Why Cut...

[R_master]

hello everyone i am just wondering how you individuals feel the urge to cut yourselves, i understand alot of you have gone through a great deal of stress and depression, i to have been unhappy and feeling lonely many times but self mutilation just does not make much sense to me, i would appreciate some input and hope i havnt caused any hard feeling from this post because in my eyes it is just a bad way for expressing ones teen angst and want to know if "cutting" goes beyond the plateau of too much pressure and feeling relief that can be found in going for a walk or reading a book ect...

sincerly

-R_master

[grass]

thats exactly how i used 2 feel man and then i tried it and all my questions were answerd but im not suggesting u try it cos its not somethin u can just ignore

[R_master]

yeah im not planing to ever cut, at least on purpose :wink:

so what does it do for you? make you feel good, kind of relaxing? and do you ever worry about infections?

[DADA Witch]

Like it has been explained so much before, Cutting, I feel..is the only thing we have control in our lives. I don't know how to explain it... But, having the ability to finally control something in your life, when everything spins out of your grasp, just..feels..good, in a grim sort of way.

Cutting, is something I do alone, and it gives me time to think things through. I am NOT suggesting you ought to cut yourself to think things through, but merely stating what I do.

I do know..that cutting of course, is nor healthy, nor the brightest choice out there, but for some reason..it helps me. I am proud for not having gone in the directions of drugs, because..that will kill me quicker, then my cutting.

I do know I have a problem with it. But I have worked with it. My best mates, and I have cutted less this month, an achievement maybe not in your eyes, but ours.

I don't know if that answers your question..but it's all I can say to help you better understand what goes on in our lives..

[R_master]

thanks Witch that is the kind of answer that i was looking for , i just have one more question then im done bothering you guys. Do any of you plan to ever stop cutting in the future or is the idea not seem like an option or somthing you would want to do?

[Oath]

im sure as i get older i will stop cutting but its not as easy as it seems its just as addictive as smoking..or something like that
or i mite cut to far and get sent to a mental hospital until i get better...then i might stop cause those hopital couselers really get ya down....i actually cut my self in the hosital at rehab...cause it was so hard. i mite learn some sort of lesson if i end up goin back...

[DADA Witch]

I believe...I will stop cutting, eventually. And probably, in the future I will think of it childish, and stupid, but at the moment, it feels quite good to me. I know..how pathetic I must sound, explaining to you..why I cut, and my feeble reasons, but I really hope you don't judge us. Anyone for the matter..

I know I have a probably, and intend to work everything out soon.

[=

[Whisper]

"Escape from emptiness, depression, and feelings of unreality.
Easing tension.
Providing relief: when intense feelings build, self-injurers are overwhelmed and unable to cope. By causing pain, they reduce the level of emotional and physiological arousal to a bearable one.
Relieving anger: many self-injurers have enormous amounts of rage within. Afraid to express it outwardly, they injure themselves as a way of venting these feelings.
Escaping numbness: many of those who self-injure say they do it in order to feel something, to know that they're still alive.
Grounding in reality, as a way of dealing with feelings of depersonalization and dissociation
Maintaining a sense of security or feeling of uniqueness
Obtaining a feeling of euphoria
Preventing suicide


Expressing emotional pain they feel they cannot bear
Obtaining or maintaining influence over the behavior of others
Communicating to others the extent of their inner turmoil
Communicating a need for support
Expressing or repressing sexuality
Expressing or coping with feelings of alienation
Validating their emotional pain -- the wounds can serve as evidence that those feelings are real


Continuing abusive patterns: self-injurers tend to have been abused as children.
Punishing oneself for being "bad"
Obtaining biochemical relief: there is some thought that adults who were repeatedly traumatized as children have a hard time returning to a "normal" baseline level of arousal and are, in some sense, addicted to crisis behavior. Self-harm can perpetuate this kind of crisis state
Diverting attention (inner or outer) from issues that are too painful to examine
Exerting a sense of control over one's body
Preventing something worse from happening
These reasons can be broadly grouped into three categories:

Affect regulation -- Trying to bring the body back to equilibrium in the face of turbulent or unsettling feelings. This includes reconnection with the body after a dissociative episode, calming of the body in times of high emotional and physiological arousal, validating the inner pain with an outer expression, and avoiding suicide because of unbearable feelings. In many ways, as Sutton says, self-harm is a "gift of survival." It can be the most integrative and self-preserving choice from a very limited field of options.

Communication -- Some people use self-harm as a way to express things they cannot speak. When the communication is directed at others, the SIB is often seen as manipulative. However, manipulation is usually an indirect attempt to get a need met; if a person learns that direct requests will be listened to and addressed the need for indirect attempts to influence behavior decreases. Thus, understanding what an act of self-harm is trying to communicate can be crucial to dealing with it in an effective and constructive way.

Control/punishment -- This category includes trauma reenactment, bargaining and magical thinking (if I hurt myself, then the bad thing I am fearing will be prevented), protecting other people, and self-control. Self-control overlaps somewhat with affect regulation; in fact, most of the reasons for self-harm listed above have an element of affect control in them.

In an interesting theory that combines all three categories, Miller (1994) posits an explanation for why such a large majority of peep who self-harm are female. Women are not socialized to express violence externally and when confronted with the vast rage many self-injurers feel, women tend to vent on themselves. She quotes the feminist poet Adrienne Rich:

Alexithymia
Alexithymia is a fairly recent psychological construct describing the state of not being able to describe the emotions one is feeling. Alexithymia was positively linked to self-injurious behavior in a 1996 study (Zlotnick, et el.) and is congruent with how people who self-injure often describe the emotional state before an injury; they frequently cannot pinpoint any particular feeling that was present. This is especially important in understanding the communicative function of self-injury: "Rather than use words to express feelings, an alexithymic's communication is an act aimed at making others feel [those same feelings]" (Zlotnick et al., 1996).

Self-capacities and Invalidation
A constructivist theory of self-injurious behavior (Deiter, Nicholls, & Pearlman, 2000) holds that people who self-injure usually have not developed three important self-capacities: the ability to tolerate strong affect, the ability to maintain a sense of self-worth, and the ability to maintain a sense of connection to others. The first of these speaks directly to the affect-regulation role of self-harm; the others are perhaps related to its communicative functions.

Pearlman et al. (2000) note that "when children experience shaming and punitive rhetoric or physical blows rather than responsive words" they cannot internalize others are loving and cannot develop the capacity to maintain a sense of connection to others. They further state, "The ability to experience, tolerate, and integrate strong affect cannot develop fully when strong feelings are met with punishment or derision." Having a sense that some feelings are unacceptable and not allowed also impairs this ability. And the ability to maintain a sense of oneself as a person of worth cannot be developed when a child never feels she is good enough, when her "existence and accomplishments are met with silence or abusive words or actions."

~SecretShame~ (http://www.palace.net/llama/psych/injury.html)

[TehBovril]

I do it because i have Rage issues.Id rather hurt myselfthan someone else. Im trying to stop but its proving a rather difficulttask.

[ouch that hurts]

i wish my lawn cut itself as much as you guys do :\