Eh. I think I'm becoming a Closet Alcoholic.

[Reality]

Yesterday, I turned up at school half-pissed on Jack Daniels and then had some more at around lunchtime.. and got busted by my swimming teacher/lifeguard just 15 minutes before the end of school. I was taken to my Year Head's office and questioned and stuff (she's also told my parents) and reckons (knows) there's an underlying problem. I went home and slept it off for about 9 hours, and now I'm up again all night about to go to school again in a few hours, as I luckily didn't get suspended. It's 05:30am now.

The problem is, I've got drunk and came to school once before and (narrowly) got away with it. Just yesterday I was out of luck.

I tend to drink a lot of stiff alcohol when I feel like it. And yeah, I am just 16 and pretty young. I'm a noticeable drunk because I'm more chatty than usual when I am drunk. I've been drinking since I was 14, but didn't drink much until I turned 16.

I'm not a "burnout" kid either, I'm usually well-behaved and my grades are B's and C's, which are good by UK standards.

I'm already known to be a self-cutter to my teachers, so I think I've shown myself up as a right fuck-up.

Yeah, I'm sorry this bit seems kind of a pointless rant. Just has really all came to a head. No judgmental replies please.

[Mzor203]

Now, you seem to know there IS a problem here, which is a good thing. The next step is doing something about it. And, well, that is going to take some motivation on your part, as well as some proactivity.

Being an alcoholic at 16 is not good. It's going to affect social life, grades, sports ( as you've maybe got a taste of), etc. One of these days you may end up getting drunk to the point where your ability to reason goes right out the window. You might end up doing any number of things that will lead to trouble, including go to school, which would NOT be good.

So, it's time to ask yourself if you want to stop. If you do, there are many options out there, many people who will be willing to help you if you choose that you do want to do something about this problem. And it is highly preferable to doing something that could put yourself or others in danger.

I know this may not have been the response you were looking for to this, but I urge you to at least think on it. You only live your life once. You need to make it a good one.

[byee]

One of the things I'll add here is that the stereotype of the alcoholic being a skid row 'bum' is inaccurate. Many otherwise successful people have a major problem with alcohol, and eventhough it's sometimes confusing to square 'success' with 'alcoholism', it can happen that way, and the success in other areas doesn't diminish the major problems the alcoholism causes in other areas.

You might need some professional help here, but you can start with AA meetings (look in the phone book), get yourself a Sponser there who will support sobriety, and use some self control. Eventhough you 'Want' a drink doesn't mean you have to succumb to the urge.

[Donkey]

How was your day?

You have a drinking problem. Sometimes that is hard to admit, but it looks like you've nearly done it. Try to stop before it's too late and you're drinking more, because it can get out of control. I think that contacting someone who can help you with this would be your best bet right now. Good luck.

[Reality]

Well, all the bottles of alky have been hid from me, and thankfully not that many people in school know about Tuesday's "episode".

I'm not dependant on alcohol or anything, it's just been lately. It's just felt like the most convenient thing to do. Maybe it's a phase.

[byee]

Good onya for taking the steps to avoid future trouble! But, beware the "it's just a phase" thing, that's a bad omen of your developing denial to the seriousness of the problem (or at least your urges). You've already crossed the line, each time it seems more normal to do so, so be on guard and be prepared to not give in.