Pleasee helpppp!!!!!!

[just-another-guy]

ok so i have a problem i think i cheated on my gf i feel so guilt stricken but idk if i cheated on her so what happened is that i have a friend who is a girl and i talk to her a lot im very close with her and we tell each other everything and i was talking to her and helping her with this guy one day and somehow we got onto the topic of masturbating and she said she does it and i did to but i stopped talking about that. another night we were talking and i got horny and she did too but we dident have like txt sex or anything like that like it was not on purpose but i think we were both horny and like this has happened a lot since then but i never thought i was doing anything wrong. but the other day i was in the car with my gf and her mom and her mom was like if u ever cheat on my daughter i will be veryy mad at you and stuff like that. i got scared and now i feel like i did but i love my gf with all my heart and i never want to lose her i cant tell her about this because i don't want her mom to find out about it and then all hell break loose can someone pleas tell me i dident cheat on her pleassss

pleas help me i dont know what to do pleassssss!!!

Please do not bump threads after only 10 minutes. It takes some times for users to reply. Thanks.
~Nick [Oblivion]

[dstnyisurs]

Well, you didn't cheat.
Simply don't talk with this girl about masturbation and stay clear of her next time you're horny. As long as you didnt cheat...

[just-another-guy]

yah i told her about it and i dont talk to her about it any more i mean we never did anything at all on purpise and i would never ever cheat on my gf with someone and thanks for the help

[IAMWILL]

This is a though one. Well cheating isn't only physical. You're really really pushing it here.

Just.... you can't talk to friends about this if you have a girlfriend.... I mean its not extremely bad or anything, and you really should be able to talk to your best friend about anything, but this is.... a different category shall we say. Talking about physical stuff with someone thats not your girlfriend is kind of... well really pushing it.

This is hard to decipher, but the bottom line is, just don't do it again. Just don't get into conversations with your friend about this, unless you absolutely need to, and if you get into one, either change the subject or say "I don't really feel like talking about this".

[just-another-guy]

thanks and it was my best friend who this happend with my friend who i have known for years and yearss and we never did any of it on purpose it was her helping me with some physical problems i was having with my girlfriend at the time and we dont do it anymore we have stopped talking about it or anything like it

[rubidoux]

When it comes to cheating, go with your instinct. If what you're doing feels wrong, it probably is. And if you want to stay with your girlfriend, you should probably stop hanging out with this other girl if the sexual tension is that strong.

[Oblivion]

You were just talking about your masturbation life with a friend; it's not like you had phone sex. Just talking about something sexual with someone else other than your girlfriend does not make it cheating at all in my opinion. It doesn't mean she wouldn't like it though; so maybe you should talk to her about it. She probably won't bite your head off, since you didn't do anything, and your being honest. But definitely if you think it might go too far in the future, I'd be careful. Maybe try not to stray towards that subject again.

[byee]

I think it's important to understand 'Why' or did what you did to determine what 'cheating' really means. If you did it with the intent of leading someone on for your own purposes, if you were looking for gratification outside your primary relationship, then it's cheating (regardless if you had sex or not). I';s about the reason, it's about why you're doing it, and it's about where it's coming from in you. And, of course, it's about what you and your g/f have agreed to.

That said, people can talk with others about a range of subjects, including sexual ones (and even get aroused by it) and still not be 'cheating'. That's b/c the purpose of the convo isn't to meet some needs that should rightly be met within the primary relationship. Cheating first and foremost indicates that you've strayed, that you're meeting needs (be they emotional or sexual) outside your primary relationship, and without your g/f's consent.

So, in your case, it doesn't sound as if you've crossed that line, that your convo was about something sexual, you both enjoyed it, but it doesn't reflect anything more than the excitement of talking about masturbation with someone else. There's no emotional meaning to it, it doesn't come from some problem with your g/f, and your not doing it b/c you're looking for *something else*.

It might be wisest, though, now that you and your other friend have talked about masturbation for a while now to maybe leave it alone. There's a point (as Will mentions) when the topic begins to look a little less like two friends just talking and sharing and more like 2 people getting eachother off.

[DJthekid]

ok you didn't cheat but i'd still not tell her about it

[Gumleaf]

ok you didn't cheat but i'd still not tell her about it

well since this thread is from june, you would hope he has figured things out by now. please don't post in old threads ok.

locked.