Age is just a number...right?

[Jimi21]

Is it wrong for a 17 year old to date a 28 year old? Any thoughts?


Jove,
Limi

[HelloWorld123456]

age is just a number :D ... if youre happy dating her no probs man .. it is you who has to be happy no-one else :D ...

[Reality]

Is "age just a number" when you see 35 year olds having relationships with 12 year olds, or perving on 8 year olds? No.

When you "age", you become more mature, and you tend to have more in common with those around your own age group. There's nothing wrong (in my opinion) with a 30 year old dating a 45 year old, but it varies on the situation. Adult + Adult, is different to Child + Adult or Teenager + Adult, IMO.

But as for a 17 year old dating a 28 year old, to be honest with you, it is really odd. Not on the 17 year olds' behalf, but rather then 28 year olds' behalf. I certainly wouldn't want to date someone that's a teenager and nearly 10 years younger than me when I'm 28.

Whatever, though.

[Oblivion]

In this particular case, it's legal, since you are above 16, the age of consent in Iowa.
As for whether it's "OK" or not, I'd say sure. If you both are good with it, why not?
Age is actually just a number sometimes, unless it's illegal. :P.

[Ripplemagne]

Age can be just a number, but rarely is. The only people who recite that quote are those who are too young or too old to do something, so that speaks wonders.

[Raize]

No, it isn't a number. You're mind and body changes with age. You change over time. It's not just a number.

And a 17 year old should not date a 28 year old. That's too much of a gap.

[LoveBullets]

No, it isn't. Th level of maturity a person has does indeed have ALOT to do with age. Teens often say that they are "mature for their age," but that's just part of the personal fable that occurs during adolescence.

When it comes to dating odds are it won't work out if the age difference is above half your current age. Different ages have different thoughts and feeling about things, not to mention that interests and friend groups also vary greatly. If you want to date someone older go ahead, but don't be surprised if it doesn't work out.

[INFERNO]

There are various ways of categorizing age, from the simple chronological age to psychological age to social age, etc... . So age is not simply a number. Chronological age would be a number but that number has a certain relevance within the law, morals and ethics for everyone.

As for it being "wrong", there are different ways to answer this. Legally, it depends on where you live. Morally and ethically, it would depend on just what the relationship is and how close you and the older person are to each other.

But to put it simply, those who claim age is just a number are using a narrow-minded view as to just what aging is. Yes it can be a number but that number does not describe what the person is. For example, an 85-year old may be considered old, senile, etc... . In reality, they could still be jogging and doing coursework. Age does not describe a person fully and that number has a special meaning.

[The Batman]

Rotw :arrow: R&D

[punkjake]

as long as she isn't just tring to get ur seed XD

[Jimi21]

lol First of all im gay....but i see all of your points...

[tunacake]

if you two can love eachother then you should. love is precious :)

[Ripplemagne]

Which is, precisely, why I'm going to marry my frog, Stimpy. <3

[dwindala]

No, it isn't a number. You're mind and body changes with age. You change over time. It's not just a number.

And a 17 year old should not date a 28 year old. That's too much of a gap.

I agree and I will take that to another level. Since you are only 17 and this other person is 28 they are not only older physically but also mentally. Which is very important. They have 28 years of experience in all sorts of things you haven't even thought of. They have the mentality of an 28 year old and you of a 17 year old. Thats a big difference. I'm not saying that people should not date others 11yrs older but just not at 17. There is too much of a Mental Gap. They have to much of an advantage. They already now how you think, they've been there. Almost twice! BAD IDEA IMO!

Plus, have you thought, why would they want to date a 17 Year old? Why cant they find(Or don't want) someone around their age? Think about it.

[punkjake]

lol First of all im gay....but i see all of your points...
oh...awkward O_o as long as they actually love you and not useing you as a sex toy

[Project Delta]

My friends parents are 44 (mum) and 84 (dad) so if you think that 11 years is a big gap... lol your mistaken

[rubidoux]

The whole "age is just a number" phrase is kind of relative, because it depends not only on the years difference, but also on the specific ages of the people in question. a 17-year-old and a 28-year-old have completely different life goals and thought processes, so I really don't see how that could possibly work. Relationships like that are generally just the 17-year-old being used for sex, honestly.

[emmalovesgs]

tbh i think its more then just a number but i think this gap is slightly too bigg "/

[Θάνατος]

Age is not a number. With age comes maturity and personal experiences.

There should be no reason a 17 year old guy should be dating a 28 year old girl.

I also would say the same thing if the girl was 17 and the guy was 28.

11 years is a pretty big age gap and a lot of life experiences need to be considered here.

If you were to have sex, it would be considered statutory rape in the US, a 17 year old is not an adult and a 28 year old is an adult.

What could you two have in common once the sex and newness of sex runs out.

[uihwljtkegr]

Age may or may not be "just a number" - it all depends on the context in which we are talking about it and the individual situation. This is one of those topics which can be, in some cases, rather controversial. It depends on the people involved, and it would seem that everyone has a different view on it. Some people do view it as just a number; As one gets older it seems to become the case more so than before, and the line "begins to blur" or so it would seem.

I personally wouldn't be interested in a relationship with such a large age gap, and personally wouldn't go more than 2 years either way, and thats if I'm really pushing it. If I'm being brutally honest I would feel uncomfortable with an age difference of that, at this current point in time, due to the vastly different levels of maturity that we encounter at this stage in our lives. Of course this is just my oppinion, and I'm not going to tell you what you can and can't do.

[Cromm]

Age measured linearly as a function of solar and lunar cycles, is indeed "just a number". Just as 18 is "just a number". Which is why you can have some messed up laws in certain states, that would punish the older of a 17+19 y/o couple with the same vigour as a 35y/o that entices a meeting with a 14y/o over the internet; or a 17y/o sending a half nude picture of herself to her 17y/o boyfriend punished the same as a 40y/o trafficing kiddie porn. Numbers can create some messed up dynamics, especially where law is concerned.

But we don't age in a linear scale, so differences in years are not perportional to differences in maturity. Morally, it isn't the numbers that are important, but what they represent: maturity, experience, emotional stablity (theoretically at least). As such, a 45 y/o could be on the same playing field, so to speak, as a 60y/o. The same could not be said of a 12 and 16 y/o: even though the difference in linear age is less, the difference in maturity is much, much greater.


Here's bottom line though, putting all the crap aside, and being completely honest with yourself; with you a teenager, and he an adult pushing 30, do you really see yourselfs as being on equal ground? If you do, AND if you're right, then morally, it's okay. If not, then it's just wrong.

[Ripplemagne]

Actually, a couple of seventeen and nineteen is generally alright. If it's within two years, it's legal in most places.

[sydney90]

Well I started going out with my bf at 17 and he was nearly 25 and that was big age gap from peopes reactions......we have been togetehr for 4 years now and getting engaged! I think 17 and 28 is maybe too much!

[iamafterhours]

Meh.. I'm dating a 28 year old guy and he sometimes acts 12 :P


Seriously though, it depends on the relationship. My big worry would be that you'd have nothing in common and he'd be expecting more from you physically. But if you've gotten past that stuff then hell, go for it. Just be careful!

[kyle95]

if she's 28 mate, she likes younger blokes. perhaps ur not a threat 2 her as much as an older bloke. u did say "date", it's not as if ur getting married. don't 4get that she's expecting u 2 b slightly more mature than other teens. go 4 it, there's no harm mate

[tyler27846]

age is just a number i would date someone 10 years older

[YourFriend]

Yes, in this case i think age is just a number.

[Hyper]

Age can be just a number, but rarely is. The only people who recite that quote are those who are too young or too old to do something, so that speaks wonders.

I'd rep you for that if I could :D

100% Agree

[Ripplemagne]

The sentiment is still the same. :P

[Atropos]

Be happy with who ever you fall in love with :)
I like dating older people anyway.

[BlackenedSilver]

I maintain that age is just a number as long as it is adult to adult. (Adult to a teenager over 16) I don't think this same rule should be appiled for example a 16 yearold and a 10 year old etc. But as long as they are both over the legal age then Yea.. I dont think thats too bad. But then I dont mind if theres not too big a gap between them and 1 is under 16. Eg: 17 and 15
(If that makes any sense)