How do you tell your friends that your not straight?

[DTeen]

I'm homosexual and its hard being around all of my guy friends because... well... yea. but i don't know if i tell them what their reaction would be if i told them and i don't know how i should tell them.
How do you tell your friends that your not straight? and if you have what was their reaction?

[Krafty]

Well, if you have to just tell them one by one and just explain that you like guys.

[JackOfClubs]

Well, if they are true, good friends, they won't mind. I would tell them one by one, though, as Krafty said.

[YourFriend]

It depends on your society. If yours is like mine where no one accepts gays then don't go out. There is no need to do so yet. You are still young and have allot of time in puberty ahead of you, that might be nothing but a phase, imagine that you go out as gay and turn out to be str8? Not a pleasent thought for sure.

[megan101]

i told all my friends and they didnt really mind, some of them even thought it was quite cool that i wasent afraid to say who i really am x

[The Harlequin]

i told all my friends and they didnt really mind, some of them even thought it was quite cool that i wasent afraid to say who i really am x

Whilst this is also fair advice do bear in mind that girls and guys react VERY differently to this kinda situation. With gay guys, girls tend to be more accepting and okay with it ~ at least in my society girls complain because they want a gay best friend.

With dudes it's different because it can be seen as they were your close friends and are now vulnerable to all kinds of abuse from being affiliated with you, to a good friend though, this shouldn't matter.

Some guys also have a very sheltered 'Man-and-woman=normal' perception of sexuality, mainly due to a lack of knowledge ~ humans fear what they don't understand.

If you want my opinion ~ wait.
Give it a while, your friends will mature and may surprise you with how well they deal with it ~ but that will be a little way off yet, there is no need to rush this and all it'll do is make things worse than is necessary.

Feeling awkward while closet is one thing, but risking the cold shoulder at such an early stage could result in disaster, so I think you should just have to bear it...

Alternatively you could drop subtle hints gradually, which might cushion the blow when you do tell them, and it also means that they have no immediate reason to fall out with you, lessening the chance of losing your mates (which is something every closet fears)

Ultimately though it is your choice...

Good luck!

[boysboysboys]

you can try asking your friends questions about other people that you and them think are gay. you can generally judge their character and how they will react to you being gay just by asking questions. dont make it obvious though.

also, be careful who you tell.

i was in a bad situation when i was first coming out. i go to an all boys school.
i told some of my 'friends' and they slammed me for it and spread it around my entire grade. my own best friend snitched on me and told them who i liked. those guys aren't my friends anymore.

so be careful

[bizarre]

"i told some of my 'friends' and they slammed me for it and spread it around my entire grade. my own best friend snitched on me and told them who i liked. those guys aren't my friends anymore."- boysboysboys



i greatly agree that happend to me but i told a girl and she told the entirer (i go to a small school 120 people) school so pick the people u tell wisley

[DjIntegrity]

I am not bi or gay so i don't exactly know if this will help but,

The way i see it there is 2 things you can do.

1.Be who you are and enjoy your life.
2.Be who your not and just pretend for your friends.

True friends will accept you, however if they are not truly your friends they can turn your life very miserable. If I was you I would test them first to see how they react. If they react in a way that you don't like then i would go with option 3.

3.Get rid of your friends and embrace new friends who will accept you.

[kyle66]

A good first step is to find a friend who you trust and tell them. Get them used to the idea and use them for support. Then, slowly, introduce the idea to the rest of your friends, the ones you trust the most first and go down the list. It is always a good idea to have that friend there when you tell them.

You may lose some friends but if they only liked you on the condition you were straight they didn't really like YOU. It's like dating someone for there money. As long as they have money you will love them but if they become broke you decide they aren't good enough.

A good thing to tell them is that you are the same person they have always known, they just now know something new about you. It was always there they just never knew about it.

Don't feel pressured into saying anything and don't rush into telling anyone. I have heard about how hard it is to be gay. You will get picked on by some people but in the end as long as you are happy with yourself what do their opinions matter?
When you come out be prepared for discrimination and all sorts Evils. You will come across homophobes, just be prepared.

Another thing is you are still very young and it could be a Phase. Wait until you are sure before you commit yourself to anything.

I wish you the best of luck and only wish I was there to help you through it.

[tommycg95]

I agree with Krafty: but also let them know that ur not interested in them b/c it might freak them out

[Nelson]

I had a big worry telling my closest male friend im bi (hes kinda homophobic), Anyway i just told him over msn, he was fine with it, although he still makes gay jokes, i dont mind, i was expecting to be killed by him but it all worked out

[Zazu]

Thread is a bit old, please try not to bump old threads dude.

:locked: