My Sexuality's Consiquence On Friends

[The Harlequin]

Okay, this could either go in Family and Friends or on here so I just posted it here. I was just writing on another thread when I suddenly realised just how much of a serious mess I'm in...

I'm in High School, and am not afraid to make enemies of the many two-faced arseholes/bullies who thrive in this environment... Until now I've used both words and force to ensure that I am not walked all over, and I have a select few, incredibly loyal friends who are very close to me...

But now that I know I'm bi, and that Year 11's have broken up for the summer holidays, I can sense there's going to be a problem.

I have been depressed and lonely all year, (next year I start Sixth Form) I have a massive crush on a guy I know and realising that, I began to know just how happy I'd be in a relationship with him. My long-standing depression had lifted once I accepted who I was. However ~ if I ask him out, whether the answer is yes or no, we are both VERY public figures, the secret would be well and truly out...

The bullies would now have a weapon to use against me, my close friends would also recieve more stick than ever for being associated with me, and there's no gaurentee that I'd be going out with this guy anyway...

Oh s**t...
I know you've heard it a thousand times before, but VT ~ if ever I needed your help so far it's now, PLEASE HELP ME!!!
(X^{

[Confused Bi]

Okay well let´s start from the beginning, if your friend were to say yes how do u know this would not be able to stay secret? Is your school very homophobic?

I think if those friends are as close to you as you say, they will stick with you and defend you no matter what. Don´t mind the bullies, if this can all be kept private like the way I do it in my school, no problem should be presented.

But you should first see what your friend would say and what he thinks about all this.

Goodluck:)

[byee]

Hmmm....

First, I'd be very sure your friend was Ok with all this and wants what you do.

Then, I'd foregt about the sexuality issue, you guys being a couple. Rather, look at it as a 'social' issue. You can be whatever you want on yuor own time, but in certain situations, you have to 'tailor' that for the public. My dad wears a business suit to work, but when he comes home, he gets into sweats. Same thing for you guys.

Being 'discrete' doesn't mean you're 'hiding' or 'shameful', it means you understand boiundaries. That there's a time and place for everything, and just b/c you 'play by the rules' doesn't make you a pussy. Au Contrare, it shows maturity and real wisdom.

Find out what his feelings are, then decide together how you want to discretely proceed. School is def a business suit environment, but what you 'wear' outside that place is up to you. Just keep it seperate.

[dstnyisurs]

It seems you're scared a lot about losing your security.
Coming out and being different takes guts, and as long as you are confident in who you are, you can pull it off. Sure, people may taunt you and you may not have the position you have now where you feel safe and secure, but you will be being yourself. If you can dare to be different and proud, then you will be a happier person because you'll be yourself.

[pkid]

Awww I'm also going to the same thing as you, I'm also popular with you know.. Anyways I would just keep hiding unless you love him a lot, I'm hiding because I'm wondering if it's just a long phase I'm going through and I hope it is...good luck for the both of us

[mr.sexy_bomb]

is it really that bad? , cause where i live beeing gay is a free pass to pupularity, everyone likes you and wants to hang out so i dont know what to say because is not like that in my hs, i think you should just be your self and i think you should only come out when you think its right and dont care what people say, do you really wanna not be happy because of some jerks or would u rather be someone who might be hated but is also loved and that matter the most, that you are who you are, and if your friends are really your friends then they wont care about your sexuality

[The Harlequin]

Okay, update!

I told my family (except my brother ~ the arse) and I've also told my make-shift little brother who was completely okay with it, and I think my other slightly more homophobic friend either has an idea or knows (it all happened by accident, it's a long story, basicall he saw the e-mail prompts I get from VT entitled "My Sexuality's Consiquence On Friends" and "Finally I've discovered my sexuality" so yeah, I think he knows and appears to be cool with it...

My little brother, though, has semi-dropped me in it ~ he thought I'd told my tomboy friend at my drama group and now she and a far more nosy case (also a girl) only know that something is up, they don' know what...

If I told them I would be out of the closet bisexual by the end of the day, for some reason though I'm holding back ~ I think my slight homophobe friend knows but I haven't said to him black or white "I'm bi"... If he wanted to he could still dismiss it as me just advising people...

If he supported me, then I really couldn't care less ~ bring on the battle, but if he 'ent okay with it... I dunno, I mean, he's still my mate, I go to sleepovers at his house a lot, what if he distances himself from me...?

Ughhh...
I suppose I shouldn't care, but we've known each other for years now. I just ~ I think I need to tell him outright, but how? Online? What if his reaction online isn't actually what he really thinks?

I dunno *is messed up* I really need some advice (:^<