Breakdown

[Shattered Soul]

I had a really emotional day yesterday. My driving instructor didn't turn up and this added to all of the other feelings of abandonment I have and I ended up having a complete breakdown. I disappeared from my home from 2pm until 8pm as I felt like a total failure and that my parents are better off without me. So I just wandered up and down roads for hrs - no idea where I went really. Eventually, i decided to go and see my mum at work, I have no idea why, usually i'd go to my grandparents and i thought my mum would yell if I disrupted her working. She was very shocked to see me, especially in tears, she sat me down and and asked what was going on as this was so against my character. She got me a hot drink and let me stay til she finished work (she rang my dad though) and we walked home together.
Somehow, throughout my breakdown, I managed not to SH which was really surprising. In fact, I havent hurt myself since Friday :D even though I feel really depressed at the moment. Really trying to fight against it, trying not to cave. And finding it really really difficult. Think my mum's gonna find out about my SHing soon, though. Dreading it.:(
xxCathyxx

[Project Delta]

Well done on not self harming! its always good to hear.
I know how you feel about you parents finding out about your SHing and i felt exactly the same. My parents ended up going through the texts on my phone and they found out that way. But my parents were really cool about it, becausse i had asked for long sleeve shirts for school, (uniform), which they said no to. then when they found out i cut myself, i told them thast why i wanted them and she went out the next day and got 3.
Although this may seem hard to concept for your own situation maybe you could tell you mum? if she doesnt tell your dad. Because maybe she will listen to you and therefore try to involve you more to help with your abandonemennt issues. but then again, having ADHD makes me generally shy, and i couldnt have told my parents myself.
So heres my advice for you :) and 7weeks for me with no cutting. Hope i helped you out.

ALso if you ever want to chat, and you have MSN add me. Its in my contact information :)

[Triceratops]

I'm really glad to hear that you haven't hurt yourself recently. :)

If your feeling really depressed right now, try and take your mind off things by treating yourself to something enjoyable such as watching a movie, reading a good book or cooking something really yummy...there are plenty of good ways to distract you from feeling upset and depressed.

Here is something I usually recommend to banish stress or feeling down - trampolining. I find trampolining really lifts my mood up and as it releases endorphins so you'll feel a whole lot happier after you've had about 10-15 minutes on it, and it's very fun!

As for your mum, hiding things from your parents never works out, honestly. I really do think you should tell her before it's too late. If she finds out BEFORE you tell her, her reaction will be a whole lot worse than how she would react if YOU told her. After you've told her, it will eventually sink in and she will try and support you as she does sound like a very caring type of parent by what you've wrote.

[Shattered Soul]

Thanks guys, I've had a very good thoughts and realisations over the past few days:D
There is a reason for everything, and the reason i've come up with for my past experiences and self harming is that I can help others try to overcome similar experiences, as for the SHing ive realised i can help myself and others at the same time:D
I know longer need to seek reasons for why things have happened to me. This is the only reason I need:)

[ShinigamiMaiden]

wow! that is something i could never do. the slightest thing sets me off im glad that everyones not like me. (: