And Now I Feel Like An Arse...

[The Harlequin]

So before I became comfortable with my orientation, I used to be very homophobic, I used to act homophobic and always treat people who were that way inclined with an arms-length approach. I mean I didn't used to ignore them, just have a guard up and be on edge because... I guess if I showed that I was actually okay with it, my mates might think I was like that too... Now that I AM bi, I feel like a total arse for how I used to behave.

I was just wondering, does anyone have any regrets like me... I just feel so bad for bein like that before, and I just worry now how much damage an influential character in school can have on people, as I am quite influential...

Ugh, somebody help here, I feel really guilty...
(:^{

[HelloWorld123456]

well it is always a bad thing to treat ppl that way but ... it is something you have done now just ddont act like that anymore ... you have identified you have done bad ... and you feel sorry thats a great thing ... well atleast you didnt offend them or somerthing ...


well i kinda of feel grossed out (i dont mean to hurt anybody) when a homosexual person comes near to me but i try to treat them like i treat my hetro friends ... (I am str8 btw) ... And i guess our orientation play an important role in our behaviour ...

[Zazu]

It was bad that you were homophobic in the past, but there's not much you can do about it now, don't worry.

You've come to terms with your own sexuality, and you realise that it's bad to be homophobic, so imo there's nothing much to worry about now.

[byee]

Use your guilt to change your behavior and attitudes towards others. Recognize that being 'different' isn't such a bad thing, and practice tolerance in all it's forms.

[sebbie]

People can change over time, who cares if you were homophobic in the past its how you act now that defines you.

Don't forget how you used to act instead remember it so when you are thinking you will realise that you have matured as a person and changed for the better.

[scuba steve]

it's good that you where able to get over this and everyone can learn from your mistakes

personally i am slightly homophobic in the sense that i would feel weird around them.

[The Harlequin]

I mean a big part of me is glad that I'm not like that anymore, so I can feel more at ease with myself, but there's a mate of mine whose quite homophobic, moreso than I ever was, but the last time I was round his house John Barrowman was on TV and he said: "That dude would be a legend if he wasn't bi." and then I said: "Being gay/bi doesn't make someone less or more of a person, it's just who he is, mate."

He didn't say anything after that, I think I made him feel guilty for saying it but i felt like I' done the right thing. Anybody who knows me knows I have a hideously loud conscience, but I'm wondering whether me saying that has made him question my sexuality...

I don't fancy him, not in the damn slightest, but there's no way of convincing him for sure. He's like my twin brother... This all happened before I knew I was bi, what's gonna happen when I return from the UK knowing who I am? I SO don't want him to know because I think he'd feel really uncomfortable but at the same time - wht if he asks me? I can't lie, he's my surrogate-brother!

I don't know how I can tell either of my most loyal mates, I'm a reasonably public figure, what if they feel as though they've tied themselves to a sinking boat? My other mate Nathan is like my little bro, what kinda stick is he gonna get? Granted, I'll be in Sixth Form (a sort of college but in school grounds, so removed from other years) but is that gonna be enough of a distance for people to not associate him with me, and therefore the freak...? (X^<

Anyboy who thinks sexuality is a CHOICE needs a damn good hiding!

[Raize]

Don't worry about that. That's the same way for me. I'd mindlessly follow what my parents said, then I realized I was attracted to girls and realized they were wrong.

People change and mature over time, and others should realize that. If they don't realize that then they aren't worth being around. Besides, most homophobes normally turn out gay or curious anyway :B

I'd go out and tell him you're bi and just forget about your past.

[scuba steve]

I mean a big part of me is glad that I'm not like that anymore, so I can feel more at ease with myself, but there's a mate of mine whose quite homophobic, moreso than I ever was, but the last time I was round his house John Barrowman was on TV and he said: "That dude would be a legend if he wasn't bi." and then I said: "Being gay/bi doesn't make someone less or more of a person, it's just who he is, mate."

He didn't say anything after that, I think I made him feel guilty for saying it but i felt like I' done the right thing. Anybody who knows me knows I have a hideously loud conscience, but I'm wondering whether me saying that has made him question my sexuality...

I don't fancy him, not in the damn slightest, but there's no way of convincing him for sure. He's like my twin brother... This all happened before I knew I was bi, what's gonna happen when I return from the UK knowing who I am? I SO don't want him to know because I think he'd feel really uncomfortable but at the same time - wht if he asks me? I can't lie, he's my surrogate-brother!

I don't know how I can tell either of my most loyal mates, I'm a reasonably public figure, what if they feel as though they've tied themselves to a sinking boat? My other mate Nathan is like my little bro, what kinda stick is he gonna get? Granted, I'll be in Sixth Form (a sort of college but in school grounds, so removed from other years) but is that gonna be enough of a distance for people to not associate him with me, and therefore the freak...? (X^<

Anyboy who thinks sexuality is a CHOICE needs a damn good hiding!

i wouldn't worry too much though about being round school there are loads o 6th formers in my school that have come out about there sexuality no one says anything and do nothing but respect their decision

[punkjake]

I do I'm a str8 but i used to make funn of them but i know thats wrong now,and don't give into pier pressure

[YourFriend]

hehe, i am gay and i pretend to be homophobic bcs all my friends act such, so i must fit in

[The Harlequin]

hehe, i am gay and i pretend to be homophobic bcs all my friends act such, so i must fit in

To be honest, at 13 I think that's okay. I know that sounds hypocrytical but what I mean is at least when you're in 6th Form you don't really have any years who are older than you that can give you grief. If you're 13 there are still quite a few year groups who can and will try to intimidate you...

So as bad as this sounds pretending to be homophobic in your circumstances is probably not as bad as ME being a homophobe right the way through this year... It's just ironic, ya know?

God clearly has a sense of humour (:^,

[hhhhssssuuuuhhhh]

it's common to suppress how you feel when you have people close to you going against those feelings in others.