How can I explain to my friend?

[Miss Punk]

Ok so anyone who read the post in my last thread (http://www.virtualteen.org/forums/showthread.php?t=43271) about what happened on Sunday night will know that now two people know about my self-harm including my best friend.

Problem is, since that episode I haven't talked to my friend at all because I just don't know what to say. She told me in a text if I ever needed to talk she was there, and I really do need to talk I'm just feeling so screwed up that I can't describe how I'm feeling and am finding it hard to say anything. I really need her help, because I need someone to talk to when I'm feeling at my worst to save me from my self-destructiveness, but I don't want to be a burden on her. How can I tell her this without causing her more pain and trouble than I already have? I'm really not ok right now. I'm slowly losing it. I want to get help but I can't do it on my own. What do I do? :confused:

[byee]

Well, you're answering your own q here. it IS a lot to expect a friend to be 'therapeutic'. So, you can use her for support, but you need to get to a doctor for the therapeutic part. maybe the forst thing you and she can talk about is a way to get that who you can tell, and how she can help you say it so you get the 'healing' from the therapy, and the 'fun' and 'support' from her.

[Triceratops]

It's okay to feel like that. You've gone through a something pretty traumatic and all you need to do is take things step by step.

Your friend cares about you a lot and is always going to be there for you but I think you should talk to her when you feel you're ready to open up to her. So take everything at your own pace. :)

[Miss Punk]

Thank you.
I keep being told I need to get some professional help. I agree with that, and I'd like to get some, so I'm waiting for an appointment at the moment since the doctor said they were going to let my GP know. I don't know how long that will be though. It's hard just getting through every day right now, so someone to talk to is something I really need right now. I'm just worried that it will put too much pressure on my friend.

[STAYING_STRONG4HIM]

I know what you mean...I think your friend is willing to be there for you...and for the time being I think she is willing to do anything she can to help you right now. Of course you need to seek professional help...and once you do that you can just have fun with her...and that will take the pressure off of her once you get some professional help...but having a friend to tell things right now I think would do you some good. Maybe you could just vent and tell her things...my friend is always glad to just let me vent no matter what I say...she'll listen...maybe your friend could point out some things that in this haze you didn't see before...just some ideas...

[dstnyisurs]

Try telling her first that if she feels its too much of a load on her, you can stop anytime, or if she doesn't want to hear it you can stop anytime. That will make you feel like she is willingly listening, and it will confirm that she is willingly listening to you and can stop you anytime she feels uncomfortable.
Try telling her you don't want to be a burden on her and you feel bad unloading on her. I'm sure she wants to be there for you, but that will open up conversaton for confirmation that she is indeed okay to hear it.

[Truth]

Thank you.
I keep being told I need to get some professional help. I agree with that, and I'd like to get some, so I'm waiting for an appointment at the moment since the doctor said they were going to let my GP know. I don't know how long that will be though. It's hard just getting through every day right now, so someone to talk to is something I really need right now. I'm just worried that it will put too much pressure on my friend. It makes a freind feel horrible when they can't help. Let her help you, if it was too much pressure she wouldn't offer the help. And hope you get an appointment.. =]

[Miss Punk]

dstnyisurs: Thank you, I hadn't thought about that before, your answer has really helped me. I think I will say that to her.
Truth: Thank you, that is also a new way of looking at it I hadn't seen before. I wish I knew what she was thinking about me! I guess I can't though so I will just have to work with my non-psychic brain.

[dstnyisurs]

You're quite welcome. Anytime.