Theory On A Curious Mate Of Mine...

[The Harlequin]

Okay ~ so one of my closest friends has reason to think I'm bisexual or gay, I was careless and let a big clue slip, but after I did he didn't (as I suspected) completely avoid talking to me or anything, we were on our own when this happened...

Anyway, he seemed more relieved than anything else, and I swear he at one point rubbed his foot against mine, and it was nice... I liked it a lot, even though it was subtle.

I remembered an incident last year where he had a few mates round his house and they j/o to porn in the same room, one of the guys let slip in school but I didn't care and stuck by him (before I knew I was bi)

Now I'm wondering what he actually thinks about my sexuality, whether he's also bi or curious or whether I'm just imagining things...

If he asked, I'd be happy to experiment with him, but I wouldn't instigate it, what should I do?

[teendude_1991]

Well, I wouldn't outright ask him if he rubbed my foot, because the subtlety was key in the first place. I would however, sit beside him and see if he makes any more movements like this. Chances are he might like you, or he might not. So you can either ask him outright, or try rubbing his foot with yours, subtly of course, and see where that gets you.

[Mr. Awesome]

If it were me i would not make a move. I would however make an opportunity for him to make some sort of move. If he rubbed your foot on purpose to get your attention before, then chances are that he will try something else, then you can respond if you so wish.

[rubidoux]

I kind of disagree with the previous two posts. When it comes to as sensitive a subject as sexuality, I think it's best to know where you stand. Some straight guys like to mess around because they think it's funny, but get freaked out if all of a sudden it goes too far because one person mistook joking around as making a move. If he's your friend and you want him to know about your sexuality, I think it's best to talk to him about it so you both know exactly how you feel. Then you can see what happens as far as anyone "making a move."

[Bougainvillea]

I agree with Rubi on this one.

[The Joker]

Rubi hammered it down.

[Atonement]

If he asked, I'd be happy to experiment with him, but I wouldn't instigate it, what should I do?

I'm quite sure that you answered your own question in a question. You don't instigate, but if it happens, you go along with it if you want to.

[Bougainvillea]

Oohh...
Good observation.
+Rep

[The Harlequin]

I'm quite sure that you answered your own question in a question. You don't instigate, but if it happens, you go along with it if you want to.

Well, that was what I was planning on doing, but I wantd another opinion, one which I got from Rubi, but I dunno if making it outright would also make it uncomfortable for him, maybe moreso than if it just sorta happened,

However I do really want as much of a wide arsenal of how to deal with this situation as possible,

[the_conquerer]

i think you should just be open with him and go for it if you feel strongly about it but don't push him into anything or you could screw up your friendship :D

[The Harlequin]

i think you should just be open with him and go for it if you feel strongly about it but don't push him into anything or you could screw up your friendship :D

But here's what I'm unsure of ~ is it unfair of me to come out to him? I mean I'd be landing him in one hell of a difficult situation, here's a friend of mine who is probably more homophobe than most of my closest friends...

I mean, I might just be underestimating him, but I don't want to take him out of his comfort zone by just saying "Oh btw, I'm bisexual!"

Is that twisted logic?
Or is it equally bad to slowly develop it ~ I'm just scared of losing him...
And I might, ya know? I wanna tell him, but if it's sudden all I can see is himgoing very quiet and becoming very cold.

But NOT telling him is eating away at me, because I can't keep secrets from my nearest and dearest ~ it kills me, and this is a big part of who I am...

I dunno...
I still really need help (X'^<

[the_conquerer]

God thats hard!! umm if hes not gonna go all weird over it then i still think you should tell him if u feel that stongly about it or pm me if u wanna chat on msn about it ;)