Advice on Getting a Boyfriend.... please?

[bri-]

well, i'm 16 years old and can't get a boyfriend. i'm really shy when it comes to talking to guys but i really want a boyfriend. advice or help please?

[NightFighter]

Heres a tip - dont go looking specifically for a boyfriend.
That way you dont seem desperate or like a silly girl who flirts with anyone which is probably very offputting to guys.
Dont take too much interest in a guy, make him work for a friendship. That way theyll be more appreciative of the friendship and will respect you more. After awhile you will become better friends so it may lead onto something more in time.
Having a boyfriend is not as fantastic as it may seem. Believe me.
Hope i helped. Im not sure if i was all that helpful, cant think of anything else to say though...

[bri-]

didn't really help... the enitre situation is too long for me to type so i probably f-ed up this thread anyways.... i can't talk to guys whatsoever. and no guys talk to me. all my guy friends are either taken or gay. =[ i just don't know what to do or how to go about getting into a relationship

[NightFighter]

ok il try again :)

Have you got a job? If you dont then you could get a job where you know some guys work. That way they would have to talk to you about the work. Itl be a good way to meet them. You say you have guy friends who are taken right. Well maybe you could ask them to introduce you to some of their mates. Go out with your guy friends, their girlfriends and their guy friends to the cinema or bowling or somewhere like that.

Im sorry if thats not helped again :( Im all out of ideas...

[bri-]

ah, don't worry about it... it's not your fault. and no, i don't have a job. and i've tried asking my guy friends to help me out.. but they don't want to be held responisble if one of their mates turns me down... i really don't get it... like, i've even asked some of my closer girlfriends to ask their guys to help but like i said, they don't want to be the one getting blames for my heart break.... =s

[NightFighter]

daamn :( Im sorry. Thats kinda a lame reason not to help you out.
Well, you could try the job thing out?

[bri-]

well, i've applied at over 15 different places but i live in a semi small town and noones really hiring.. =/

[NightFighter]

ohhhh..... em.... i dont know how to solve your problem. :(

Good luck anyway

[bri-]

like i said, it doesn't really matter. i've basically come to accept the fact that thers a 99.9% chance i won't ever have a boyfriend, i just thought i'd post this seeing if anyone had any ideas

[NightFighter]

Dont be silly! There a guy out there for you. Theres someone for everyone. Just have faith, there will be a guy but you just havent found him yet. It takes time.
Just because you dont have anyone right now doesnt mean you never will!

[TigerLily]

like i said, it doesn't really matter. i've basically come to accept the fact that thers a 99.9% chance i won't ever have a boyfriend, i just thought i'd post this seeing if anyone had any ideas

Don't say that!!!!
You're only young, from what I hear it seems as though you've just been unlucky in love so far, but that doesn't mean it will always be that way!
In the meanwhile, just keep reminding yourself of all the positive qualities in yourself that you possess, and try not to let your self-esteem be affected too much. In time you will find somebody, but until then just have fun and be happy, and I'm sure love will come when you least expect it :)

[bri-]

well, i've tried being postiive and not worrying about having a boyfriend, but my ex keeps textnig me telling me i'll never get a boyfriend, no body loves me and i should just go kill myself. he was my first and only boyfriend and i really loved him, we broke up becuase he couldn't get weed any more and apparently he was high everytime we were together...so, love just isn't going to happen for me and i accept that to an extent.

[NightFighter]

Dont even say that!
NO ONE should just go kill themselves!
He sounds like a douche bag anyway, think of it as a lucky escape. I would rather be alone than be with a dick like that. You could report him to the police maybe if hes really bothering you or i think theres some way where you can block them from texting you, so you dont actually recieve the texts. You shouldnt let him get away with that. Hes knocking your confidence right down which is really unfair. You WILL find love some day. You will. People do love you! everyone in the world has someone who loves them!
Try not to think about love too much. Itll come when its meant to.

[bri-]

i can't tell anyone on him. he's threatened me that if i tell on him, he knows some people in the local gangs around here that would be happy to hurt me.... =[ and i do want to kill myself and it's not 100% from him... it's just the fact that guys give me mixed singals and i alway take them the wrong way... and when i did ask a guy out that i really liked.. he laughed in my face. i have zero confidence and self esteem and i know that's not helping the situation.

[TigerLily]

Dont even say that!
NO ONE should just go kill themselves!
He sounds like a douche bag anyway, think of it as a lucky escape. I would rather be alone than be with a dick like that. You could report him to the police maybe if hes really bothering you or i think theres some way where you can block them from texting you, so you dont actually recieve the texts. You shouldnt let him get away with that. Hes knocking your confidence right down which is really unfair. You WILL find love some day. You will. People do love you! everyone in the world has someone who loves them!
Try not to think about love too much. Itll come when its meant to.

Exactly.
It sounds like this guy is the one missing out here, and guess what, he doesn't deserve you anyway!!
Try not to let him get you down. "No one has the right to make you feel inferior".
Love will find you, just give it time :)
And the next time will be better, I'm sure :)
But for now, just enjoy life and try to forget about love: concentrate on friends, hobbies, having fun, etc... it will come eventually :)

[bri-]

it's hard to enjoy life being bipolar with an ex boyfriend that won't stop bringing your confidence and self esteem down. i mean, when i started dating him none of my friends really knew anything about him, like he's not very popular at school, he does drugs to the extreme and etc. but now that we broke up and i want nothing to do with him it seems like he's friends with everyone i talk to and i can't get away from him. and whenever he's around me and my friends he uses that time to bring myself esteem down even more... so, i don't know which friends i can trust anymore...

[TigerLily]

I'm so sorry to hear that :(
All I can offer you is the thought of hope, hope for a better tomorrow... hope for a better guy who will love you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated.
VT is a very supportive place, there are so many people here to lend an ear if ever you feel like talking :)
:hug:

[NightFighter]

Omg, what a friggin bastard!

Get a new sim card. He'll be texting and wasting his money because it wont even be your number anymore.
I think you need professional help if you truly want to kill yourself!
Some people get more confident as they grow older if not then you can go to lessons to improve your confidence.
Im really sorry but im exhausted (its 2.30am here) so im gonna go to bed.
I really hope things get better for you. Sorry i didnt really help :(

Take Care

[bri-]

i'm beyond hope, sorry. my friends have all tired the same thing. and NightFinder, i do have professional help. i'm on several medications to prevent myself from killing myself. well, not really "prevent" but it keeps the suicidal thought to a minimum.. i just want to be loved and cared for again. When i was with my ex you couldn't of even known he was on drugs he treated me so good and i miss it. i miss him holding me and kissing me and everything... an being rejected constantly doesn't help either. so, please anyone with any form of helpful advice i'm willing to listen