is it okay to have oral or sex at thirteen

[cruza]

my gf is comeing over on the weekend and i wanted to no.
because she asked me if i wanted to have oral or even sex with her.
should i or shouldn't i?

[NeverTooLate]

maybe hold off on it, but its ur choice

[guy16]

if you both feel comfortable doing it then i say go for it, but remember that engaging in sexual stuff can make or break a relationship.

good luck!

[pontiacdriver]

my gf is comeing over on the weekend and i wanted to no.
because she asked me if i wanted to have oral or even sex with her.
should i or shouldn't i?

Well, the reality is that no one here can answer your question with certainty as we don't know the kind of moral upbringing you have, what kind of culture in which you live, and how your family and the girl's family would feel about your both having sex. The answer to your question is totally subjective, and my answer is look at your issue from a financial and a healthcare standpoint.

As a result of thumb, if you cannot get access to condoms, lube, birth control (for girls), or healthcare if there is a problem on your own, then you are way too young to be having sex.

Secondly, keep in mind that your parents are totally responsible for you until you turn 18 (or whatever the age of majority is in your country). It is really not fair to them that you have sex especially if things go badly and you end up with some sort of problem even as bad as pregnancy. It is one thing if you are 18+ as one is old enough to make decisions and be held accountable for them; it is hard to argue that for minors in most cases. There are a handful of folks who started having sex around here at your age, and I think a good number of them said that they had wished they had held off for a little while longer. Sex is just not physical sensations, and there is a huge emotional part to it. If you are ready to deal with all the emotions that come along with sex, then there is a chance you could be ready.

Thirdly, you always need to remember that your parents or her parents can probably find out if you two are having sex. You need to plan for how to handle your respective parents especially if they would be upset if you are having sex at 13. Basically, if your parents would have an issue with your having sex at your age, then you are probably better off waiting until you are older and are financially independent to make decisions about sex.

Fourthly, do you and your girlfriend know how to use birth control devices? What I mean is do you know where to find condoms and how to put one on? If the answer is not, then having sex is a bad idea. Without understanding your birth control and STD protection options in full, then having sex is risky.

Finally, if you do have sex, then make sure you know where to get access to emergency contraception, that your girlfriend knows what to do if she misses her period, that both of you have access to a healthcare provider in the event that either of you develop odd lumps or bumps or any other sexually related problems. Sex doesn't equate that you will have problems, but the reality is that problems can happen which is why many folks wait until they are older to have sex when they have access to their own doctor. I am sure it would be really hard for either you or your girlfriend to explain to your parents why either of you would need to see the doctor if either of you had a sexual issue. Remember, sexual issues are not just STDs as girls, especially if they are virgins, could have a lot of pain down there the first time, and irregular periods are always an issue for younger girls.

P.S. While the danger of pregnancy for oral sex is nil the reality is there are still risks with that type of sex, too. STDs can be spread through oral sex just as easily as vaginal and anal sex. If you both are virgins, then you both will be all right. However, as you get older always have yourself and your partners tested for STDs. Also, as with vaginal and anal sex there is still emotions involved with oral sex, and make sure you are prepared to handle your feelings as well as the emotions of your partner. Keep in mind that men and women view sex differently, and you need to understand the feminine view on sex in order for you to be ready.

[L]

im pretty sure the one above me nails it, and usually i would say "go for it!" but i've heard so many people say thay wish they had waited. i can't explain their reasons because i don't understand them myself, but only do it if your willing to risk regretting it later.

[Paladino]

if you both want to, then whats stopping you ?

[doghnut man7]

Whats the point of having sex a 13 with someone you may not even live with for the rest of your life they say having sex is supposed to be a special time so why do you want to lose your virginity so someone who may or may not have already lost theirs to someone else so whats the point I mean you cant wait 7 or 8 yrs. for the person your going to mary so you can lose it to your wife OR go on and lose it to your gf who if you break will go around tell everybody oh dont do it with him he doesnt even know how to do it right

[Donkey]

How old are you?

EDIT: Just saw the title. Will reply later, don't have time right now

[Triceratops]

Technically, no.

You have to be at least 16 to have sex, well in the UK anyways.
Besides, 13 is WAY too young. You're not physically or emotionally mature enough for that yet.

[Astrayed]

Right this is a nice and simple one: Your age does not matter aslong as you know what your doing and if you OK with it, If you are comfortable with it then your be fine, But! When you see her don't plan it, Let it just happen, It's the best way for it plus a bit more romantic if it's spontanious :) All I can say is you can say NO if you want but I think it will end up happening, Don't get worked up or nervous and do what you want man, Aslong as your both happy with it then why not? If you do then good luck to you :) Oh... And enjoy :)

[Leprachaun]

Personally I think that 13 is too young and I especially don't think you should have sex without protection.

[Silent]

Technically, no.

You have to be at least 16 to have sex, well in the UK anyways.
Besides, 13 is WAY too young. You're not physically or emotionally mature enough for that yet.

100 % Agreed

[nick]

13 is a bit young, but its really your decision and I thinkyou have to ask yourself whether you feel ready for this.

To be honest I certainly see no harm in a bj, if you go beyond that you must use a condom, dont even think of going without.

[NeoKitai]

In Canada, the age of consent is 16, however, it is legal to have sex from the age of 12 (counted by the younger partner). If the younger partner is 12 or 13, the older partner must not be 2 years older. If the younger partner is 14 or 15, then the older partner must not be 5 years older. If the younger partner is 16, then it is legal.

[The Batman]

If you have to ask if it's ok then clearly it's not. If your not entirely sure that your ready for it then hold off on it. Let your love grow more emotionally before it develops physically.

[NeoKitai]

Usually, it has to be fair and legal as well. Tell me your country, I've a book here about ages of consent.

[Oblivion]

Well, the reality is that no one here can answer your question with certainty as we don't know the kind of moral upbringing you have, what kind of culture in which you live, and how your family and the girl's family woul feel about your both having sex.

As a result of thumb, if you cannot get access to condoms, lube, birth control (for girls), or healthcare if there is a problem on your own, then you are way too young to be having sex.

Secondly, keep in mind that your parents are totally responsible for you until you turn 18 (or whatever the age of majority is in your country). It is really not fair to them that you have sex especially if things go badly and you end up with some sort of problem even as bad as pregnancy. It is one thing if you are 18+ as one is old enough to make decisions and be held accountable for them; it is hard to argue that for minors in most cases. There are a handful of folks who started having sex around here at your age, and I think a good number of them said that they had wished they had held off for a little while longer.

Thirdly, you always need to remember that your parents or her parents can probably find out if you two are having sex. You need to plan for how to handle your respective parents especially if they would be upset if you are having sex at 13. Basically, if your parents would have an issue with your having sex at your age, then you are probably better off waiting until you are older and are financially independent to make decisions about sex.

Forthly, do you and your girlfriend know how to use birth control devices? What I mean is do you know where to find condoms and how to put one on? If the answer is not, then having sex is a bad idea.

Finally, if you do have sex, then make sure you know where to get access to emergency contraception, that your girlfriend knows what to do if she misses her period, that both of you have access to a healthcare provider in the event that either of you develop odd lumps or bumps or any other sexually related problems. Sex doesn't equate that you will have problems, but the reality is that problems can happen which is why many folks wait until they are older to have sex when they have access to their own doctor. I am sure it would be really hard for either you or your girlfriend to explain to your parents why either of you would need to see the doctor if either of you had a sexual issue. Remember, sexual issues are not just STDs as girls, especially if they are virgins, could have a lot of pain down there the first time, and irregular periods are always an issue for younger girls.

P.S. While the danger of pregnancy for oral sex is nil the reality is there are still risks with that type of sex, too. STDs can be spread through oral sex just as easily as vaginal and anal sex. If you both are virgins, then you both will be all right. However, as you get older always have yourself and your partners tested for STDs.

Excellent post.
Other than that, we can't really say what's right and wrong, it depends on what you think, and how you were raised, and your own morals/standards.

[MARiFOX]

:yawn:step1.mindmeld with to see if she realy wants to
step2.were 2 condoms(to be saf...[nevermind i have no idea but u CAN still get AIDS! or other sexual illnesses... i'd hold off on sex and maybe masturbait together(be aware it may esculate from there) as long as u both want to and if its legal(and u use a comdom)u both should be fine.[try not to get her pregnate, imagine a 15 year old with a baby!]

p.s. yawn :yawn: looks like rape lol

[NeoKitai]

As I said, it's impossible to know if it is rape until I know what country the person is from. I'd get an answer in 12 hours, though.

[MARiFOX]

:eek:As I said, it's impossible to know if it is rape until I know what country the person is from. I'd get an answer in 12 hours, though.

:eek:its not rape if there both willing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[NeoKitai]

I never said it was. Just it best be legal. That's all I say.

[timster]

i had oral sex at late 12 so its fine, but it depends how you feel yourself.

[Spunky]

personaly I would wait. one i think you are a little young to be doing anything like that. now im not incouraging this by sayin this but it you did do any thing i would do oral because thier would be no unexpected outcome in 9 months if you know what i mean

[Oblivion]

:eek:

:eek:its not rape if there both willing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It technically is statutory rape in the US if either partner (or both) is/are under the age of 18, or 17, or 16 depending on the state.
Either parent could sue the other.

:yawn:step1.mindmeld with to see if she realy wants to
step2.were 2 condoms(to be saf...[nevermind i have no idea but u CAN still get AIDS! or other sexual illnesses... i'd hold off on sex and maybe masturbait together(be aware it may esculate from there) as long as u both want to and if its legal(and u use a comdom)u both should be fine.[try not to get her pregnate, imagine a 15 year old with a baby!]

p.s. yawn :yawn: looks like rape lol

Do not wear two condoms, it creates a large amount of friction between the two condoms, causing one or both to break.

[INFERNO]

If it goes to sex, then you have to consider the fact that you can only lose your virginity, as a male, once. Once you've lost it, you cant suddenly click on the "Back" or "Undo" button. So, I know you didn't mention having sexual intercourse, however, I feel the same way about oral sex: for both, ideally have a good, relatively strong relationship with the partner and be sure to know what both of you are doing.

[hman123]

you could do oral but i wouldnt go to far and have sex

[Death]

If it goes to sex, then you have to consider the fact that you can only lose your virginity, as a male, once.

I wouldn't worry about that specific part since ones virginity is not a material thing; it's an abstract concept. Of course, this doesn't discard the fact that there will be several other consequences to bear in mind.

[bud2.0]

no u are way too young i am 15 it's too early when you are teens and are finically and emotionally stable incase of an accident like a broken condom

[MARiFOX]

It technically is statutory rape in the US if either partner (or both) is/are under the age of 18, or 17, or 16 depending on the state.
Either parent could sue the other.



Do not wear two condoms, it creates a large amount of friction between the two condoms, causing one or both to break.

i said nevermind after that...hmm...what would happen if u wore 10 condoms

[MykeSoBe]

Well, it is oral sex, so it would not have as much of a chance to damage as regular intercourse. But I wouldn't advise doing that right now, and to wait until you know your girlfriend better. And if she's one of those popular girls at your school, then there's a way better chance she'll be distrustful and break up within a week.

[The Joker]

I personally want to wait until I have a serious girlfriend, and I'm in high school. I don't want to just do it with someone I don't care about.

[guacamole24]

I guess its just up to you or what you and her think is right.

[HelloWorld123456]

OK ... but i had my first oral at 9 ?? ... Right I didnt know WTF it was but ... if you think you want to do ... just it is illegal to have sex ... If i were you i wouldnt have sex at 13 ... i am 15 and still a "Virgin"

[ally.may33]

Many people say 13 is too young, some say age is just a number. It's completely your decision. No one can tell you to or not to do it. Lots of people say 13 year olds are too young to do lots of things, but many forget that quite a lot of 13 year olds are mature, strong, and know who they are. Before you go engaging in sexual activity, first make sure this is what you want and if you are ready, second talk with your partner (your gf) and make sure that what you are about to do will not change anything between the two of you and then there is the protection part. Since people think you are too young for sex, they make it pretty hard for you to get a hold of protection (condoms, pregnancy pills, etc.) If your mom takes pregnancy protection pills, patches, etc. you could try "borrowing" one for your gf to use, or you could get an older friend to get you some condoms. The only thing is these options may seem wrong to other people, and they can be pretty hard to do. Condom wise, you could use saran wrap (food wrap, plastic wrap, whatever you want to call it) or you could use the pull out method, which I don't recommend.
Good luck, be careful, and make your own wise decisions. :)

[HelloWorld123456]

Many people say 13 is too young, some say age is just a number. It's completely your decision. No one can tell you to or not to do it. Lots of people say 13 year olds are too young to do lots of things, but many forget that quite a lot of 13 year olds are mature, strong, and know who they are. Before you go engaging in sexual activity, first make sure this is what you want and if you are ready, second talk with your partner (your gf) and make sure that what you are about to do will not change anything between the two of you and then there is the protection part. Since people think you are too young for sex, they make it pretty hard for you to get a hold of protection (condoms, pregnancy pills, etc.) If your mom takes pregnancy protection pills, patches, etc. you could try "borrowing" one for your gf to use, or you could get an older friend to get you some condoms. The only thing is these options may seem wrong to other people, and they can be pretty hard to do. Condom wise, you could use saran wrap (food wrap, plastic wrap, whatever you want to call it) or you could use the pull out method, which I don't recommend.
Good luck, be careful, and make your own wise decisions. :)

I agree 99% with you but! Do not use FOOD WRAP AS CONDOM ! WTF?! Go buy one from a store or something ! GOD NO !!! DO NOT USE FOOD WRAPPING AS A CONDOM !

btw if you can ejaculate at 13 be careful .. and even if you dont ... still be carefull

[nick]

Condom wise, you could use saran wrap (food wrap, plastic wrap, whatever you want to call it) or you could use the pull out method, which I don't recommend.

Sorry, but thats terrible advice.

Don't use cling film or anything else like that. It be uncomfortable, may well tear and isnt designed for the job. The teat at the end of a condom is there for a purpose!

Even worse, dont even think about using "the pull out method". If you have full intercourse you must have a condom for the whole time, you WILL leak precum, you might not even know its happening, and the precum can cause a pregnancy.

[The Joker]

Yes, and I would say, if you even think about not using a condom, you may forget to pull out.

[HelloWorld123456]

Sorry, but thats terrible advice.

Don't use cling film or anything else like that. It be uncomfortable, may well tear and isnt designed for the job. The teat at the end of a condom is there for a purpose!

Even worse, dont even think about using "the pull out method". If you have full intercourse you must have a condom for the whole time, you WILL leak precum, you might not even know its happening, and the precum can cause a pregnancy.

Yes, and I would say, if you even think about not using a condom, you may forget to pull out.


Exactly and again ... DO NOT USE SERAN WRAP AS A CONDOM ! If you read this reply ... you might get into some deep shit man ... DO NOT USE SERAN WRAP AS A Condon !