over analysing

[Gumleaf]

this is becoming a real problem. why do i do it? why do i feel this insecure? why am i like this? i just wish these questions could be answered. i'm just hating life right now. i just want things to be normal. i just wish i could be normal. i want my friends to love me and care for me, but i make it so difficult for them by always over analysing everything and getting depressed all the time. soon i'll have no friends left and i don't want that. i thrive with the love shown by friends, but fall when i over analyse and assume the worst. how can i turn this around? i don't think i can, i don't know how i can? what can i do? i have no bloody idea!

[Mzor203]

Hey Stephen, I might not be able to give a ton of advice here, but... We are who we are. I know the feeling of over-analysing everything, and I too am unsure how to get around it. Sometimes there's no way to change how we see things.

Part of the over-analysing you are experiencing most likely comes from a fear that if you don't think everything through, you're going to fail at whatever it is you're doing. To overcome this is going to almost be like taking on one of your fears. Easier said than done. The easiest way to do it, though, is to do the exact opposite of what you naturally want to do. It's scary to do things without thinking them through, scary to go into a situation without having looked at things. I have a feeling this is also happening on a much more broad scale for you as well, meaning that you're spending too much time thinking about all the bad and less time thinking about the good.

Next time you find yourself sitting there, just thinking, get up, and go do something. Normally being quite cognitive is a good thing, but you need to be able to master your brain and the thoughts it contains. Letting it get out of control with the wrong type of thoughts and feelings is bad.

Now, with your friends... just enjoy them. Sometimes you may just have to put on a happy face if they seem to be getting overwhelmed, which can be a pain, but also remember that friends are there to help each other. Just make sure you give something back to them when they need help.

Try not thinking. It helps. Listen to music and really listen to it when you find yourself getting depressed. Start reading a book and really read it. Being able to master and focus your thoughts will hopefully help.

Again, I know it's easier said than done, I know this post was quite muddled up, but think about it - actually, no, don't think about it, just start doing. And I know all of us say this on here a ton, but you're a great guy, and you should take pride in that.

Hope things get better, Stephen, and take care.

[Truth]

Over analysing? I stopped doing it by just stopping my brain, then have fun with my freinds. You only need your brain for work and school. ;D Or, replace those thoughts with stuff you enjoy doing. It's hard to do. But, this is just from personal experience, you might ot have the same will power I do. =x