can't really be enforced. I mean it should be kept if someone over 18 were to have sex with a 13 year old, but other than that, I don't really believe in a legal sex age, if both people are a similar age.

How do you enforce a law like that if two underaged people have sex? It's stupid.

Discuss.

[JackOfClubs]

Well, as long as both are under 18 and around the same age, I don't think there should be a sex law. Its fine as long as they both know the dangers.

[Zephyr]

Teens are going to have sex, that's a given.

I'm more so for the 3-year age difference rule,
If there is a/are minor(s) involved in the act,
There can be a 3-year age gap and it's considered okay.

I mean, looking at it from a parent's perspective,
No, I wouldn't want my kid having sex.
But you know that it's more than likely going to happen statistically,
So why not just promote safe sex to underagers?

I think about 4 years ago, the school board shot down a proposal to put condom distributors in the boy's restrooms,
And took away the student's right to go to the nurse or a counselor for condoms.
Result: My year had the highest pregnancy rate in school history, ever.
And the year behind us at a close 2nd.

Ya. There's your results of supporting abstinence over safe sex.

[Modus Operandi]

Teens are going to have sex, that's a given.

I'm more so for the 3-year age difference rule,
If there is a/are minor(s) involved in the act,
There can be a 3-year age gap and it's considered okay.

I mean, looking at it from a parent's perspective,
No, I wouldn't want my kid having sex.
But you know that it's more than likely going to happen statistically,
So why not just promote safe sex to underagers?

I think about 4 years ago, the school board shot down a proposal to put condom distributors in the boy's restrooms,
And took away the student's right to go to the nurse or a counselor for condoms.
Result: My year had the highest pregnancy rate in school history, ever.
And the year behind us at a close 2nd.

Ya. There's your results of supporting abstinence over safe sex.

Epiphany, thank you so much for adding some sanity and logic to the otherwise crazy world of the abstinence vs. safe sex debate.

Now on to the point. I see no reason why two consenting minors should not be allowed to have sex. However, I think there is a problem when someone over 20-ish or so and a minor want to have sex, just too large an age gap.
And before the hypocrisy police jump all over this post, let me make clear that an age restriction of 3 or less years of difference between the minors is the way to go.

[Rutherford The Brave]

let me make clear that an age restriction of 3 or less years of difference between the minors is the way to go.

Yeah I mean, kids who are together for a while and are comfortable and mature enough to handle sex. Should be able to have sex, but when a 20 year old man/woman tries to get sex from a 17 year old its just not right.

[ackmedsgirl666]

i have a question about this
my boyfriend/FWB w.e u wanna call him is 14 yrs old and a virgin
we want to have sex but im afraid of the age and that i can possibly get charged because im 16
can i be charged or is perfectly safe for us to do it?

[Rutherford The Brave]

i have a question about this
my boyfriend/FWB w.e u wanna call him is 14 yrs old and a virgin
we want to have sex but im afraid of the age and that i can possibly get charged because im 16
can i be charged or is perfectly safe for us to do it?

I would worry to much about it, I mean no one will charge you and to be honest, your both minors its not like your an adult having sex with a minor

[ackmedsgirl666]

yeah true
its just that i'm being told by the staff in my group home and my RENTS that if i have sex with him and his parents find out that they can charge me
thats why me and him have stayed abstinent so far :)

[Rutherford The Brave]

yeah true
its just that i'm being told by the staff in my group home and my RENTS that if i have sex with him and his parents find out that they can charge me
thats why me and him have stayed abstinent so far :)

While that is true, I've never really seen it happen. If you two are truly mature and ready then be protected and do it. You don't have to tell them.

[Reality]

i have a question about this
my boyfriend/FWB w.e u wanna call him is 14 yrs old and a virgin
we want to have sex but im afraid of the age and that i can possibly get charged because im 16
can i be charged or is perfectly safe for us to do it?
What is the age of consent there? If it's 16, he's a minor and you're not, and if it's like 18, you're both underage anyway.

[nick]

All age restrictions are arbitrary, its just a number. It doesn't make for something to be wrong if your 15 years + 364 days old but not wrong a day later.

Having said that the law is there to protect young people. Certainly if 2 kids both under the age of 16 have sex in the UK they're not going to get prosecuted for it, but it makes sense to have the law there to protect impressionable young kids from devious older ones and from adults.

[ackmedsgirl666]

here in canada its 16
hes 14 thats why i was concerned about the age difference

[Reality]

here in canada its 16
hes 14 thats why i was concerned about the age difference
Well, in theory, if somebody wanted to, they could take it seriously and you could be in trouble for it, even if he's 101% willing. It's very unlikely, though.

[Hyper]

In here a 25 year old can have sex with a 14 year old...

[Bougainvillea]

Epiphany is 100% right on spot!

[YourFriend]

It's 14 here in Croatia, so thankfully, i don't have to worry.

[Cromm]

can i be charged or is perfectly safe for us to do it?

Actually, the age of consent here in Canada is 14! There has been disscussion (http://www.parl.gc.ca/information/library/PRBpubs/prb993-e.htm) in recent years to raise it to 16, but such legislation has yet to pass, to my knowledge.




Anyway, regarding age of consent in general, OP says there shouldn't be any law with regard to two people under 18... but that's wrong. What happens when you get two people, ages 12 and 17? Shouldn't that be illegal?

What if a 14 y/o convinces an 8 y/o that he's babysitting to perform sexual acts on him? Isn't that molestation? Shouldn't that be punishable?

You HAVE to have consent laws, period. You can argue about where to draw the lines, but you can't say they shoudn't be there at all!

:yes:

[Sapphire]

The age of consent exists because while we are growing up we do not have the ability to completely comprehend the full implications of a sexual relationship. To abolish such a thing and replace it with a "three year age gap" rule would be ludicrus.

[Reality]

The age of consent exists because while we are growing up we do not have the ability to completely comprehend the full implications of a sexual relationship. To abolish such a thing and replace it with a "three year age gap" rule would be ludicrus.
You know actually.. hundreds of years ago, guys and girls would have sex, children and get married at 13-16 years old. Like during Shakespears era. I know it's because they had a shorter lifespan then, but still.

At 13-14 you're sexually mature, and many people can be emotionally mature, if they want to. ^^

[Sapphire]

You know actually.. hundreds of years ago, guys and girls would have sex, children and get married at 13-16 years old. Like during Shakespears era. I know it's because they had a shorter lifespan then, but still.

At 13-14 you're sexually mature, and many people can be emotionally mature, if they want to. ^^
The lifespan, living conditions, law, knowledge on individual development and societies norms have all changed since then and so it is a very different situation.

The fact of the matter is that while some people are "ready" to have sex before they reach the age of consent, there are others who aren't. These people need to be protected legally from people without any scruples. This is what the age of consent is in place for.

[Reality]

The lifespan, living conditions, law, knowledge on individual development and societies norms have all changed since then and so it is a very different situation.

The fact of the matter is that while some people are "ready" to have sex before they reach the age of consent, there are others who aren't. These people need to be protected legally from people without any scruples. This is what the age of consent is in place for.
True, but the law's almost impossible to enforce anyway. I have yet to see anyone who's had underage smex with someone else who's underage that's been charged for it.

[Sapphire]

True, but the law's almost impossible to enforce anyway. I have yet to see anyone who's had underage smex with someone else who's underage that's been charged for it.
This thread contains a news story of an 8 and a 9 year old being charged with raping each other after having underage sex *Click here* (http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?t=17228&highlight=underage+sex+charged) so it does happen just not very often.

The law is there to protect the children and young teens who aren't able to fully comprehend everything that is involved with having sex and who, as a result, can't properly give consent.

[Bougainvillea]

This thread contains a news story of an 8 and a 9 year old being charged with raping each other after having underage sex *Click here* (http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?t=17228&highlight=underage+sex+charged) so it does happen just not very often.

The law is there to protect the children and young teens who aren't able to fully comprehend everything that is involved with having sex and who, as a result, can't properly give consent.

Ah, that's bad.


Underage sex is really something we can't prevent. During my stay in Texas, I saw bunches of pregnant teens. It was sad. And unfortunately...growing.

[Sapphire]

You are right, we can't put a stop to underage sex. But we need the law there to protect vulnerable parties in society.

[Cromm]

[...]The fact of the matter is that while some people are "ready" to have sex before they reach the age of consent, there are others who aren't. These people need to be protected legally from people without any scruples. Yes, but protected from whom, exactly? If two 15y/o's mutually consent to sexual relations, it's entirely plauseable they aren't emotionally ready for it; but should they be punished under the law? NO! Of course not. You cannot, should not, attempt to legislate morality.

Now, if the ages were very different, then it means something different. When you have a drastic difference in maturity you, almost by nessisity, have a difference in power. It's the abuse of that power, of the strong over the weaker, that is inherently wrong. Which is exactly why teens can't consent to sex with adults, but in many jurisdictions can consent to sex with other teens.

Frankly, this is the way it should be.




[...]I have yet to see anyone who's had underage smex with someone else who's underage that's been charged for it.This thread contains a news story of an 8 and a 9 year old being charged with raping each other after having underage sex... That kind of ludicrous application of law is exactly why things need to be made more specific! True, two pre-teens shouldn't be allowed to sexualy experiment with each other for a number of reasons, but should they be charged under the law when they're eight and nine? NO!




... The law is there to protect the children and young teens who aren't able to fully comprehend everything that is involved with having sex and who, as a result, can't properly give consent. ...and in the case that you quoted, they are being protected from themselves? What kind of twisted law allows a person to be a rapist and a victim of rape for the same act?

[Sapphire]

Yes, but protected from whom, exactly? If two 15y/o's mutually consent to sexual relations, it's entirely plauseable they aren't emotionally ready for it; but should they be punished under the law? NO! Of course not. You cannot, should not, attempt to legislate morality.I did say in that quote that they need to be protected from people without any scruples.
Now, if the ages were very different, then it means something different. When you have a drastic difference in maturity you, almost by nessisity, have a difference in power. It's the abuse of that power, of the strong over the weaker, that is inherently wrong. Which is exactly why teens can't consent to sex with adults, but in many jurisdictions can consent to sex with other teens.

Frankly, this is the way it should be. Teenagers are different to children. If the age of consent wasn't in place then we would be saying that even 6 year old children can have sex and give their full consent which is just ridiculouus. But both groups are vulnerable and need to be protected from those of age who may take advantage.
That kind of ludicrous application of law is exactly why things need to be made more specific! True, two pre-teens shouldn't be allowed to sexualy experiment with each other for a number of reasons, but should they be charged under the law when they're eight and nine? NO!Oh, just looked over the story again and the 8 and the 9 year old did actually rape an 11 year old.
*shrugs* my bad.

[Brilliance]

I don't think there should be a legal age to have sex because no one really cares anyway.

What are they going to do, give you a fine for having sex?

In Australia it's 16, but that's only to cover there arses.

[Sapphire]

I don't think there should be a legal age to have sex because no one really cares anyway.Everyone cares about 8 year olds having sex regardless of who it's with so I must argue that you're wrong.

[Cromm]

Teenagers are different to children. If the age of consent wasn't in place then we would be saying that even 6 year old children can have sex and give their full consent which is just ridiculouus. Agreed; but where do you draw the line is the real question. As I've already said, there is no question that these laws -should- be in place, but how far should they go?

With age of consent laws in place, you have young people, child and teen alike, in the rather bizarre position of being victims and criminals for being sexual with someone of like age. This is just silly.

So what, then, is the alternative?

I ask you all.

[Sapphire]

Agreed; but where do you draw the line is the real question. As I've already said, there is no question that these laws -should- be in place, but how far should they go?A line has been drawn at 16. Personally, I feel this is a satisfactory place to draw the line.

With age of consent laws in place, you have young people, child and teen alike, in the rather bizarre position of being victims and criminals for being sexual with someone of like age. This is just silly.The law is there to protect the people who are not able to give consent - not to persecute those underage people who have sex with those of the same age when no one is hurt or taken advantage of. The law isn't making sense to you because you aren't looking at it's main purpose.

So what, then, is the alternative?

I ask you all.
We don't need an alternative.

[NeoKitai]

Full age of consent is 16 here, but there is a little hole that was found in the text that can allow people from the age of 12 to have legal sex.

The age depends on the younger partner and between the younger partner and the older partner (assuming the younger partner is 12 or 13) there must be a 2 year difference. If the younger partner if 14 or 15, then it can go up to a 5 year difference. As soon as the younger partner turns 16, there is no restriction on what age can they have sex with, just as long as it's legal. Meaning, this.

A 12 year old can have sex with people 12-14 years of age.
A 13 year old can have sex with people 12-15 years of age.
A 14 year old can have sex with people 12-19 years of age, although to not make people suspicious, try going 12-17 years of age.
A 15 year old can have sex with people 13-20 years of age, although to not make people suspicious, try going 13-17 years of age.
A 16+ year old can have sex with people 14-140 years of age.
A 18+ year old can have sex with people 14-140 years of age, less suspicion cast.

I say that this law if fine here, in Canada. It's also a very good item to use against the laws in this country.

[Sapphire]

*shakes head*
12 years old is too young!

[sebbie]

The law is there to protect younger people from being exploited for example a 20 year old having sex with a 14 year old is wrong in my opinion. The difference in mature would be huge depending on the age gaps.

However I am fairly sure that in the UK if someone is being charged for having under age sex they take the circumstances into account. eg a 15 year old and a 17 year old are having sex, this would be illegal but supposing they have been in a long term relationship, this would affect the outcome of any sentence...

[Cromm]

The law is there to protect the people who are not able to give consent - not to persecute those underage people who have sex with those of the same age when no one is hurt or taken advantage of. Again, I agree.

My problem twofold: The first is that some prosecutors are using the letter of the law to punish (or sometime just to 'send a message' to) young people who haven't done anything really wrong.

The other is that laws should leave no room for ambiguity, but those that are in place now do. Young people should be protected, no question there, but from whom? The existing laws sprit is in conflict with its letter.

The law isn't making sense to you because you aren't looking at it's main purpose. I hope I just proved you wrong about that. I understand its main purpose; its secondary effect is what I take issue with.

We don't need an alternative.I mean no hostiliy whatsoever when I say, I repectfully disagree.

*shakes head*
12 years old is too young! I completely agree. But I believe (when we're talking about people of like age, where no one was hurt) this is a parental matter, not one in which the state should be involved.

Full age of consent is 16 here, but there is a little hole that was found in the text that can allow people from the age of 12 to have legal sex... Do you have a link to an official site? I don't think that's the law where I live, but from your detailed discription, it sounds like it's better than what we have now, at least.

:)