BestFriend help

[eVoLvEd247]

my best friend of 4 years has fallen into a trail of deep depression. he barely talks around his girlfriend and he rarely shows any signs of happiness around me or any1 anymore. no ambition to be happy, and all because his girlfriend dad doesnt really like him. not because hes dating her, but because of his attitude and fragilness around her. today he yelled at me 4 wanting to come with them somewhere. he almost swung at me too. dropping a 100 f bombs he yelled at me cause i said he is depressed.cont. soon

[eVoLvEd247]

continued. i said he was depressed and i couldn't do anything about it. thats what upset me and i need some advice on how to deal with it plz. the same happened b4 with me and he helped me through it. now i need to return the favor.

[LiGHT]

First just edit your first thread.
And how old are you both?
Try talking to him again and if he flips out for sure talk to an adult or someone that you are really close to. HE may not want your help but it seems to me that he really needs it.

[Blue63]

Well first of all, don't call him depressed in anger, that will only get anger him more.

I would talk to his girlfried, if you can't convince him he needs help, maybe she can. If he keeps flipping out like this and shows next to no emotion, and very little interest in things once enjoyed, he's probably depressed. If you, or none of your friends can convince him to talk to someone. Talk to his parents, maybe they've noticed it, and if anyone can get them help it's them.

If you don't want to talk to him right away, try and get him involved in something. Get him out, take him to a party with his girlfriend. Really try and get him to just have some fun, it might just be a phase he's in. Try and brighten his spirits. Getting angry at him will not help.

If you do confront him about the situation, you want to do it where he knows you care, because when he sees people who care about him are worried about him, that may be the motivation he needs to get help.

[The Harlequin]

If you don't want to talk to him right away, try and get him involved in something. Get him out, take him to a party with his girlfriend. Really try and get him to just have some fun, it might just be a phase he's in. Try and brighten his spirits.

If your friend is as volitile as you say, you want to be wary of trying to make him do anything, i you start suggesting getting out and put the slightest amount of pressure on him he might just explode again, and then there's less chance he'll listen to you,

Largely I agree with Blue, but this is something that (if you are going to try) you're going to have to be exceedngly careful with, I'd take the other aspects of Blue's advice and use this as a last resort.

Also, tread carefully with the whole parent thing, if he finds out you went to talk to them then he might see it as 'behind his back' and a bit like betrayal, which would only make his depression worse...

Just be careful mate, it's good that you want to help your mate out, but you don't want the irony of losing him whilst trying to help him,

[byee]

Some good advice here. I think the idea of 'giving back' to him now that you've determined that he needs it is *nice* but flawed. He's not asking for your help, eventhough you might accurately believe he needs it.

I think you have a couple of options here. First, if you're seriously worried about him, if you think there's potential for self destructive behavior, then regardless of the consequences to your friendship you have an obligation to tell your parents or his.

If it's not that serious, I think all you can do is describe the change you see in him, and let him know of your concerns in an objective, non accusatory way. It's then up to him to respond, and it's then up to you to decide if you want to be around him.

People make bad chocies, and when they're your friends it's particularly hard, you want to protect them. But, that only works when they want your help, which doesnlt seem to be the case here, so all you can do is really let them know your thoughts and then leave it at that.

[Ruby]

continued. i said he was depressed and i couldn't do anything about it. thats what upset me and i need some advice on how to deal with it plz. the same happened b4 with me and he helped me through it. now i need to return the favor.

Depression is personal and senstive issue you need to support your friend

with no judgement . Incourage him to see someone perhaps GP but

dont judge him that is key . Maybe you could get some pamplets from

Medical centre and leave them in his bag or his place . Tell him

you care for him and just concern about him and see what happens.

Plan (B)
Is to speak to professional about this as lam not !

l wish you good luck with this just be patient

From Ruby