Obsesring over how i self harm...

[derkderpderp]

Hey,im just going to get straight into this.However i beg of you not to judge too hastily as i can't make sense of it myself.

I've been self-harming for a while now,and recently i 'made' unspoken rules, such as how deep i make my incision,how long i leave it to bleed and how big the incisions are.
Im seemingly obsessed with how i S.H.

No im not proud,and no i did not deliberately make up these stupid rules,they just came to frutition.
I dont know what to do,its crazy how when i normally self harm i do it because i feel like shit,but now while i s.h for the same reason,im finding that i feel obliged to s.h in such a way that will provide optimum pain.

I dont know what to do,am i going crazy?oww
Please help!

[Triceratops]

We are not here to judge you.

You are not going crazy, self-harming doesn't make you crazy. The majority of self-harmers hurt themselves because they feel like shit and need a release through the pain given out from harming themselves.

Do you have any ways of preventing yourself from doing this? Do you make a sole effort to resist hurting yourself?

If you ever feel down, or the need to hurt yourself, think before doing it. Whenever you feel like this feel free to PM me to help or just to listen to you. I'm here if you need me.

[derkderpderp]

Thank you,and yeah i try my best not to self harm,i try to funnel my feelings into actions such as drawing/painting,observing nature to calm me down and writing short stories.
Those methods very rarely work.


Thank you for the advice.

[unexpected57]

you are definitely not crazy. most self-harmers have 'rituals' or 'rules' that they go through. most people know their limits therefore how deep they can go without going too deep, without letting it bleed too much. and as you do it more and more you can go further and further. most people go through this and you're not alone. i know i do it as well :)

i also get obsessed in another way and try to read everything try to see everything, watch movies, everything i can involving si. i spend hours online. i think its because i don't fully comprehend how i can possibly cut my skin open, for years and years. everyone 'obsesses' over things. don't worry about it.

[luciia96]

well, i think you should look for help,girl. I mean... you know, it's a seriouse problem... I know that there are moments in life when you feel like the world goes against you but... there are other ways to carry on with it, you have to be strong, because self-harming doesnt make your problems disappear. Why dont you tell a friend about how you feel? sometimes sharing our feelings help alot. Well, its up to you, but my advice is: face your problems and look for help.

Kiss!

[allsoulsareblack]

i dont i just cut as much an as fast as i can and loads i do i understand how u fell its sumthing u can control