Sex for the first time

[adamandcatarina444]

Hey guy theres a chance I might have sex with my girlfreind and im sure about it, we have a really good relationship. We've spent lots of good time together and sexual experiences too. But we want to see how vaginal sex feels. Weve talked about it and we have a condom and spermicide but I dont want to hurt her. I know its reality and she knows it might hurt too since a lot of girls bleed a little or experience a little or a lot of pain for the first time. My penis is pretty wide being a little over 2 inches. Its long too but thats controllable but do you guys have any advice for ways to loosen her up. I know fingering her is a good wya but any other advice? Preffereably from those that have had sex.

[pontiacdriver]

Besides fingering the girl the best way to loosen up the girl is to ensure that she is relaxed. Nothing is worse for sex than for either of you to get nervous as for a girl she can really tighten up and may not produce as much natural lubricant down there which creates friction and pain. Making sure that you both are totally comfortable is one of the most important things you can do.

When you actually have sex, then make sure you are doing so in a secure place where there is not a danger of anyone walking in on you both. Nothing can make your encounter worse than having a sword hanging over your heads and the fear that someone can catch you both. The result is that sex is going to be uncomfortable for you both.

Another thing about which you both need to consider is ensuring that you both are prepared for all eventualities when it comes to sex. What I mean is that if either of you develop a funny bump after sex or your girlfriend's period is late or if your condom breaks during sex that you both have access to a medical provider who can help you both. Nothing can ruin sex more than not knowing what you both can do if there is a problem. If you both do not have access for assistance if things go south, then I would really hold off on having sex. Even if you don't have to worry about STDs or pregnancy the reality is that for some girls they may have some complications after sex resulting in the need to see a gynecologist. Make sure your girlfriend has access to a healthcare provider who can deal with her "plumbing" down there otherwise you are playing Russian roulette by having sex with her.

In short, first times for sex rarely go by great, and just have a realistic expectation that your first time is going to be a learning experience for you both. Much like learning a new task it is going to probably take a couple of times before you both find sex enjoyable.

My final piece of advice is to ensure that you both have excellent communication. Without offering each other feedback during the actual sexual encounter, then you both will have a hard time. You both are still learning about each other's bodies, and it takes time to know each other's likes and dislikes. It would probably be good before you actually have sex to get to know your girlfriend's body and know the areas that are the most sensitive on her so that when you actually do it you will know what areas on which to focus.

[timster]

I agree with the above, but I have one thing to say to you about spermicide. It is absolutely useless. It ends up killing a few sperm, but it just pushes the sperm farther up into the vagina. Therefore increasing the chance of pregnancy.

[nick]

Well we're not allowed to discusss techniques, but obviously don't skimp on the foreplay, fingers and tongue come in handy, so that she's really ready. Then just take it slow. If she has her hymen intact then there will be some pain, there's no way round that.

Incidentally, you'd probably have to have really excessive girth to cause a real problem, so I wouldn't worry to much on that score. On the length issue be sensitive, if she's finding it uncomfortable you will just have to accept that up to the hilt is not the right option.